Girl who dumped me 2 weeks ago, texts today, how to set up as FwB?

[Scars]

Could be an orbiter, and even if she is ****ing some other dude, it doesn't necessarily mean game over.

 

[DamnSon]

Yeah but how am I suppose to respond, she's apologizing? And then saying "I THINK I'm going home tomorrow morning =\" seems like a bull**** excuse

 

[El Payaso]

She probably wants some validation and once she gets some attention, she'll fade out.

 

[sazc]

I didn't see her partying but saw her in snaps with another dude, it could have been a guy friend..she has a few but let's be real. What do I even say to that. Is she allologizing

Nothing, you say nothing. She hasn't asked you a question that needs responding. Stay silent, she will text again.

I'm just going ng to say, if I were hung up on a dude, and I sincerely needed time to study, I would say "give me 2 weeks of time, we'll chat on the phone, but let me focus" and there would be no extraneous dude pics.

That's how a woman who respects her man behaves

 

[Scars]

She probably wants some validation and once she gets some attention, she'll fade out.

Most likely the case. She seems undecided, like she wants to hear you tell her to stay. She "thinks" she's going to leave tomorrow. But she might end up flaking. Up to you OP what you want to do. A lay is possible, but if she's just looking for some validation and then flakes, well you're back to square one again.

 

[DamnSon]

Nothing, you say nothing. She hasn't asked you a question that needs responding. Stay silent, she will text again.

I'm just going ng to say, if I were hung up on a dude, and I sincerely needed time to study, I would say "give me 2 weeks of time, we'll chat on the phone, but let me focus" and there would be no extraneous dude pics.

That's how a woman who respects her man behaves

Exactly. So nothing huh? I feel like she's guilty and wanting to justify to herself what she did to make herself feel better. Part of me wants to be like "lol are you talking about our relationship ship? Are you just trying to make yourself feel Better? Because I'm fine with it, it's your loss, not mine." Id also like to call her a ***** but I won't say any of that because I wanna smash again lol. Yeah, she broke up with me...although she did say a few weeks before the break up she's trying her best to meet My needs and get her stuff done too and it's difficult. I WAS difficult at times, that I do know...but I didn't fee respected so I peacocked a lot

 

[DamnSon]

She does leave home for a month or so for Christmas break in a day or two, feel like I'm pressed for time here lol.

 

[sazc]

Exactly. So nothing huh? I feel like she's guilty and wanting to justify to herself what she did to make herself feel better. Part of me wants to be like "lol are you talking about our relationship ship? Are you just trying to make yourself feel Better? Because I'm fine with it, it's your loss, not mine." Id also like to call her a ***** but I won't say any of that because I wanna smash again lol. Yeah, she broke up with me...although she did say a few weeks before the break up she's trying her best to meet My needs and get her stuff done too and it's difficult. I WAS difficult at times, that I do know...but I didn't fee respected so I peacocked a lot

No, you say nothing. SHE needs to be the one to say 'let's talk'. If you are going alpha on this, which you should, she needs to be the beta and ask for a Convo.
There are always a thousand things we would like to say to our ex lovers, but the best thing to say is the one thing that shouts "you didn't burn me at all" - THAT is communicated by being silent

 

[sazc]

She does leave home for a month or so for Christmas break in a day or two, feel like I'm pressed for time here lol.

If you are worth it to her she WILL make the time between now and the end of that month.

Sit tight

 

[DamnSon]

No, you say nothing. SHE needs to be the one to say 'let's talk'. If you are going alpha on this, which you should, she needs to be the beta and ask for a Convo.
There are always a thousand things we would like to say to our ex lovers, but the best thing to say is the one thing that shouts "you didn't burn me at all" - THAT is communicated by being silent

Do you think her saying "i needed to do that. i had to do good and i hope you know that " is her way of initiating a talk, but without her coming right out and saying it? And I'm losing the opportunity here?

 

[DamnSon]

If you are worth it to her she WILL make the time between now and the end of that month.

Sit tight

True, it's. 3 hour drive. I suppose she could
Invite me up, or make a little time to see Before she leaves. I did extend the offer and tell
Her to let's hang and catch up so she knows I'm open to it. True that.

 

[sazc]

Do you think her saying "i needed to do that. i had to do good and i hope you know that " is her way of initiating a talk, but without her coming right out and saying it? And I'm losing the opportunity here?

I think you are doing what needy chicks do and trying to find some hidden agenda in a text message. Other guys on here would call you out for being beta.

The only good conversation is a straightforward conversation. You need to stop looking for hidden meanings, and subterfuge. On the real, if she gives a sh1t she WILL be straightforward with you and ask to talk.

You JUST asked her to hang. You have sent the CLEAR (no hidden meanings, no bullsh1t) message that you will see her again, that it is safe to ask for that Convo. Go NC and give her the chance to respect you by asking for the conversation.

Then keep her at an arms length until she proves herself.

 

[sazc]

You need to find your value. This is too much for one chick that pulled this BS

 

[DamnSon]

I think you are doing what needy chicks do and trying to find some hidden agenda in a text message. Other guys on here would call you out for being beta.

The only good conversation is a straightforward conversation. You need to stop looking for hidden meanings, and subterfuge. On the real, if she gives a sh1t she WILL be straightforward with you and ask to talk.

You JUST asked her to hang. You have sent the CLEAR (no hidden meanings, no bullsh1t) message that you will see her again, that it is safe to ask for that Convo. Go NC and give her the chance to respect you by asking for the conversation.

Then keep her at an arms length until she proves herself.

Amen. I am super analytical and always trying to dissect things...in my head she's like "damn I really ****ed up" why else would you text me after dumping me. Funny because I'm talking to a few girls here now and getting out of the funk, but yeah..like ah go go awayyy I have no time for her games

 

[sazc]

Amen. I am super analytical and always trying to dissect things...in my head she's like "damn I really ****ed up" why else would you text me after dumping me. Funny because I'm talking to a few girls here now and getting out of the funk, but yeah..like ah go go awayyy I have no time for her games

Stop being so OCD about texts. I was the same way. You get anxiety from it.

Read what they send. That's what they said. We can infer a thousand things from it but its much simpler to take it as it comes, at face value.

She said nothing about thinking she Fed up. You are projecting, and its got you all up in your head. That is not a healthy place to be. Stop. Be a man and walk the F away. Let her come to you

 

[marmel75]

Do you think her saying "i needed to do that. i had to do good and i hope you know that " is her way of initiating a talk, but without her coming right out and saying it? And I'm losing the opportunity here?

No it's her way of justifying her behaviour to herself. Women are masters of always blaming someone or something for their poor behaviour.

In fact I had a chick act poorly in a similar fashion once and come out and admit her poor behaviour and say she knows it and doesn't even feel bad about it...I actually respected it...we are still friends today, I don't talk or see her that often but she is a cool chick even though she is seriously BPD and knows it...

I was like damn...what a refreshing change...a woman who admits their faults.

 

[RangerMIke]

Tell her what you want. If she wants something else than she'll let you know that way you are not wasting each other's time.

 

[DamnSon]

Well, I didn't answer and she watched all my snaps, so she's definitely thinking. In my head she feels guilty maybe things are moving forward with some new guy and she's trying to tidy up the past because she feels guilty. Whatever she knows I'm open to see her so I'll let her come to me

 

[sazc]

Well, I didn't answer and she watched all my snaps, so she's definitely thinking. In my head she feels guilty maybe things are moving forward with some new guy and she's trying to tidy up the past because she feels guilty. Whatever she knows I'm open to see her so I'll let her come to me

NC

 

[Who Dares Win]

Again as a general rule if you find something wrong at gut level, feel stressed, confused or pissed off then you're sure its your gut letting you know that it doesnt work.

Any girl worth your time and effort that has a decent interest wont confuse you, annoy you, stress you and most of all force you to open a thread here asking for suggestions.