wifehunter
Master Don Juan
It's cool, I'm not worried. It's meant to be, or it isn't. I also would hate to come from a place of weakness or lacking.she'll lose interest in like a week if you don't do anything
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It's cool, I'm not worried. It's meant to be, or it isn't. I also would hate to come from a place of weakness or lacking.she'll lose interest in like a week if you don't do anything
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
I don't bang chicks, I attract them.Maybe you should re-title this thread "How to lose an interested woman in 10 days", lmao...
I shudder at thinking about the amount of times you've missed out on banging a chick following this method.
approach anxiety isn't really a method though lolMaybe you should re-title this thread "How to lose an interested woman in 10 days", lmao...
I shudder at thinking about the amount of times you've missed out on banging a chick following this method.
LMAO...OK Eunuch...deny yourself your masculinity if you want to...I don't bang chicks, I attract them.
I'm not into the fornication thing.
Sex, causes neediness and complications anyway. All those natural body producing chemicals, I can imagine the withdrawals.
No sex = a non hungry state
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Hey, wifehunter......It's cool, I'm not worried. It's meant to be, or it isn't. I also would hate to come from a place of weakness or lacking.
Thanks, I totally appreciate it, but I've got way too many things on my plate, as it were. (You don't even want to know!)Hey, wifehunter......
I get that you're on a seriously long dry spell or self imposed hiatus while you're homeless and don't want to just hook with with anybody. However, that said, why don't you try to strike up a brief conversation and gauge if she's still interested in you the next time you're at Sprouts.
Ask her for opinion on cooking something or some diet style like paleo, vegan, South Beach/Atkins, whatever... "Hey, [smile], I'm making __ tonight for some friends and was wondering if __ pairs well with ___. Thoughts?" Open-ended question, so she can't just say closed-ended answers to closed-ended questions with a "yes" or "no" and bounce the approach. After all, she's getting paid to help customers shop.
Feel the situation out, if her IL is maintaining, do a chill low maintenance coffee date close with a specific date and time.
Even if her IL is passing the expiration date by now, you'll at least get experience with approaching and re-calibrating your dormant game.
Good luck, bro.
You told a complete stranger "your hair is completely stunning". I'm not sure how you would characterize that as "doing nothing" or not initiating. Seems to me you totally initiated the interaction. At the very least, you hit the ball and left it in her court.These days, around here, ladies interepret any kind of intiation as chasing. So, once again... doing nothing wins!
I was "in passing" so I wasn't going out of my way. She just happened to be standing there. Call it "passive initiation"? It felt normal, not like I was making any special effort.You told a complete stranger "your hair is completely stunning". I'm not sure how you would characterize that as "doing nothing" or not initiating. Seems to me you totally initiated the interaction. At the very least, you hit the ball and left it in her court.
Noted. It's just that I read a lot of stories here where guys claim to do nothing, when it's actually clear they are the one who originally initiated the interaction and initially expressed the interest. What they are really saying usually is that they initiated and then sat back and let the girl take it from there.I was "in passing" so I wasn't going out of my way. She just happened to be standing there. Call it "passive initiation"? It felt normal, not like I was making any special effort.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Gotchu, instead of "nothing" it should read "barely anything".Noted. It's just that I read a lot of stories here where guys claim to do nothing, when it's actually clear they are the one who originally initiated the interaction and initially expressed the interest. What they are really saying usually is that they initiated and then sat back and let the girl take it from there.
Sounds like a krauser set, I likeMate, I honestly don't give a sh*t what she appreciates. I care what works.
If you just go up to a woman and give her a compliment, she will thank you for it and move on. She isn't going to suddenly number-close you, just because you fed her ego.
You need to stack on top of that to keep the conversation moving to where you want it to go.
The point is one of value. When you first approach a woman, you need to be the one to give value. Usually after about a minute, she starts to invest more heavily - and then you can play off her.
Walking around giving women compliments is nice, but you need to escalate.
Example with a girl two days back:
Me: Excuse me. Can I tell you something quickly?
Girl: [nothing]
Me: [just ploughing] I just saw you walk out of that shop, and I thought you look really nice.
Girl: Thanks
Me: [STACK] You look very Scandanavian.
Girl: Why?
Me: You have the blonde hair, sharp features, and leather jacket.
I'm done pushing things... from where I'm at, any escalation comes off as chasing/neediness. That's the way it is here.Those guys daygame in London. The typical opener there now is "I hope you speak English...".
I use the London-daygame model outside of London, therefore I have to adapt it slightly. I still often use where she comes from as a talking point though - the assumption still works even when they are mostly English. And I repeat the same sh*t over and over.
She wasn't the first girl with blonde hair and a leather jacketThat equals "you look Swedish/Scandanavian" to me lol.
I understand that @wifehunter has some sort of thing about not banging women. Okay - fine. But, escalation is more than that. At least escalate it to the next level of conversation.
You would be shocked how intimate you can get with a hot girl in just 5 minutes. In a half-decent set, it's normal to come away from it knowing where she lives, what she does for a living, her likes and dislikes, etc.
You might as well try to push things forward to that level of discourse. Experiment, at least.
Chasing is automatic rejection, so yeah I avoid it.There is a massive difference between a want and a need.
Are you trying to protect yourself from rejection?
Honestly, I am thinking that you just don't want to put yourself out there properly. Then rationalizing it as "I'm not needy - unlike those other guys".
It's avoidance.
There's a subtle difference between "chasing" and "going for what you want". The former comes from a place of desperation, the second comes from a place of strength and masculinity.Chasing is automatic rejection, so yeah I avoid it.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
It doesn't matter, she calls it on this one.There's a subtle difference between "chasing" and "going for what you want". The former comes from a place of desperation, the second comes from a place of strength and masculinity.
That's just from her perspective. You need to be mainly concerned with your own frame, your own perspective. Who cares what she thinks, ultimately? If she decides to reject you, then from your frame and perspective, she isn't worth worrying about, and she isn't worth your time. If she doesn't see the value in you, then she isn't the person you were hoping she was. After all, you don't want someone who doesn't appreciate your value, do you?If she thinks your chasing, even if you're just going for what you want. You're chasing. It's completely subject to her emotions.
Yeah, I always get better results not giving a sh!t anyway. If I gave a sh!t, I'd be going for what I want. These ladies have some of the things that I want, but not all.That's just from her perspective. You need to be mainly concerned with your own frame, your own perspective. Who cares what she thinks, ultimately? If she decides to reject you, then from your frame and perspective, she isn't worth worrying about, and she isn't worth your time. If she doesn't see the value in you, then she isn't the person you were hoping she was. After all, you don't want someone who doesn't appreciate your value, do you?
You're right that she has the power to choose whether or not to fvck you/go out with you/whatever. But you can't take that out of the equation, it's just part of the risk of living. It takes two to tango, if she doesn't want to play her part then you move on, "no fvcks given" as they say here.
chasing implies she's running awayChasing is automatic rejection, so yeah I avoid it.
where are you in orange county? I dont think all girls are like thisYeah, I always get better results not giving a sh!t anyway. If I gave a sh!t, I'd be going for what I want. These ladies have some of the things that I want, but not all.
At this point, I have no good reasons to close anyone. I know what I want, but they either don't have it, or I'm not aware that they do.
And, I don't have the energy to find out anymore. (too many dissappointments.)
So, I should probably quit trying, because it's going to take a miracle, anyway. I don't do miracles. I'm not Omnipotent, He is.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.