OLD Rule #1

[marmel75]

Women who give you their number without you asking for it are NOT going to meet up with you, with few exceptions. They are a waste of time, classic case of an AW. If you make plans with them make sure to double book that night.

I've had it happen at least 15 times and NONE of those women ever met up with me.... and I've met a lot of women via OLD...so do the math on those percentages.

 

[ubercat]

Now this is interesting. Different results from 2 seasoned operators. @Espi thoughts?

 

[JohnChops]

Any anti dump's advice continues to be true . He always said "if a girl gives you her number she is NOT interested ".

 

[Solomon]

Strongly disagree.

Espi what are your thoughts on women who accept but they are busy and the date doesn't happen for a week

For example you talk to her on Sunday get her number but she is not free till Friday

Granted this chick I'm talking is a lawyer but i'm sensing low interest

 

[Bible_Belt]

I'd cut the lawyer some slack. They work a lot. Maybe she wants to get drunk and fvcked, which is why she is waiting until the weekend.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Ironically I've seen some women state on their profile that they're not looking for Pen pals or text buddies. that they want to meet in person.

Does that mean guaranteed "hook up" or are these entitled ladies looking for free lunches and dinners?

 

[Glassguy]

I've met several that after several messages back and forth, they gave me their number. Its always something like "I dont get on here much so why dont you text me.....".

I believe its a chicks way of being aggressive. Out of those, I have met up with every one of them that i was interested in meeting up with, and I banged every one of them that I wanted to bang after meeting up.

I am meeting one out this evening that gave me her number. Just through the recent banter, she is very sexual and should be DTF.

 

[Solomon]

I'd cut the lawyer some slack. They work a lot. Maybe she wants to get drunk and fvcked, which is why she is waiting until the weekend.

What's BB

Good to see an old face

Agreed working in the corporate world now is no joke and this lawyer is definitely worth the wait

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I've met several that after several messages back and forth, they gave me their number. Its always something like "I dont get on here much so why dont you text me.....".

I believe its a chicks way of being aggressive. Out of those, I have met up with every one of them that i was interested in meeting up with, and I banged every one of them that I wanted to bang after meeting up.

I am meeting one out this evening that gave me her number. Just through the recent banter, she is very sexual and should be DTF.

Why are they giving their number so quick? Is it your profile pic or something?

 

[BeTheChange]

Rule stays the same. Get them out ASAP.

I have so little time for texts it's not even funny anymore. I'm practically at a "Hi. How are you? Drinks? Cool. Wednesday 8pm" type of conversation and if they're interested they will meet up with you. Unless you're EXTREMELY witty you aren't going to sway a girl with conversation alone. Either she's already interested or she isn't.

Few harmless fluff messages. Don't mention how "hot" she is. Ask for the number and arrange the date in the same message. Done.

 

[Solomon]

Rule stays the same. Get them out ASAP.

I have so little time for texts it's not even funny anymore. I'm practically at a "Hi. How are you? Drinks? Cool. Wednesday 8pm" type of conversation and if they're interested they will meet up with you. Unless you're EXTREMELY witty you aren't going to sway a girl with conversation alone. Either she's already interested or she isn't.

Few harmless fluff messages. Don't mention how "hot" she is. Ask for the number and arrange the date in the same message. Done.

I like that less texting and more "in person interaction"

the problem I use to have (and most guys as well) is to much texting, I keep it quiet and than meet up if she flakes oh well there is a back up if there is no back up oh well I'm still doing me

 

[BeTheChange]

I like that less texting and more "in person interaction"

the problem I use to have (and most guys as well) is to much texting, I keep it quiet and than meet up if she flakes oh well there is a back up if there is no back up oh well I'm still doing me

Bro, I live in a sweet place, right next to the docks. First date is always low key, low investment and now at a bar 2 minutes walk from my house. That way, if they flake (and some always will) I don't lose anything. And I try and double book if possible. It's the best method.

 

[Filter]

Most guys ask for the number then progress to text then ask for a date.

I choose to get straight to the point and invite them to drink with me without even asking for the number. Not all women whom I invite will accept, but in my experience, the ones who DO accept my invite will almost always offer their number to me, without my ever even asking for it, and they will very rarely cancel or flake on me.

Agreed. Although sometimes I'll suggest we exchange numbers first if I think the girl might prefer that in terms of building up comfort. But usually if they're interested, you can suggest the meet before the number.

At the end of the day, I don't think there are any rules in OLD. My only experience has been with Tinder and only for a few weeks, but it feels like a modern Somme. I really don't have any expectations... I just do the same thing with every match I have. I don't have time to actually meet up with all the interested ones. I think OLD is just a gigantic crap-shoot and if you're attractive you can basically do whatever the hell you want.

 

[marmel75]

Strongly disagree.

I'm not talking about after you've already met up in person, I'm talking about when you ask if they are up for grabbing a drink via message and they respond with Sure and give you their number...its never ended up equalling a date..

 

[marmel75]

Ironically I've seen some women state on their profile that they're not looking for Pen pals or text buddies. that they want to meet in person.

Me too...not sure if any of those are the ones I was referring to...typically once they agree to meeting up I get their number, I'm referring to the ones who give the number after I suggest grabbing a drink in person but before I asked for the number

 

[Solomon]

I personally feel a bit turned off when they suggest greater than 3 days to meet, but I also think it doesn't hurt to (tepidly) go along with it.

I always assume they'll flake, so a Plan B is a must--especially when a few days go by with no contact. Doublebooking is option #1 for me. Invite another chick for FRI, an hour or two before or after the other scheduled date, and my chances for a successful date immediately double. I can always ask to reschedule the lesser-attractive date.

In my opinion I would go along with it but I would maintain the edge on that frame:

"That sounds great Hon I'll catch up to you later in the week then Have a great day!!" This creates tension and uncertainty, which in my opinion are GOOD things.

I WANT them to wonder if I'll forget about them.
I WANT them to wait on ME to confirm the date.
I WANT them to initiate texts.

Unless she initiates text in the interim, I would go 100% ghost until THURS aft., then text:

"Hi Hon how's your week going??"

If she replies then I would get to the point and invite/confirm the date for Friday:

"Good to hear just making sure we're still on for tomorrow night. See you at 7 at The Rusty Nail on 6th and Main?"

Genius!!!

I can see why now you have had so much success with online dating, good to see a vet giving solid advice like this

 

[mrgoodstuff]

In my opinion there's no guaranteed hookup.

Date #1 for me is a drink or two only. NO food.

Smart, let her drink to lower her guard but no free money...

 

[BeTheChange]

Also...the LAST thing I want is to get a negative gut feeling about the chick whilst in the middle of eating.

I usually know within 5 mins. of meeting them if I'll be making out with them in the parking lot after saying goodbye. No food required.

If they order 2 drinks, there most definitely will be some making out later.

More than 2 drinks? 50/50 shot of a lay.

Like this. I think a short first date, drinks only has its merits. Then go for kiss. Ill try this. No use progressing to dinner if it isn't going anywhere.

 

[CMNILS87]

Genius!!!

I can see why now you have had so much success with online dating, good to see a vet giving solid advice like this

Just did this with a girl. She texts and cancels but wants to reschedule asap aNd apologizes. I say Saturday afternoon, I'll text Friday to make sure everything is good. I feel with OLD, you haven't had a chance to meet yet, but they always want to talk a little to make sure you're not weird. I don't have a problem with some witty sarcastic banter to leave an impression. Her going into a OLD in the dark can be super bad because she'll be defensive all night. You have to work that much harder on the back end and I prefer not to.

 

[marmel75]

Just did this with a girl. She texts and cancels but wants to reschedule asap aNd apologizes. I say Saturday afternoon, I'll text Friday to make sure everything is good. I feel with OLD, you haven't had a chance to meet yet, but they always want to talk a little to make sure you're not weird. I don't have a problem with some witty sarcastic banter to leave an impression. Her going into a OLD in the dark can be super bad because she'll be defensive all night. You have to work that much harder on the back end and I prefer not to.

I've never found that to be true. Most of the best dates I've gone on were ones where we barely talked before hand. If the girl isn't comfortable once she has been around you for 5-10 minutes its because of something you are doing or not doing, not the fact you haven't texted her back and forth enough times.