My girlfriend seems to be not very responsive

[ethann]

Hi,

I am dating a girl I like. I wrote about my history here. So far, everything seems ok, but I have some problems and I'd like to know the board opinion. I'll be short:

I am dating this girl since 2 months. She seems to have high interest on me, she told her friends we are togheter, we sleep every weekend, we make a lot of events togheter, etc. However, there are mainly two things that make me think:

1. She takes time to answer me. For example, if we have a whatsapp conversation, and I ask something:
Me: "So then when they will be available?"
She: "I dont know what to say! maybe you should ask them... How are you, everthing ok?"
Today I said :"I see you don't want to say anything, because it took 1 and a half hour to answer!" (I put an emoticon to give some humor to my sentence". She answered me "ahhaa, come on I am doing work staff, what your sister told about (bla bla)? By the way, I do not know if i did well with that answer.

My question here is: How should I approach these situations? Should I let her know, or maybe should I go silent? I do not know what is the correct approach and I think it is very important, since if I am very reactive I know I will lose my framework. Otherwise, if I simulate I do not care I might act as a total beta.

2. Sometimes she seems to not to imply me in her future. For example, going abroad for working three months.

I do not know if I am a little bit obssesed about all of this, in general, I do not know how to act when the chick seems to be not very responsive. Looking forward to your answers!

Thanks.

PS: She is my girlfriend, and I like her as LTR.

 

[ethann]

Yes, but how? I am looking to that. I actually have a (I think good) life, but my mentality sometimes does not work as a DJ, and that is what I am trying to fix !

 

[AllDay85]

Hi,

I am dating a girl I like. I wrote about my history here. So far, everything seems ok, but I have some problems and I'd like to know the board opinion. I'll be short:

I am dating this girl since 2 months. She seems to have high interest on me, she told her friends we are togheter, we sleep every weekend, we make a lot of events togheter, etc. However, there are mainly two things that make me think:

1. She takes time to answer me. For example, if we have a whatsapp conversation, and I ask something:
Me: "So then when they will be available?"
She: "I dont know what to say! maybe you should ask them... How are you, everthing ok?"
Today I said :"I see you don't want to say anything, because it took 1 and a half hour to answer!" (I put an emoticon to give some humor to my sentence". She answered me "ahhaa, come on I am doing work staff, what your sister told about (bla bla)? By the way, I do not know if i did well with that answer.

My question here is: How should I approach these situations? Should I let her know, or maybe should I go silent? I do not know what is the correct approach and I think it is very important, since if I am very reactive I know I will lose my framework. Otherwise, if I simulate I do not care I might act as a total beta.

2. Sometimes she seems to not to imply me in her future. For example, going abroad for working three months.

I do not know if I am a little bit obssesed about all of this, in general, I do not know how to act when the chick seems to be not very responsive. Looking forward to your answers!

Thanks.

PS: She is my girlfriend, and I like her as LTR.

You should never ask a woman what is taking so long to respond. This establishes a frame where you need her, and not the other way around.

My best advice is to stop worrying about get responses to you and start talking to other women.

 

[El Payaso]

As a man, it should be the other way around. She should be worrying about you not replying fast enough, not including her in your future etc.

You need her too much. Stop worrying about her and worry about your own life. When you are a busy man and have other prospective women around, you won't care if she takes ten hours to reply because it simply won't matter to you.

You're slowly developing one-itis. Tread carefully.

 

[Speculator E]

When you first start dating a chick the first few months are full of $hit tests no matter how good you think it is as she is figuring if you are a beta or alpha. More often then not it's a trap that put you off guard. Remember that. If I was to guess it sound like you dropped your guard when she was $hit testing you to the max and now you failed. A girl doesn't fall in love with you when you make them comfortable. They fall in love when you cause them drama.

 

[ethann]

Thanks to all the responses... @Speculator E , give me some credit! I am trying to do my best. I actually think I have passed some tests, and I am facing now new ones, that's why I am asking you how to approach them.

So far I think I will go ghost and less responsive. I'll be centered on my work, and let's see how it works. I'll keep you updated. Any new advices are more than welcome.

 

[Trump]

1. She takes time to answer me. For example, if we have a whatsapp conversation, and I ask something:
Me: "So then when they will be available?"
She: "I dont know what to say! maybe you should ask them... How are you, everthing ok?"
Today I said :"I see you don't want to say anything, because it took 1 and a half hour to answer!" (I put an emoticon to give some humor to my sentence". She answered me "ahhaa, come on I am doing work staff, what your sister told about (bla bla)? By the way, I do not know if i did well with that answer.
My question here is: How should I approach these situations? Should I let her know, or maybe should I go silent?

Bro how do you have constant sex with a good looking girl for 2 months, and then you text her that and ask a question like this? What do you expect her to say? "I love you, I miss you, I want to rip my clothes off and have sex with you right now?"

You are having sex with her. She delays a text for a little bit and you freak out? It seems like we need more emotional support from girls than actual sex. Anyway bro just relax, keep having sex with her and don't change anything. You are looking for trouble when there isn't any.

2. Sometimes she seems to not to imply me in her future. For example, going abroad for working three months.
I do not know if I am a little bit obssesed about all of this, in general, I do not know how to act when the chick seems to be not very responsive. Looking forward to your answers!
Thanks.
PS: She is my girlfriend, and I like her as LTR.

You have been dating her for 2 months and you are worried that she is not talking about you guys getting married, having kids and starting a family with a white picket fence? Come on bro, you have to be SO good the she is worried you aren't having sex with other girls and you guys aren't married, not you.

Just keep having sex with her, the emotional stuff is for HER to deal with, not you.

 

[Yewki]

Today I said :"I see you don't want to say anything, because it took 1 and a half hour to answer!" (I put an emoticon to give some humor to my sentence).

Never... do that again.

If she doesn't respond, pretend you have a life.

 

[Speculator E]

Thanks to all the responses... @Speculator E , give me some credit! I am trying to do my best. I actually think I have passed some tests, and I am facing now new ones, that's why I am asking you how to approach them.

So far I think I will go ghost and less responsive. I'll be centered on my work, and let's see how it works. I'll keep you updated. Any new advices are more than welcome.

You are asking for advice aren't you? Don't think that the $hit test ever stop. They always come out with new ones.

Going silent is good. But don't just go silent because it's the standard Sosuave advice. Your mental process should be she is in the wrong because you ask her a legit question about her taking 2 hrs to reply back and she reply back with some bs answer. Notice she didn't even say Sorry.

Therefore you have a legit reason to withdraw your love and attention. Go silent and let her guess what's wrong. This is how an alpha male would react. Good luck.

 

[Muscle brain]

You show to much investment! mirror her behaviour. Sometimes don´t respond to her message for one day on whatsapp. let her chase you.. Text are for making dates and not Chit Chat with girls thats for your dudes...