Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Mic. Fiend's 50 Approaches Journal - Feeback Wanted

Derek Flint

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Yeah, you have a right to defend yourself, but rolling up on a girl and "grinding" her was wrong, and is considered sexual assault.

And the fact that you and your "niggas" wanted to beatdown her b/f outside is dumb - you all would have ended up in jail, or worse, over some random AW

Strictly AFC behavior.

As for the girls behavior, how would you react if some random dude came up and started grinding you from behind?
 

Microphone Fiend

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1. In the context of the club I thought it was alright

2. Fighting the guy didnt have anything to do with the girl, but the fact that he was making threats to me and physically attacked me. Punching someone is considered assult and battery

3. Id say "get the f u c k away before you get jumped"

Thanks for the input though
 

snbatman

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Microphone Fiend said:
1. In the context of the club I thought it was alright

2. Fighting the guy didnt have anything to do with the girl, but the fact that he was making threats to me and physically attacked me. Punching someone is considered assult and battery

3. Id say "get the f u c k away before you get jumped"

Thanks for the input though
Re 1. Approaching anyone from behind is not the best way to go about things. From the side, is fine, they have a much better chance of seeing you and it doesn't come across nearly as threateningly. Plus, coming up behin a girl and sticking your crotch in their ass is just not cool, plus, as was pointed out, how would you react if that happened? Again, catch a girls eye, smile, walk or dance over so she can see you coming, and then you can lead toward the grinding as a natural continuation of dancing if the chemistry and IOI's are there.
 

d2j

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thats crazy what happend to you mate. Smash that guys face in. Anyway....congratulations on making this decision on getting as many girls as you can :up:

What im going to say now is a long bit of advice including an example of a recent successful approach of mine. Ive been seriously into this everyday for 3 -4 months now so heres my current outlook on girls and hopefully it can help you mate

If you really want to turn approaches into sex then you need to spark the sexual excitment and then increase it. A girl doesnt have to like you to have sex with you. I dont care if your approaching on the internet, at a bus stop, in a night club it doesnt matter your number one goal is to create attraction.. It is not to hope that if you keep saying general small talk like "hi" "where you going?" that she will be suddenly interested in you.

Ok thats enough theory for now ill give you an example of the last girl i approached at a bustop

Im sitting at a bustop text messaging and a HB8 about 19 years old comes walking over and sits in the bus stop. Its just me and her. I noticed she had a really expensive brand new mobile phone in her hand (the one i want:mad: ) and what look to be expensive earings

I acted busy and faced the complete opposite direction for 5 miniutes and then slightly turned my head and began the approach speaking slowly from my chest to get a lower tone:
Me: I dont usually talk to old ladies.. but i didnt realise nokia(the phone company) still made them phones anymore..its an antique..you could sell that for thousands
Her: *weird smile*..im not an old ladie and this phone is new actually!
Me: Ive got an idea you go sell it and make loads of money because you gotta understand you cant expect me to be your boyfriend if you can afford to buy me things
Her: *laughs hard* i didnt say i wanted you to be my bf! (permenant smile on her face now, shes looking right at me and her body changed to face me...so now i know its all going great)
Me: ohhh so you just sleep with every guy you meet on the first night *roll eyes and shake head as if shes a let down*
Her: *laughs and pokes my arm* shut up im a good girl!
Me: *turn all towards her ..slowly look her straight in the eyes* yeah right *turn back*
Her: *Laughs* i am! so whats your name?
Me: *look at her phone* arnt you supposed to put the number in first and then the name..oh i spose it is an old thing..i doubt it even dials out
Her: *laughs* you meenie
Me: 0777 *raise my eyebros as if to say write this in ur phone*
her: *laughs and types number* name?
Me: man of your dreams
her: *laughs hard* oh really now?
Me: yeah..really.. save it as that.*get up* oh yeah and your allowed to ring me at 9:30pm tonight *walked off*
Her: ohh ok bye then *sounding as if shes shocked i just left*

Decided i had to get out of their otherwise we could end up in small talk i walked back home and got a lift off my dad instead. This went perfect however their has been plenty of times when its gone wrong and the girl didnt have a sense of humour and ignored me or whatever but the point im making is stop small talking to these girls you find attractive. Saying something funny and then have it prescripted beforehand so you know roughly how your going to - increase the excitement..remember

You have to be confident enough to say anything to girls no matter what it is. One way i got confident was when me and my wingman (also best friend) used to go out and dare eachother to say the stupidest things for a joke and if you didnt do it you had to buy the other a drink.

The last thing ill say is when your out their approaching these beautiful girls remember the important thing is all this is about YOU. What they think say and do is their business not yours. Your business is getting girls into your bedroom at the quickest rate possible

Thats about everything ive learned so far and hopefully it helps and it wasnt a wate of time writing it all ;)

Good luck
 

Microphone Fiend

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Yo man thanks for dropping by. Personally I thought the opener was CORNY as hell, lol

you cant expect me to be your boyfriend if you can afford to buy me things
Her: *laughs hard* i didnt say i wanted you to be my bf! (permenant smile on her face now, shes looking right at me and her body changed to face me...so now i know its all going great)
Me: ohhh so you just sleep with every guy you meet on the first night *roll eyes and shake head as if shes a let down*
^^^^was money. The followup is great after the setup. Consider that stolen, and thanks again for dropping a line.


Havent been on the site for a while, my sis broke the internet connection and the harddrive was in the store... I havent done an approach since the incident. I actually saw the chick at the club the next day talking about it to them and looking at me. I made an action like "Man you really beat my ass :(" with my fist and mouth and just smiled and went back to the fellas. She over it and I'm pretty much back to normal, I guess it is just one of those in the moment things. She was trying to swing at me the first night, lol. But anyways, I've stayed busy for the most part but the times I've gone out I havent had the determination as much. Thats all gonna change though... I finish work on Sunday and then...well just keep an eye on my journal cuz s h i t is gonna pop off once I hit university....f u c k, its gonna start before university. I got a week before o-week starts, so Imma relax a day or two and then hit the mall and shop shoot the s h i t and sarge and i gonna hit up orientation to see what is new.

My conversation skills is better than ever in my life thanks to my summer job but it's a little rusty around the ladies because most of the time the people I talk to are old or taken at my job. I can be a lot friendlier and interested in what the person is saying so that helps
 

Microphone Fiend

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One new approach at a bus stop. Asked her a question, sold her a bus token, talked a bit more and then went our seperate ways on the bus. Felt so relaxed it was kinda weird. Going away tommorow...My clothing is packed and fresh 2 death so I cant wait to get there and start school again.
 

Microphone Fiend

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Wats up niggas? I got the computer back but no internet at my house. Im at a friends now, but tommorow Imma hit up the wireless @ school and post up some of my past approaches and sh!t. I see some new journals since ive last been here. Definetly nice to see. Keep it up everyone and lets go get some pvssy
 

Doggystyle

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Sorry memory is serving me **** at the moment, you where from lecestier right? i'm there in a couple of weeks! been a few times before, thought it was **** to be honest!
 

Microphone Fiend

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Approach #22
Went to the club. My wing is really dressed decent and Im doing alright too. We spot two Indian chicks, and we always seem to approach Indians when we go out cuz they always feeling us for some reason. Anyways, I let him pick which one he wants and I get the other. Lucky for me he picks the busted one, but he goes in first and my Hb is preoccupied with some other dude. He goes to the bar and I start chatting her up. Turns out she was 32 with two kids and is still in university. I don’t really give a fvck though, I get her laughing and smiling. After a couple minutes the dude that went to the bar comes back and gives her two drinks. One for her and one for her friend. (I know, wtf are you doing guy?) I take a step or two back and act disinterested. Then when he leaves I talk a little more and try and isolate.

Mic: Hey you’re pretty cool. I wanna know more about you…..but I can’t really hear you…Do you wanna go outside?
Her: Alright let me just give my friend her drink

Never thought isolating could be THAT easy. We go outside and she tells me how she has a man and he is the perfect specimen. She isn’t doing it in a bragging sense but in a im content with my life way. But I know if she was content she would be out at a club on a Friday night with me in the parking lot so I steal a page from MRSex4uNYC and start bf destroying subtly. She gets a little concerned later on how people are gonna start talking about how she is talking to me in a dark corner. I recommend that we go somewhere that noone can see her, but she declines, lol. Worth a shot though. We talk for a good 20 minutes or so, and then we head back inside. My wing is still dancing with his girl but he is not feeling her at all, lol. I roll around and look for new chicks. I see HB32 looking at me out the corner of her eye, but whatever I ignore that.

The club wraps up so me and my wing head outside to the parking lot and then we see a chick trying to tell her friend to make up her mind whether she is going home with this dude or not. Then she starts speaking all fast to her in Spanish. Me and my wing look at each other like “oh yeah giggity giggity giggity”…okay maybe not like that but we liked the accent. I say the first thing that comes to mind:

Approach #23
Mic Fiend: Hola Mamacita
HbSpanish: Hola (Smiles)
She starts talks to me briefly and then my wing more and sits down next to him. Apparently she saw him dancing with the busted chick and so he had social proof up the wazu and she was feeling him. I never feel like chasing a chick once she has picked who she wants or even hinted at it, so I was pretty much getting more and more indifferent. She was older than us, like 26 but we still was chatting her up. Him more than me cuz she was jocking him but I interacted with them a lil bit and then with her friend as she came into the conversation. He ends up getting the number and we eject.

Alright next it was orientation day. I see some black chicks next to a line, so I casually go in the line though I have no idea what it is for and they follow suit. I don’t talk to them for about 5 minutes and then after a while Im like **** it. I turn around and go:

Approach #24
Mic Fiend: Heeyyyyyyy…BLACK PEOPLE!!!
Them: *laughing* We were thinking the same thing when we saw you.

From there the conversation was wide open. When I open with something we have in common it really drops the b!tch shield. It works wonders. I shoot the breeze about whatever comes to mind, things to do in the city, music, whatever Yadda yadda yadda. We must have talked for about 20 minutes in the line. Anyways I get to the end of the line and then say

Mic Fiend: it was nice meeting yall…Oh wait do you have messenger?
Mic Fiend: (Double @ close)


Alright coming home on the bus. I see this fiiiinnneeee looking white girl, but something is different about her. She doesn’t look like she’s from that area. Im looking out the corner of my eye and she is glancing back. Noone is around so I say fvck it and think of an opener.

Approach #25
Mic Fiend: (She had on scrubs) Hey…do you work for the hospital?
HbScrub: (smiling) No…

You had to see her smile. Just soooo sexy, that’s when I realized she was like HB9 material and she wasn’t even black…I was like damn…She had this exotic look to her when you really look at her.

Mic Fiend: (After about 10 seconds)…Then what’s with the get up?
HbScrub: I clean houses from 7 to 7

Here Im thinking of every fricking cliché of a sexy maid sucking **** for money but I refrain myself from that, lol.

Mic Fiend: Oh…are you from around here?
HbScrub: No…I am from Columbia
Mic Fiend: Oh so you going work…?
HBScrub: No I just finished
Mic Fiend: Oh…
HbScrubs: So….Where are you going?

I was going home but I said the mall in hopes she was going there too and I could get more time to game her. She said something about the mall but I couldn’t understand with her accent. Talk a lil longer, get names and all of that stuff. Anyways I get off and we say our goodbyes. I shoulda tried and closed but no phone yet, whatever I coulda got an messenger address or something.
 

Microphone Fiend

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I go to the mall and just walk around and then Im waiting at one of the bus stops and these two chicks are giggling and looking in my direcetion. They looked a lil younger than me but that’s probably because lately every chick I’ve talked to is older than me. Anyways they are obviously checking me out and so I smile and wave and beckon them over.

Approach # 26
HBhair: No, you come over here…
Mic Fiend: Okay wait….How old are you girls?
2HBs: 17 and 18

Mic Fiend: (gets up)…Alright but...Im gonna need to see some ID before we go any further
HBs: (laugh) Alright but the only ID I got is this

She reaches in her purse and pulls out her school ID and I see a picture of a lil kid in her purse. RED FLAGS everywhere. I was gonna ask if the picture came with the wallet, but she says that is her son and he looks about 3 so she is definetly not a target anymore. I talk to them a lil more about the city, where they’re frome, etc, make em laugh and then my bus comes. It turns out they are going to go to a party and it is like 3pm in the afternoon. Not really quality chicks, lol.


HBwithKid: Hey, my friend wants your number…
Mic Fiend: I don’t have a phone plan yet….How bout I take yours?
Mic Fiend: (# closes)


After here, I got into a quasi-relationship with this chick I knew from a couple years ago so I took a lil hiatus but that fizzled out so I started up again. I'm walking around campus, I see this chick all by herself sittin on a bench. I walk by and get brief eye contact and continue about my way. I get to where Im going and Im like “fvck it. Lemme get back in the field” I walk back to where she is and say

Approach #27
Mic Fiend: Im waiting for the bus and I figured I might as well meet someone while I am waiting.
HBAfrica: yadda yadda yadda

We talk and stuff get her laughing though not as much as Id like. Anyways here’s where I slip up. I was just saying whatever to keep the conversation and I go:

Mic Fiend: So…how old are you?
HbAfrica: 23…and you
Mic Fiend: Er… 19. You looked younger from afar, lol.
HBAfrica: 19. You’re too young.
Mic Fiend: Too young for what?

Hb Africa replied something, but nothing sexual or anything cuz I woulda had a quick retort for that. I shouldn’t have brought the age thing up at all or at least not until I had more rapport with her. Anyways, the conversation slows down a bit after this and then I realize Im getting nowhere so I figure its time to eject.

Mic Fiend: Welll I gotta go catch my bus… See ya
HBAfrica: Bye
Mic Fiend: Oh….wait do you have messenger or anything like that?
HBAfrica: Nah. Well yes, but I don’t really use it that much. I don’t have the internet that much
Mic Fiend: Alright whatever, see ya.

Not an out and out rejection but whatever. If she really wanted it she woulda pushed for some other kinda close. I forgot her name during conversing with her and her face as soon as I got on the bus.

Things to work on:
-Less fluff and more getting where I need to get to
-Better phase shifting and going for the kiss when it is there, not settling for email addresses
-More approaches
 

Microphone Fiend

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Ramblings and Thoughts
One thing I really noticed is you need to cater yourself to your audience. Where I come from everyone dresses in the white tees and D!ckies or whatever Jeezy, Juelz or Juicy J wore in their last video. Since EVERYONE else dresses the same I like to have a more sophisticated look, kind of an R&B singer. However, When I am here in university no-one dresses like a ganksta so I can stand out and have more unique value by dressing in all the baggier, urban clothing, with style though (Think Lil Wayne meets Pharrell sans the silk shirts)I’m not wearing XXXL tees and $150 shoes with pants around my knees. Although, when I am in the university town but not on campus I dress more hood because the chicks are looking for a certain type of guy that they can brag to their friends about and in essence these girls are materialistic. I get cat whistles and “hey cuties” and alla that sh!t. So just personalize yourself to the people you are trying to attract. As long as you know who you are deep down, who cares what others portray you as.
 

SamePendo

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Imagine you run a lawyer office (whatever the name in english for that is). And you are hiring. And there comes this kid, looks real young, and says "im 15!" You go "oh crickey!" and if you continue to interview him, its out of mercy, no real interest. However, let's imagine that the kid doesn't give out his age even if you ask, turning the subject in a suave manner, and basically lets you know throught his presentation and interview that he is THE MAN!

And only when he sees that you have real interest in him, he says "oh, by the way, I'm 15" You won't give a damn, if its ilegal you'll find a way to turn around it, and make it legal, because you know that he's the man and no other guy is as cool as he is.

See where I'm going?

And why on f earth didn't you close the hot maid? I was tempted to give you a negative reputation for that! haha... anyways, keep up the good work.

:up:
 

Analytic

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Hey just checking out your Journal, you're pretty smooth man. You might come off as a player or something? I don't mean to stereotype but black guys usually gives the impression that hes a player so maybe being a little more gentlemently would help?

As long as you're out there, thats what counts though. Keep it up, I'll be following your progress closely.
 

Microphone Fiend

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Thanks for the feedback fellas, I really do appreciate it.

SamPendo: Thanks for the feed man, I've read stuff you've done in the field so I know you are a reputable source. Hope you drop more insight where you see fit.
Analytic: Wow, I dont know whether to feel flattered or like i am a generalization. LOL. Anyways, most of my successful pickups throughout my life seem to have been due to looking like a player or havin a decent amount of social proof. It definetly sends your confidence through the roof when ppl are hi-5'ing u and girls are runnin up 2 u, but then your demeanour really takes a hit when they arent around or someone is doing it to a friend of yours while you stand there.

Anyways I hit the club yesterday, veeerry out of state. I just ended up standing there and wanting to leave. I think Im going to take a break from clubbing or at least the PU aspect of it for a while. My day game is slacking and that is where I want to excel anyway because any and every Joe Blow tries to pull from the club after they've had a few drinks in them, and from my experiences the club is just a matter of who has the most social proof or the best dressed. The club requires a certain amount of undeniable confidence which I dont have on most nights. I have never been for the competitive aspect of picking up, so I do question why I have been clubbin so much in my life. Fvck, I just remember Im going clubbing tonight to check out this club spinning House. Alright, if tonight doesnt go well, then im gonna pack it up for a bit in terms of clubbing

Approach (Void)
Talked to a girl at the bus stop who turned out to be my neighbor to the house I just moved into. Not very long of a conversation (like literally 30 seconds before the bus came) So Im not gonna count it, but still putting in an effort


Things I've noticed
-There comes a time when the jokes and games have to stop and you need to escalate. If you stay trying to make them laugh it up when they want to be toungued down, you will slowly be losing value. If you are doing anything for too long you will lose value. I remember a saying from FS that says "Talk until its time not to talk." Seducing should be interactive in the way that you adjust yourself accordingly to your target.
- Jealous is a wasted emotion. If someone has what you want, study them and find out what you could implement into your life and disregard the rest.
- The theory is for future reference and so that people can see what kind of mindset I am forming. I read somewhere that if you think like a successful person (which I intend on becoming) then you can achieve similar results. If I ever recess into AFC-ism or get a brain transplant and forget everything I can look back at this
-These ramblings are great and all but I need more approaches to go along with my theorizing lol. One botched approach isnt worth all of this insight
 

Cpt Caveman

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d2j said:
thats crazy what happend to you mate. Smash that guys face in. Anyway....congratulations on making this decision on getting as many girls as you can :up:

What im going to say now is a long bit of advice including an example of a recent successful approach of mine. Ive been seriously into this everyday for 3 -4 months now so heres my current outlook on girls and hopefully it can help you mate

If you really want to turn approaches into sex then you need to spark the sexual excitment and then increase it. A girl doesnt have to like you to have sex with you. I dont care if your approaching on the internet, at a bus stop, in a night club it doesnt matter your number one goal is to create attraction.. It is not to hope that if you keep saying general small talk like "hi" "where you going?" that she will be suddenly interested in you.



Good luck
Exactly.

Microphone fiend, you need to start being more direct with your approaches. Read some gunwitch.
 

Microphone Fiend

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Alright. I heeded your advice and opened the Gunwitch word document I have had on my computer aeons ago...I must admit it helped a bit. Mostly just to stop hesitation and focus in on the moment more often. I was in a lil slump but the Gunwitch-esque mindset I got things started again

Approach #28
This took place last week Monday or Wednesday. Actually this was some girl quasi-approaching me. We are in lecture and she comes in late and sits next to me. After a couple minutes she makes some comment about the prof. Im no fool so I take this as her way of saying I like you. I run with the conversation, get behind on notes in lecture so I can borrow hers after class and then we talk and walk the hallways. I @close and then we end up making photocopies together. (Total Time: about 35 minutes)

Approach #29
This was actually today. After studyin for midterms I decided to take a break and hit the mall but before that I would hit the mini-mall. There is a sale rack on the outside of a store and I see a girl rumaging through the clothes. She gets to the rack and I pull out a shirt and ask her if it looks like a good fit. Looking back I could've done it with some women's clothings for a great opener. She had on a HS uniform, we talked for barely 1-2 minutes but I still had a decent amount of info on her. I walk away from this one, come back and then she leaves. Whatever, wasnt that interested, just trying to get back in the game. (Total Time: 1-2 minutes)

Approach #30
At the real mall. Waiting for the bus stop, im on the ground reading a book. This girl who is waiting for the bus stop is waiting for the bus too, and after a while she sits down. The first things that comes to mind is opening with "Hey you're on the ground too, I feel like a trendsetter" but I chickened out, and ended up opening with asking her what school she goes to, and talking about Profs and classes, you know the usual university garbage. This wasnt a great approach at all, but just felt nice to open chicks without caring again. We talked and then the bus came and I went ahead of her and never looked back and we sat in seperate places (Total time: 5-7 minutes)


Thoughts
I thought of this last week after the @close...@closes are for pussies and little boys. #closing is what sets you ahead of the galpals and homosexuals because it really sets the tone and is more personal. Striking while the iron is hot is essential in all aspects cuz I got burned recently by this and Im trying to recuperate atm. Always have a backup plan too :). One thing I reaaalllllyyyyy started noticed is your state leading up to approaching..Some days I can feel like nothing will come of it, and nothing ever does. Other times Im just more relaxed and just trying to stay alert for any opportunity. Those are my good days
 
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Fallen33

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Keep it up dude! I wish I had the time to get this many approaches in a day. I need to get out more I guess.
 

Microphone Fiend

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Yo Fallen33...wat up man, man I gotta catch you up in closing already, good stuff man. Im slackin in that department. Anyways went out last night, just havin some fun. Drunk a little so I was feeling nice so not really an epic night of sarging. When I drink a little too much I have trouble figuring out where I should be going in relation to the girl and tryin to fvck. I guess I should just work on the kino a bit more in retrospect, but conversation quickly widdles away.

Anyways the night starts with some houseparty with 5-6 girls and more than enough guys...sausage fest galore so we roll out n look 4 a club downtown. Funny sh!t actually, while waiting outside, the line swivels around the club which has a little outside patio. Anyways there is a gap between the fence and the building and I sneak thru there, paying is for suckers, lol.

Approach #31
Walking around and some bouncer dude "randomly" decides to stop me and card me, talking about random checks. He was about a 8 and I decided to engage him by acting indifferent and turning my body language. LOL. Im just playing. I was like yea man cool & I thougt he found out i snuck into the club at first. Im looking around and some chick at the bar sees and I get eye contact. I give her a look like "Can you believe this?!?!?!" and she laughs to herself. Once they leave she comes next to me and opens...We fluff for a bit, and then she turns her back to order a drink or something and I am sitting there thinkin of something to say that gets me closer to closing, and then she sees someone she knows and runs over there. Whatever, I leave that (Total Time: 2-3 minutes)

Approach #32
All my boys are ready to change venue but Ive been watching this girl dancing by herself all nite, so I finally work up the ballz to go up to her with
Mic Fiend: Hey...a black girl!!!........I thought you guys were extinct!!!

Lol, she was really laughin at that one, but I swear right after that I had to bounce with my ride... It sucks cuz with a good opener it really can start things off on the right foot.


So we go to this next club and the place is blah. There is one room which is like a sweatbox for dancing and another room that is for sitting off. I see one girl whose friends left her to dance. I roll up on her and say

Approach #33
Mic Fiend: Yo whats up? How come you sittin here on your own? (im thinking of throwing this opener away, I never intend on saying it, but when i see a girl by herself its the first thing that comes to my mouth. i think it subconsciously says "Yo...why are you such a loser you dont have any friends" or something of that nature...not so that she qualifies to me, but so that she thinks negatively)

Anyways we talk about random fluff, eventually I elicited her values on men and some of it was in line with what I am. It didnt feel like she was really vibing with me. She was an older girl by the looks of it, and they always seem to start me at a failing grade and I have 2 work my way into their good books. I chill with her and every now and then I get a phone call or my friends want to ask me something or another. At the end of the night she just says goodbye and walks away. She goes the same school as me and Ive seen her around, so Im not sure how Ill play this if we ever bump into each other again (Total time: 45 minutes)
 

specialed

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 18, 2005
Messages
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Location
milwaukee, wisconsin
if a girl is sending you closed answers...just walk away...literally

or you could be an ass and say..."alright ur wasting my time, bye"

either one is golden.
 
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