Mic. Fiend's 50 Approaches Journal - Feeback Wanted

[Microphone Fiend]

Been watching the latest approach journal's like Shyryder and Blackdragon and realized i need to get off my ass and start pushing myself. Approaching is obviously where it's at and they seem to be getting better real quick. Summer is approaching so I will have less commitments and more free time

Objective
Get #'s for my phone (Its pitiful I barely use my phone for anything)
get laid like no tommorow
Get to the point I approach first and then think later
Become a better DJ

Me Me Me!
-Black
-19 years old
-Skinny (but hitting the gym)
-Alright to look at.
-Enjoy meeting people but not the anxiety before the approach
-I wouldnt say Im a loner, but I dont need to have people around me

I noticed if I am not social interacting in some way often durin 1-2 week periods my social skills seem to drop. However, this year I might be working as a salesperson so I have potential to meet people all day long but the work week isnt 5 days a week so I will hit the malls and streets on off days. also like public transportation for meetin chicks. It is great, everyone shud try it :crackup:


Also I want feedback from u fellas, if u see something im doing wrong, could be doing better or whatever then fire away

 

[Microphone Fiend]

Approach #1
Walking to the bus stop I see a girl. Its like we both act like we arent looking at each other until we get close and then acknowledge each other when we get real close.
Me: Hi
Her: *head nods in a whatever manner*
Me: ....
Her: U know what time the bus comes?
Me: No....it should be here soon.
Her: Okay
Me: well I think so anyways, *laughs* Um...so how long you been here?
Her: At least 15 minutes
Me: *laughs*



Then the conversation died and its those time when both are you are looking out the corner of your eye. Im thinking those thoughts in my head like "Should I restart the convo or just ignore this chick?" She was like a thick 6 but she had a nice booty. Her face werent nfn special tho. Anyways the bus comes and I sit a couple seats away from her and that is the end of that. Not great but it kicks things off.

 

[flows101]

Nice to know more people are going out in to the field.
Not to bad for a 1st approach Microphone Fiend but i feel you could have done much better, know matter you still got loads of approaches left to do

 

[flows101]

Nice to know more people are going out in to the field.
Not to bad for a 1st approach Microphone Fiend but i feel you could have done much better, know matter you still got loads of approaches left to do

 

[OceanWindRider]

Hey, Fiend
I am gonna kick your ass now. Somebody should have done it long ago. It's long overdue!
You've got 1400 posts here and you still can't even approach and keep convo for more than 30 seconds??? :-O

Dude, you gotta stop hanging out on this and other web site and get out in field. I am glad you realize that now!
No amount of information gonna get you laid - only through practice and experience you can achieve that.
So... gauging your approach skills, I think you really need go through the bootcamp. I suggest you join one and make a commitment and stick to it!

You can see one starting right now http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?p=916987
In fact, I am going to post the week #1 task.
If you are smart and quick-thinking and can commit, you can still catch this train!

 

[Blackdragon5095]

I used to be a Keyboard jockey myself. Look for some of my old posts. These days I have a lot of knowledge but it's time to apply it.
It's not easy for everyone to get in the field.
10% of self-improvement is finding this site
30% of self-improvement is reading the DJ bible
70% of self-improvement is in the field

It takes some people time to get over their fears and others longer. In the end. If you ketp appoarching even if you mess up you being your path down the way of the DJ.

I'm glad I influence someone but Mic. You should start off appoarching girls and beat the fear of appoarching women. As of now I'm starting to like meeting new girls and look forward to meet more girls. The women come and go thinking is really digging deep in my head. I take less crap from girls and even have 1 attention wh0re chasing me ( she has a b/f but just wants my attention and she seems to like doing the work ). Mic I wish you good luck but like I said to other people doing field reports. ONLY YOU CAN BEAT YOUR FEARS, ONLY YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

This is 1 of my favorite quotes the got me out into the field.

Feeling real pain in order to change yourself for the better makes you a real man. And pain is always needed in the change for the better.
Running away from it gives us a false sense of security, while embracing it gives us sense of strenght, courage and freedom.

 

[Blackdragon5095]

Approach #1
Walking to the bus stop I see a girl. Its like we both act like we arent looking at each other until we get close and then acknowledge each other when we get real close.
Me: Hi
Her: *head nods in a whatever manner*
Me: ....
Her: U know what time the bus comes?
Me: No....it should be here soon.
Her: Okay
Me: well I think so anyways, *laughs* Um...so how long you been here?
Her: At least 15 minutes
Me: *laughs*



Then the conversation died and its those time when both are you are looking out the corner of your eye. Im thinking those thoughts in my head like "Should I restart the convo or just ignore this chick?" She was like a thick 6 but she had a nice booty. Her face werent nfn special tho. Anyways the bus comes and I sit a couple seats away from her and that is the end of that. Not great but it kicks things off.

Remember when talking to a girl you do 75% of the listenig and she dose 75% of the talking. Women love to talk about theirselfs. Also beware of body language too. Overall I look forward to reading more and why do 50 when you should do 100.

 

[Badmannaz]

Way to go mic fiend...no matter how many post you got...yea and shyryder is really setting the tone for field approaches..i was thinking of starting one but it won't start until the middle of the summer...im still in the gym trying to build my confidence

now for my man mic fiend i'm looking forward to his approaches because it looks like he's gonna be sarging primarily black chicks....and i must say odds are totally against you on this one...

this is all true by the way for majority of black chicks....
-Strong agressive attitude (very strong personal barriers)
-Queen like mentalities (will blow you off and feel nothing of it)
-and all around harder to talk too

But yea not all are like that...but i mean every 10 black chicks he's gonna come across i garuntee 5 or 6 are gonna have those characteristics...it's gonna take pure ballz and confidence to do this...:yes: :wave:

Good luck my man

 

[PrEcIsIoN22]

I'm on the verge of starting a journal of my own as well. 100 approaches will be the goal. Wanted to start since yesterday but my allergies are HORRIBLE!!! Soon enough. Anyways just wanted to say congrats on the first approach and I'll be following your journal as well.

 

[resilient]

You've been around for a while Mic. Fiend. Good luck with your approaches. What has been helping me is sarging with local PUAs once a week these last two months and going out and doing the DJ bootcamp excercises and chatting up everyone in sight.

I should be starting an approach journal myself after traveling this weekend to Juggler(mPUA)'s bootcamp. If I don't open up a thread here, I'll update my approach blog daily. It won't be your typical approach journal that's for sure. It's great to see DJs fieldtesting the knowledge already transcribed here. I think we're all supporting each other's improvement.

P.S. I stickied this thread, so I'll come back to visit and post often.

Sarge on :woo:
-R

 

[librito]

Remember when talking to a girl you do 75% of the listenig and she dose 75% of the talking. Women love to talk about theirselfs. Also beware of body language too. Overall I look forward to reading more and why do 50 when you should do 100.

I disagree with this statement.
it is very important to know that during the first 3 to 5 minutes you should be doing 90 percent of the talking and not the HB. but, you should not be hitting on her like most guys do. this will help you convey your personality and make her feel confortable with you.
then, you have to start to make her talk about herself and then and only then shell be talking most times and you should be listening.

 

[Blackdragon5095]

But if you start doing all the talking then she will be bored. I did that to 1 girl and she was bored as hell with me talking about myself. She bascially said, oh or yeah. When I make girls talk about theirselfs I got more then them just saying yeah or oh all the time. When she saying yeah while you are talking about yourself she thinking this.

Me: I got free car, I'm so lucky
girl: yeah ( oh ok..... )
me: I work out all the time and I love to watch movies
girl: mmmmm ( boring )
me: you should watch XXXX it's good and funny blah blah blah
girl: yeah ( I would rather kill myself then be stuck with this idoit )
me: blah blah blah
girl: well I have to go nice talking to you ( I'm gonna kill myself if I stay with you for 15 secs )

When I made the girl talk about herself it came much more fun and easier and she wasn't as bored. Now you librito, can start talking about yourself at first and do the following things.

1. Bored the $hit out of her. ( Hey at least, she can get more sleep and feel rested for work tommorrow )
2. Don't even have to ask for rejection you walk right in to it.
3. Make her wanna leave ( at least she wouldn't be trying to use you for your money )
4. Trying to impress her ( Good job she thinks your a nice guy, way to go junior )
5. Show that your selfish ( Well like they say, you should worry about yourself )

So it's not that bad talking about yourself when you first talk to her.

As for appoarching, women are appoarched all the time and want to be appoarched. Women spend alots of money on make up , clothes and hair to get appoarched. The truth is people think about theirselfs alot and spend alot of time thinking what they want to do.

When women use guys as emotional pool. They do it because they want to get stress off their chest and wants someone to listen to them. They know their jerk b/f or jerk e/x b/f won't listen or care so they go to the emotional pool nice guy because he will listen.

 

[Microphone Fiend]

sheeiiittt.... thanks to everyone for their input and advice.

Blackdragon and Libirto I agree with both of you. One one hand you have to maintain the convo because you are the confident initiator and she is not in state in the beginning so she is probably drawing a blank or not sure if she likes you, but on the other hand you have to keep the focus on her so that she feels compelled to join and will actually like what you are talking about

Badmannaz U cant think all that negative sh!t about black women if you want to succeed mayne. Think of them as being ready and willing to meet you. Last semester I approached this girl at a bus stop and was really hittin it off. She was fine and lite skinned and alla that good stuff. Come to find out that she does modelling and is on posters and internet sites. If I had good in thinknig she would be a b!tch and brush me off then I wouldnt have even tried. Sure there are those that are like that but that is because they are deeply insecure and that is the only way they feel powerful. Kinda like a kid who gets beat by his dad in turn and bullies small kids at school. When you realize the reason people act this way is because of insecurity then you see them in a whole new light and their namecalling and comments look more like a cry for help than an insult. I noticed the average girls who hangs out with better lookin girls do it a lot more than the dimes do.

OceanWindRider Thanks but no thanks. I've done the Bootcamp various times through out my tenure at SS. I've gotten something like 200 Hi's in total but I always burn out during week 3-4 so I feel like by starting at approaching I am bypassing all of the other stuff.

Everyone else I've read your input and I appreciate your feedback, thanks for the motivating words and alla dat good stuff. And yea, that was pretty sh!tty for a 1st approach. Guess I was just nervous for my 1st approach. Unfortunately I haven't had another approach. In fact i've barely had time to touch myself (just barely, lol) It is mostly because of my 9-7 job schedule (today is my first day off since last week thursday, saturday and sunday included). I have been gettin good at conversing through my job though. I have to sell myself and the products to the customer and they usually come in all timid and sh!t so I try and establish some rapport beforehand to get them on my side. It hasnt been many (any?) fine women there though but when the summer season kicks in hopefully the locals will come through. i should be going out wednesday afterwork so I plan to have SOMETHING to report on. But ya, I just didnt want anyone to think I've quit or died, just a slight setback but Im working around it.

 

[Microphone Fiend]

Man...Today sucked. It was ma 2nd day off (1st with good weather so I hit the streets looking for wimmen. I saw tons of dimes (all mostly older) but I couldnt muster the courage to approach cold on the street while they are walking the other direction. The negative thoughts get in my head and then approaching seems like the farthest thing possible. The day goes by and I get more and more discouraged. By the end I am ready to go home. Im on the bus and this girl who used to catch the bus with me before gets on. We never spoke but today she was glancin sideways and sh!t. I feel like I should've have approached her right there when she had nfn to do but I waited til she got off

Approach #2
It was pretty mundane actually. I had all of these funny openers in my head but i ended up just saying hi and going from there. I asked her what school she went to, does she know somebody, some more boring questions. I felt rushed cuz she was on her way home and we were goin seperate directions so I ended up asking asked her age and when she said 17 I smiled and walked away.

When the approached started I lost my cool and went on autopilot...Imma have to fix that next time. Imma go out wit di fellas tonite so fvck that weak ass approach.

 

[Blackdragon5095]

Whoa brother clam down man. You don't need funny or joke openers. A simple hi can do or asking a question and having the topic around her life. Relax man don't act like you gotta have pick up lines. Leave pick up lines to keyboard jockeys and newbies. Things you need a good opener.

Indirect (don't come off as hitting on her )
Smile ( warms her up too and tells if she a happy girl or unhappy girl )
Topic ( to talk about )
eye contact
good body language ( act like your listening and interest in what she saying)



Don't beat up on yourself when appoarching man. It's not that easy for me ethier.
Try the 3 second rule
And last thing.

I heard it before too. Black girls are rude. Those were raise by femenist mothers or mothers who are wh0res and teach their daughter to be that way are. If a girl acts rudely to you it's because she has problems or she fake.
I had girls act rudely to me. Don't let them make you feel unhappy or make you lose your smile.

Ketp the field reports coming man. You are on your way to becoming a Dj.

 

[Microphone Fiend]

Im on that Patron...so get like me.

Aite im back...its been 11 str8 days of work and makin paper, but i hit the club tonight (even tho i got work tommorow). The night was aite, i prefer a 1v1 approach with no one around so clubs are a hard spot for me. I talked to chicks after i got a lil buzz...

Approach #2
Mic: Hey how come u aint dancin?
Girl: My BOYFRIEND is getting me a drink at the bar
Mic: U got a boyfriend????
Her: Yea
Mic: Oh and thats the only guy u seeing???
Her: Yea
Mic: I got three, u need to keep up girl
Her: *laughs and playfully punches me*
Her: Oh here's my boyfriend now *gets up and starts dancin with dude*
Mic: .....

Then I get up and just smile to myself and shake my head...she thinks im smiling at her and she smiles back over her shoulder. I checked on her later a few times but the dude stayed on her


Approach #3
Mic: Hey how come u aint dancin? (If u cant tell i am approaching lone wolfs)
Her: *dirty look* Im tired
Mic: Already? From what?
Her: .....I was working all day
Mic: O really? Where to?
Her:....The mall...
Mic: *thinking that she is trying to be as general as possible because she thinks i care about her enuff 2 show up at her job*


And i ask a couple more questions and get more closed answers... It was just for practice really. I forgot her face after she was outta site...IT was like she didnt want me there but she didnt send me my marching orders... I felt like if i got in a gud line or somethin she wud crack but when i went to go back after a little thought she was dancin wit another nigga and then left.


Feels good to get some more under my belt...Hopefully more soon

 

[chickenlegs03]

...
Mic: I got three, u need to keep up girl
Her: *laughs and playfully punches me*

...seems like you had something going there for a sec. that was funny to read anyway.

keep it up man.

it really kicks ass to see all these approach journals popping up.

 

[Microphone Fiend]

arrrgghh. its been a while. I've been working everyday mostly but I still go out some nights. I've been slacking majorly, gettin too content. i stopped givin 100% at conversing at work either. im gettin back into the swing of things. Not staying focused was just a minor setback but Im back on course

 

[Microphone Fiend]

Alright went out last night. Lets get to it

Approach #5
Going into the club i realize i aint got money so I break off from my friends to walk to the ATM. Something like a 7-set of older women open me.

Woman 1: Leaving so soon?
Me: (while walkin) i gotta get my money...how yall ladies doin tonite?
Women: no reply
Women 2: *says something i cant remember that was just some average question*
Me: *Points to girl with t-shirt with maid of honor on it?* Damn, you guys got a maid of honor and everything


After this I feel ready to approach and I hear some fast footsteps approaching behind me. Like a woman in a hurry that doesnt want to be bothered

Approach #6
Me: Hey u just came from the bar right...Is it worth the cover charge
Her: Yea, but its pretty packed in there.
ME: oh really...How come you leaving
Her: *Muffled response as she walks by me* (It was either "I need money" or "I gotta pee". I saw her at the ATM later so probably the former...but the ATM did smell like pee pee)

Anyways I get to the club and after chillin for a while, my ole oneitis enters the club. I get away from her and focus on meeting new girls, or at least trying to. Funny stuff tho, me and my friend are sitting on stools trying to verbally stop girls as they walk sayin stuff like "Aye girl" "Yo shawty" but it werent working So i chillin on the stool when

Approach #7
Girl: Hey you got a lighter? (here Im thinking "Indirect opener from a chick, booyah")
Me: no....
Me...
Me...and smokings bad for u
Her: No its not.
Me: yes it is your gonna die, read the label
Her: *Backturns me*

Lol, I just froze up. It was pretty trashy conversation anyways. Not funny, just came off weird. Anyways fastforward about five minutes, my friend finds a credit card on the floor, and I reopen and ask if it is her. She says "no" but she got a hotter friend next to her so I open her

Approach #8
Me: is your name *reads name off of credit card*
Her: No
Her: With a name like that it could be anyone in this place. This is full of that mexicans
Me: Are you mexican?
Her: Yes
Me: Oh good, you dont sound as racist anymore.

blah blah, talked about finding the card some more. I think i went back to talking to my friend or something and she comes back like
Her: Im going, I hope you find whoever's card that is...bye

I Should've pressed harder on her. My mind wasnt clicking.


Then a five set walks by and out of nowhere, this butterbody (like a butterhead but reversed, lol) says:
Approach # 9
Butterbody: my feet are tired scoot over
Me: Alright but thats all the space you're getting
Her: *Blah blah blah cant remember what she said*

Then her friends start talking about leaving

Me: Leaving already? You just got here
Her: Yea but this place closes at 2
Me: Oh word, wat time is it
Her: It's time for you to get a watch
Me: Oh you got jokes...get the hell out of me seat *nudge her out of my booth with my butt*
Her: *Laughs*
Me: Ya but really, wat time is it
her: It is Ooooonnnneeeeee Fiffftttyyy (she's drunk)
Me: Oh really...yea thats a nice watch (feels up her arm)

Then her friends get her to leave

We get to a next club and there is a chick takin pics with a digital camera of her friend. I am behind her and say "U cant even see the pics" and she like "I know right..." and then doesnt reinitiate or even look at me. I didnt deem that worthy of an approach tho.


Nothing solid last night, just got back in the field. It didnt feel like it was game, just shots in the dark. When you say smooth sh!t u feel confident just thinking it, but last night wasnt smooth. The thing that sucked was bumping into the oneitis constantly throughout the nite and I felt like I had to look like a pimp, and she aint even see a nigga, lol. Just seeing her throws me outta frame. I know I dont love her or nfn, i had a chance and blew it. Just seeing her makes me regret not doin nothing

 

[Microphone Fiend]

had a whole day in the field today. I was feeling confident but I waited for the opportunity to knock instead of vice versa. Went to the gym at the end of the day and was alone in the weight room until some chick came in. I waited for a bit and was gettin ready to leave. I went to the changin room and said fvck it...Then I walked out and opened the chick

Approach #10
Mic: Hey...How long you been coming gym?
Her: Huh
Mic: Have you been coming to the gym long
Her: No, just since yesterday
Me: Oh I was tryina figure out some days 2 come where there is less ppl
Her: Oh so far I've only been coming in at this time
Me: Oh...well a word of advice dont try that door
Her: Y
Me: its a fire alarm and some dude set it off my 2nd day, lol. But ya....i gotta go, bye
Her: Alright bye

I need some more under my belt to stay natural I think. These are new situations for me, so I think by the time I've done it a couple of times I will have something better to say on the fly. Im a witty guy but lately when i approach girls I go into autopilot which is just keeping a convo going and relaying facts, not personality.