Your Longest No-Contact

[LiveFreeX]

My longest no-contact? Forever.

 

[Reykhel]

She ran into my cousin and he told her my marriage had ended. Here's the message she sent me:

Dear Des:

Its been nine years since we have spoken to each other. I have thought of you from time to time over the years, I could not contact you out of respect but I have always hoped that you were well and happy. I was pleased to hear of your successes in life, the birth of your son especially as I am a mother too and their is nothing in the world dearer to me then my boy, I am sure that you feel the same about yours. I really hope that this letter will not cause you any more distress, as we have been thru some very tough things together and apart. I like to think of all the many good times we had, I have so many fond memories of you, we were so young then...only kids. Sometimes it seems like it was in another life but then other times I can remember a simple funny conversation or a kind smile like it was yesterday.

You were the most unique,weird,witty,talented,just plain silly,tender, kind person I knew. their was soo much to love about you. I still have this video that you made for me for christmas one year. I think I was seventeen maybe... well it was just the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. I have a few pictures of us, you really were a handsome kid You know! And I still cry cry like a baby when I think of my cat...I really miss him! lol

My dear old friend...in these last few days I cannot stop thinking of you, my heart is aching for you, and I could not help myself from wanting to say just a few words in hopes that it may help you in some way. At times in my own life I have felt so much pain, so much uncertainty, I felt literally like their was no more strength left in my mind or body to pull through. but I have and I am happy. I have survived deceit, abuse, abandonment and loneliness. I have seen people I care for consumed by these things, which I find the most tragic of all...and some that have become stronger in spite of them. remember that you cannot control what other people do, we all have to walk our own paths in this life and we must live with the path we choose.

I know that it does not ease the pain of loss and their will be good days and bad, but if I am feeling down I only need look at the sweet smile, the little sparkle in my babies eyes and all of my worries seem to disappear, if only for a moment I feel rested. kids are amazing that way, their purity and love is so relieving, it is truly medicinal. I feel a great sense of purpose as a parent, to do the best that I can for him and it is so easy because all that he would ask of me is to sit with him and read a book, to explore everything and anything. Just to talk with him for little while, to be kind and loving.

Be hopeful that their are many good days yet to come, don't even doubt it, I knew you once upon a time and you are a strong person and you have a good heart! I am sure that you have many friends and family helping you out but if you ever need someone to talk to, as a friend or one parent to another, if you need anything at all please send a message or give me a call. I would be happy just to know that you are doing ok. If not, I would completely understand but please take care of yourself and the little one, you are a very special kind of person and you will be just fine in time.

Jesus H. Christ on a bicycle......after nine fvcking years

Don't be scared, be very scared...

My little weirdo finished her love letter by giving me unsolicited dietry advice......she had gone
gluten free and she listed all of the reasons why I should go gluten free too and on and on ...........

 

[El Payaso]

A year.

She ran into my cousin and he told her my marriage had ended. Here's the message she sent me:

Dear Des:

Its been nine years since we have spoken to each other. I have thought of you from time to time over the years, I could not contact you out of respect but I have always hoped that you were well and happy. I was pleased to hear of your successes in life, the birth of your son especially as I am a mother too and their is nothing in the world dearer to me then my boy, I am sure that you feel the same about yours. I really hope that this letter will not cause you any more distress, as we have been thru some very tough things together and apart. I like to think of all the many good times we had, I have so many fond memories of you, we were so young then...only kids. Sometimes it seems like it was in another life but then other times I can remember a simple funny conversation or a kind smile like it was yesterday.

You were the most unique,weird,witty,talented,just plain silly,tender, kind person I knew. their was soo much to love about you. I still have this video that you made for me for christmas one year. I think I was seventeen maybe... well it was just the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. I have a few pictures of us, you really were a handsome kid You know! And I still cry cry like a baby when I think of my cat...I really miss him! lol

My dear old friend...in these last few days I cannot stop thinking of you, my heart is aching for you, and I could not help myself from wanting to say just a few words in hopes that it may help you in some way. At times in my own life I have felt so much pain, so much uncertainty, I felt literally like their was no more strength left in my mind or body to pull through. but I have and I am happy. I have survived deceit, abuse, abandonment and loneliness. I have seen people I care for consumed by these things, which I find the most tragic of all...and some that have become stronger in spite of them. remember that you cannot control what other people do, we all have to walk our own paths in this life and we must live with the path we choose.

I know that it does not ease the pain of loss and their will be good days and bad, but if I am feeling down I only need look at the sweet smile, the little sparkle in my babies eyes and all of my worries seem to disappear, if only for a moment I feel rested. kids are amazing that way, their purity and love is so relieving, it is truly medicinal. I feel a great sense of purpose as a parent, to do the best that I can for him and it is so easy because all that he would ask of me is to sit with him and read a book, to explore everything and anything. Just to talk with him for little while, to be kind and loving.

Be hopeful that their are many good days yet to come, don't even doubt it, I knew you once upon a time and you are a strong person and you have a good heart! I am sure that you have many friends and family helping you out but if you ever need someone to talk to, as a friend or one parent to another, if you need anything at all please send a message or give me a call. I would be happy just to know that you are doing ok. If not, I would completely understand but please take care of yourself and the little one, you are a very special kind of person and you will be just fine in time.

Lol. Just another manipulative move. Delete and forget.

 

[Desdinova]

That is one ****ed up evil *****

That's the one who caused me to arrive on Sosuave

Delete and forget.

Naaah, that was too nice. String along, seduce, and then become exclusive with other women

 

[LogMeIn]

4 years and counting

 

[YawataNoKami]

10 years , last year she send me an email(my mom gave her my email address) , first one I did not answer , second one she send me 6-7 nudes and a very long (very long) message. She was married and she was pregnant. Five or six months pregnant , I don't know. Told her if she ever contact me again I will contact her husband , show him the mails and the pics.The end.............thank God.

 

[BlueAlpha1]

She ran into my cousin and he told her my marriage had ended. Here's the message she sent me:

Dear Des:

Its been nine years since we have spoken to each other. I have thought of you from time to time over the years, I could not contact you out of respect but I have always hoped that you were well and happy. I was pleased to hear of your successes in life, the birth of your son especially as I am a mother too and their is nothing in the world dearer to me then my boy, I am sure that you feel the same about yours. I really hope that this letter will not cause you any more distress, as we have been thru some very tough things together and apart. I like to think of all the many good times we had, I have so many fond memories of you, we were so young then...only kids. Sometimes it seems like it was in another life but then other times I can remember a simple funny conversation or a kind smile like it was yesterday.

You were the most unique,weird,witty,talented,just plain silly,tender, kind person I knew. their was soo much to love about you. I still have this video that you made for me for christmas one year. I think I was seventeen maybe... well it was just the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. I have a few pictures of us, you really were a handsome kid You know! And I still cry cry like a baby when I think of my cat...I really miss him! lol

My dear old friend...in these last few days I cannot stop thinking of you, my heart is aching for you, and I could not help myself from wanting to say just a few words in hopes that it may help you in some way. At times in my own life I have felt so much pain, so much uncertainty, I felt literally like their was no more strength left in my mind or body to pull through. but I have and I am happy. I have survived deceit, abuse, abandonment and loneliness. I have seen people I care for consumed by these things, which I find the most tragic of all...and some that have become stronger in spite of them. remember that you cannot control what other people do, we all have to walk our own paths in this life and we must live with the path we choose.

I know that it does not ease the pain of loss and their will be good days and bad, but if I am feeling down I only need look at the sweet smile, the little sparkle in my babies eyes and all of my worries seem to disappear, if only for a moment I feel rested. kids are amazing that way, their purity and love is so relieving, it is truly medicinal. I feel a great sense of purpose as a parent, to do the best that I can for him and it is so easy because all that he would ask of me is to sit with him and read a book, to explore everything and anything. Just to talk with him for little while, to be kind and loving.

Be hopeful that their are many good days yet to come, don't even doubt it, I knew you once upon a time and you are a strong person and you have a good heart! I am sure that you have many friends and family helping you out but if you ever need someone to talk to, as a friend or one parent to another, if you need anything at all please send a message or give me a call. I would be happy just to know that you are doing ok. If not, I would completely understand but please take care of yourself and the little one, you are a very special kind of person and you will be just fine in time.

I shudder when I read this. I don't know the extent of madness this woman caused you, but she has all of the telltale signs of our former BPD's - so I can only imagine. The tone of this letter reminds me of those old exorcism movies where during an exorcism a demon assumes the voice of a loved one to draw you in, only to laugh maniacally after catching the vulnerability in your eyes. That woman wanted to see you that night, have mind-blowing sex, have some pillow-talk about "second chances", and then destroy you.

This brings me to my contribution to this thread. Longest no contact is currently sitting at 6-7 months. I was on & off again for 4 years. Hot/cold, some great memories, cheating, and nearly 50 breakups. During winter 2013 we went through one stretch of 2.5 months before I received a hand-written letter myself. I never read that thing. I either threw it out or it's buried in a relative's messy basement somewhere. Sometime shortly after we reconnected and it was never mentioned. We did our thing for another 18 months, but the clock struck midnight in summer of 2015. She disappeared some time around June or July, and there are no signs of life since.

I still think about her, and wonder if she'll ever try again. The satisfaction that would come from finally taking a last stand of my own would be very gratifying.

 

[Bingo-Player]

generally once ive got them hooked doesnt matter the scenario they cant last much more than a week before they need their fix

although one plate is currently pushing that limit although her interest level was questionable to begin with

 

[AttackFormation]

10 years , last year she send me an email(my mom gave her my email address) , first one I did not answer , second one she send me 6-7 nudes and a very long (very long) message. She was married and she was pregnant. Five or six months pregnant , I don't know. Told her if she ever contact me again I will contact her husband , show him the mails and the pics.The end.............thank God.

That is truly fvcked up... what was her new man like?

These kinds of things are what really turn me off to taking relationships with women with the slightest emotional investment. Come to think of it, even my own mother did something like the things you guys are listing here according to my father (who she divorced) during a 3 year period she was separated from her new husband.

 

[YawataNoKami]

That is truly fvcked up... what was her new man like?

These kinds of things are what really turn me off to taking relationships with women with the slightest emotional investment. Come to think of it, even my own mother did something like the things you guys are listing here according to my father (who she divorced) during a 3 year period she was separated from her new husband.

Most people forget , mothers are also women. And grandchildren rabies is as strong as baby rabies.

 

[GS750]

She never went more than a week or two without re-initiating contact, even after I made it clear that I didn't want to be in contact with her. I finally blocked her number. It's been almost a year and I intend to keep NC forever.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

That's the one who caused me to arrive on Sosuave



Naaah, that was too nice. String along, seduce, and then become exclusive with other women

Have you ever contacted her since?

 

[RangerMIke]

I honestly don't know.... months I suppose. Truth is that when I walk away from women I just flush them completely and pretend they never existed. Sometimes when women reach back out to me I have to try and remember who they are.

 

[Desdinova]

Have you ever contacted her since?

I have! We've hung out off and on for the past five years. I used everything I knew to make her attracted to me again. It worked very well. Three times I ended up in LTRs with other women which pissed her off. Every time the LTR ends, she comes back.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

I have! We've hung out off and on for the past five years. I used everything I knew to make her attracted to me again. It worked very well. Three times I ended up in LTRs with other women which pissed her off. Every time the LTR ends, she comes back.

Sweet, so it seems you can come back to a oneitis once you've become strong enough to. Or smart enough at least.

This might be a bit personal, but did she originally break it off with you or you her? And if she was the one, was it because of you (like you became a 'nice guy' etc.) or because she was crazy or something like that?

 

[Desdinova]

did she originally break it off with you or you her? And if she was the one, was it because of you (like you became a 'nice guy' etc.) or because she was crazy or something like that?

We were actually engaged. She ended the relationship because I was an AFC. She told me "I need to do things for myself" and "I need to find myself" and "I don't want to be with anybody right now" and there's probably a few other typical responses in there. I was so lost and confused that I hit the internet and started looking for dating advice. I wound up here.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

We were actually engaged. She ended the relationship because I was an AFC. She told me "I need to do things for myself" and "I need to find myself" and "I don't want to be with anybody right now" and there's probably a few other typical responses in there. I was so lost and confused that I hit the internet and started looking for dating advice. I wound up here.

Awww man, that sucks. Wish your fairytale came true to be honest, it's good to be hopeful that things can end heppily ever after sometimes...

If she didn't seem like a nutcase before, maybe she is a good person inside. Perhaps another shot with her if she and you really seem to want to try again. But that's up to you to decide for though, I won't say anything else.
Anyway, thanks for sharing Des.

 

[Desdinova]

If she didn't seem like a nutcase before, maybe she is a good person inside. Perhaps another shot with her if she and you really seem to want to try again. But that's up to you to decide for though, I won't say anything else.

No, she's a nutcase. Everyone wondered how the hell I put up with her for 4 years. Looking back, I wouldn't be able to tolerate her 5hit now.

 

[grayclif]

I guess I should give mine... 8 years - the woman who drove me here contacted me just days after I ended my marriage

Did she say if she found out about your divorce before she contacted you.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

No, she's a nutcase. Everyone wondered how the hell I put up with her for 4 years. Looking back, I wouldn't be able to tolerate her 5hit now.

well in that case, nvm then haha.