Your beloved Falcon is now giving dating a shot. He needs your help.

[Falcon25]

I have no problems laying women. In fact, I'm tired of it. It's getting old cause I don't dig most of them. I can sleep with women even though I live with family. Even though I'm broke. Never been a problem, never will be. But, I haven't had a "steady" girlfriend since the George W. Bush first administration. I would like to have a girlfriend. Especially now that it's getting cold and I want some presents for the holidays. I usually get so much puvsy that I have to get checked for STD's every two weeks.

But, now I am seeing this woman for the last four weeks. It's relatively new field for me. She is kinda growing on me. When I first met her, I thought she was retarded, but now, I think she's a cool cat. She seems to have her **** together, she's a strong girl. Works hard and has her guard up. Doesn't seem to be a sluvt but I can tell she wants anal. I dig this girl. But I have no clue on how to become "boyfriend" of her's.

My questions are (keep in mind that I want an LTR, not just sex). I want to hold up on sex for now (everytime I have sex with a woman early, it lasts a few months then it's done).

How often do you call a girl you have been intimate (but no sex) with? Once every two days? Once a week?( Went on about four or five dates now).

Where do you guys usually take someone you are interested in long term?

How often do you see each other?

Any other tips to creating attraction FOR THE LONG TERM????

Any ideas can help. I don't want to lose this girl so I'm putting all the other girls on the back burner for now. I don't want her to think I'm getting puvsy from elsewhere. The other day she calls me a player. She said that she thinks I may be dating like six or seven girls. I told her that six or seven girls WANT to date me, but doesn't mean they have my attention. I also told her that it's more like twenty to twenty three girls.

She seems old fashioned (I like that). Any advice?

 

[runner83]

I can see where you're coming from.

Most girls/women in my experience tend to lead pretty boring lives and eventually you find one that you think may be different.

No advice I can offer since I s*ck in this area, except to say the one time I started to think this way (like you are starting to) and went along with what she thought she wanted against my better judgment it all went wrong.

You seem experienced enough though, so hope it all goes well. Make sure you keep control of the situation and let us know how you go.

Another positive story on how an LTR can work would be appreciated, since they seem to be in pretty short supply.

 

[squirrels]

I've been single all my life.

All I can tell you is...you CAN'T FORCE IT to happen if it's not happening on its own. Girls will naturally start to gravitate more or less toward you if the "relationship" is happening.

What I mean by that is that if you want to be with her regularly, you start to develop patterns...things you like to do together, or times that you expect to hang out. "Setting up dates" becomes easy...you call her up, she expects you to call, you invite her to hang out, she says yes, and you expect her to say yes. Your schedules start to "integrate", meaning you know when each other are busy and find/make time to be together.

Try to establish one or two "regular things" you do together every week. For example, one of the girls I'm dating right now is an Eagles fan, so if that game isn't the same time as my Ravens, I try to make time to watch with her then. In fact, I've even had to make up an excuse NOT to watch to avoid seeming like we're falling into a "dating pattern".

That, and invite her to things you wouldn't invite an "everyday" to. Have her be your guest to a wedding. Take her on a trip somewhere. Introduce her to some of your hobbies and see if she has any interest. Get involved in her things and do something for her once in a while out of the "goodness of your heart"...i.e. "I bet xxxx would get a kick out of it if I did yyyy" Bring her into situations where she meets your family and friends. (the last one I'd save for later, but that's just me)

This is by no means saying, "become boring/mundane/routine". Always be varying it up. Just establish SOME kind of routine for her to base a relationship on, so when she thinks of you, it's not just a string of random dates. Formulate your own inside jokes and use them all the time, so when she gets in certain situations when you're NOT there, she thinks of those little sayings you have and thinks of you.

Here's the catch...all you can do is create the dreamworld and allow her subconscious to fill it. You can't insert ideas into her head without her recognizing that their origin is foreign (i.e. YOU put them there). You have to let her come up with the idea on her own. And if she doesn't, then chances are she doesn't want to be with you anyway. And there's not much you can do about that. You lead, she follows. If she doesn't follow, you can't drag her there. If she comes to the water and doesn't want to drink...well you get the metaphor.

This is where a lot of guys don't "get" the game. They think they're using the "DJ skillset" to MAKE a girl sleep with them. The truth is that the girl wanted to f**k in the first place...the so-called "DJ skills" simply set up the environment and the girl's mindset to allow her to do what she naturally wanted to do ANYWAY.

Yet they think, "I MADE this girl sleep with me...now I can MAKE her want to be in a relationship with me". It just doesn't work that way. What a man can do is elicit and take advantage of those desires that a woman already has, some by nature, some by nurture over time. What he CAN'T do is create new desires in her...except maybe over a LONG period of time by LOTS of suggestion, often USING the relationship to build those desires, instead of building the relationship itself.

That's all I've got. Enjoy.

PS - You know what really p!sses me off?? When people think that the meaning of "relationship" just means you're "not f**king anyone else". That is why so many relationships FAIL these days...because they're based on the notion of sexual exclusivity, of OWNERSHIP of the other person's genitals, rather than actually enjoying the other person's company.

Don't fall into this trap...if she's that good, you'll WANT to spend time with her even doing NON-sexual things rather than doing sexual things with the other 20something girls. That's when you know you want a commited thing, NOT when your favorite girl starts withholding the p*ssy pending a commitment. Do what you want, though.