"you talk too much about other girls"

[slaog]

Thats what a girl told me tonight... it was an online conversation. She went on to say "it looks like I'm going to have another male friend, why you - men are always making this mistake".

She is into me and have admitted she was testing me the other day which I passed (thanks sosuave!)..

So whats the best thing to do in these circumstances? Talk about other women to show them you've other options or say nothing?

 

[slaog]

So whats the best thing to do in these circumstances? Talk about other women to show them you've other options or say nothing?

Anybody been in a similar situation? Does it make them jealous or just see you as higher value?

 

[Warrior74]

Why are you talking about other girls? Why aren't you talking about her? I only talk about other girls to girls I want to keep in the friendzone (fat chicks or coworkers). She told you what the deal was. You killed her interest. If you are a great guy...they assume other girls are after you. If you are telling her about it, its like rubbing it in her face that you don't want her like you want other girls. Subtlety is the name of the game. Let your actions speak more than your words.

 

[wjh]

+1 for subtlety

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Why are you talking about other girls? Why aren't you talking about her? I only talk about other girls to girls I want to keep in the friendzone (fat chicks or coworkers). She told you what the deal was. You killed her interest. If you are a great guy...they assume other girls are after you. If you are telling her about it, its like rubbing it in her face that you don't want her like you want other girls. Subtlety is the name of the game. Let your actions speak more than your words.

I'm guessing it's just another occasion of a guy pushing the "I'm the prize" concept way too far. "Oh look at all of the women I'm talking to who are interested in me..." Way too much detail. Just being busy and not always being readily available is enough to subtly convey that you have "other things" going on in your life.

 

[Warrior74]

I'm guessing it's just another occasion of a guy pushing the "I'm the prize" concept way too far. "Oh look at all of the women I'm talking to who are interested in me..." Way too much detail. Just being busy and not always being readily available is enough to subtly convey that you have "other things" going on in your life.

I learned this lesson from a female. She was my starter girl when I became single. She was chunky but sexy and when we broke up we were still involved in several business ventures together. She would VERY often try and tell me about all the other guys that are interested in her...as if to make me jealous. But I didn't want her so it didn't bother me. In return I would tell her about all the guys checking her out and how she should hook up with them. Eventually she got the point and we settled into just being friends.

She always accused me of being a player, or she would call me a male slut because I never gave her all of my time when we were dating. Usually I was at the gym or resting or working on my other projects, but I never shared that info with her. I just would tell her I've been busy or working. She would always ask about my weekends. I'd give her a one or two line response. 'It was good.' or 'Hung out with my friends'. She knew about my past being a Club dj and promoter, she would see pictures of me on myspace with other girls. I just never got in the habit of explaining myself to her.

After two months she told me she loved me and how it was crazy being with me. At 3 months she demanded that I be her boyfriend. When I refused she had some other guy over the next night and made sure to tell me about it. I just withdrew my attention and sarged other girls. She's still dating that guy..but she's tried to have sex with me on several occasions. She always tells me that he's not half the man I am.

She gives me all sorts of details about their life. I give her hardly any about mine, I talk more about my life on this site than I do to people I know. She always ask am I still out there whooring it up. lol. Of course I don't anwser the way she wants. I usually just smile.


When you give them only a little it goes so much farther than when you give them alot.

 

[Aktat]

Talk about HER, not other girls. And tell her about yourself!! It will do the trick .

 

[Effington]

Great post, warrior. Just shows how people work. When you leave things up to their imagination, it will go wild. Kind of like how the sexiest girls aren't the ones that wear the least clothing.

 

[ready123]

She would VERY often try and tell me about all the other guys that are interested in her...as if to make me jealous

seen this too and it ends up being a turnoff. and the reason why it doesn't work for guys or girls is because all that prize talk is just another way of qualifying yourself

AKA trying to impress the other person

 

[WC2]

Being seen with other women and actually doing things with other women do a lot more than words can ever do. Dropping a line about another woman while talking to one is OKAY once in awhile. Once you start taking it overboard, you're obviously trying to makeup for women that aren't really there.

 

[slaog]

Thanks for the responses. I get it now although it is on a dating site and I was only talking about a past date that I had. In future I'll wait till they ask about it.