You must kiss close the first date

[DonJuanabe]

Competition. You are competing against any number of other guys. Sure, maybe it's 0. But maybe it's 1. Or 10. Or 100. You don't know. All you know is that women are approached constantly. Maybe the one you like has been approached. Maybe she will be tomorrow.

So you have a first date and it goes well. If you don't kiss close she will feel that you are not quite as assertive as she hoped. Or maybe she thinks you're not as interested in her as she hoped. What happens if, tomorrow, she has a first date with someone else and he kiss closes her? She thinks of him in higher regard than she does you. Or that he is interested and you aren't. Once she makes the emotional choice of him over you it is going to be an uphill battle for you.

Don't put yourself in that position. Kiss close. Kiss close. Kiss close. If you like the girl then you want to kiss her, right? Well, then why aren't you kiss closing? Because you're not sure if she wants you to do that? If she didn't run away or get into her car and slam the door shut on you she wants you to kiss close her.

Kiss close every first date. Actually, kiss close every date.

 

[Toast123]

As an Israeli of African descent it is important you, herself and even YOU READER understand the urgency involved. No, there is no price and NO there is no real rule but know this.

It comes. It comes without a letterhead or banner. When it does then the feet tell the legs that tell the knees etc etc all the way to the MIND which does what ever man should do. And do it you shall. Otherwise what I said about price? Well. Then they have it.

Concerned of course, kiss is like a physical confirmation of what you both know is there, tension beyond boundries minds and instincts the flows through the moments and grips your every word as you create a foundation for a very long thought process. Trust me, they've got it.

 

[pdx1138]

Disagree....because most of us would be too focused on that outcome and could lead to a fail.

I've banged plenty I didn't kiss close on the first date.
If the moment arrives, of course go for it, but I'm not going to just do it for the sake of it.

 

[Zerro]

Disagree....because most of us would be too focused on that outcome and could lead to a fail.

I've banged plenty I didn't kiss close on the first date.
If the moment arrives, of course go for it, but I'm not going to just do it for the sake of it.

Agreed. The chick I've been banging for the last few months I didn't kiss until date #3. Do it when the moment presents itself, don't try to force the moment.

 

[EastWind]

This is totally wrong and even detrimental to beginners because it puts any amount of inadequate pressure on them.

If you truly are a "prize", as the word is around here, it won't bloody matter if you kiss her on the first date. I'm not going to advance any theories about whether it makes her wonder why you didn't kiss her blah blah blah (stop overanalyzing.)

"Being the prize" is not something that you can convey using specific keywords when talking to her or by running a funny little palm-reading game on her. It's something that you are, that you have become through your hard work on yourself. When you truly are that man, you will be glad of the woman who lose interest because you did not kiss her on the first date: she has shown her hand, she is a low-quality woman, she is weeding herself out.

Of course, if your strategy is "sex that night or out", then you should probably try to kiss her... but that is not what you are talking about.

Seriously, I have to say it once more: that kind of thinking is highly detrimental to one's game. It puts unnecessary pressure and will probably lead to negative results for 95% of "beginners" or "inexperienced men".

 

[Mike32ct]

It's not so much the kiss per se, but it's how she acts when it's time for a good night kiss. If she walks fast to her car and/or leaves 20 feet between you, scratch her off your "To Do" list.

But if she lingers close to you, then definitely go for the kiss.

How the actual date goes means nothing. The best indicator is how she acts when its time for an end of first date kiss.

Lauging and good conversation during the date doesn't mean jack. ALWAYS pay close attention to how she acts when she's walking out to her car.

 

[Rubirosa]

Lauging and good conversation during the date doesn't mean jack. ALWAYS pay close attention to how she acts when she's walking out to her car.

Y'know, I've never taken this into consideration, but in retrospect, you're exactly right !!! Good point

 

[Renegade357]

That's not standard operating procedure. Much safer not to kiss on the first date and let the girl wonder where she stands with you. Kissing on the first date is a very advanced move I've pulled off a few times but only when I knew I had it in the bag and felt like doing it.

 

[Mike32ct]

I'm not necessarily disagreeing Renegade.

You certainly can avoid kissing her on the first date and possibly even increase attraction that way.

My point is "See if she lingers and looks you in the eyes after the date."

At that point, you could go for it and kiss her OR give her a little ****y grin, not kiss her, and say "Have a good night."

But if she doesn't linger and keeps lots of distance and/or hurries to her car, it's over. She's not attracted to you. No matter how much fun she had on the date (ie smiling, laughing, joking, long conversation), you are in friendzone at best. But it's not because you did or didn't kiss her. It was mostly about you not being her type lookswise. If you attempted the kiss anyway, you'd get her cheek.

 

[youngmack]

So what are the signs even the smallest that convey to you that she WANTS to kiss you (in detail)?I am bad at noticing signs mainly because i dont know what they are.

 

[Mike32ct]

Youngmack:

She looks you in the eyes, has her face close to yours, and she might even STOP talking while continuing to look in your eyes.

She's looking at you, but the pause in her conversation suggests she's waiting for something. In this case, she's waiting for a kiss.

But this is only with good eye contact, being close by, etc.

If she just stops talking while seated across from you on a date and doesn't look at you, then she's bored or uninterested. Don't lean across the booth at T G I Fr id ays and try to kiss her anyway lol. Just kidding.

 

[Trump]

Don't put yourself in that position. Kiss close. Kiss close. Kiss close. If you like the girl then you want to kiss her, right? Well, then why aren't you kiss closing? Because you're not sure if she wants you to do that? If she didn't run away or get into her car and slam the door shut on you she wants you to kiss close her.

Kiss close every first date. Actually, kiss close every date.

She could still kiss close you and refuse a second date.

One issue with this site is everyone is outcome dependant. They think they have to hit the jackpot or score all the time in every case. As long as you make sure she enjoys herself, feels safe and has a good time, the rest will take care of itself. Granted you can't go out on several dates and not escalate, but one date and no kiss close doesn't mean much. It's all relative.

 

[bigneil]

A succesful seducer makes his romantic interest known right away (Louis/Copeland).

That said, if you are not interested or available, your not trying may increase her interest, but don't leave anything to chance.

IMO you must kiss close before you even ask for her number.

Ask her out face-to-face and say "prove it" and make her kiss you (but no tongue for the love of God). Then get her number.

That said, Doc Love had it best when he said you must hit on 3 of the following 4 to call it a good date:

1) She makes future plans together.
2) She touches you.
3) She compliments you.
4) She gives you a nice kiss at the end of the date.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Too much keyboard jockeying here.

I have went several dates without a kiss close. I ended up having sex on all occasions. If she likes you, it doesn't matter.

 

[Uberguy]

Rule #1: There are no rules.

Seriously, the best ****-snatching partner I ever had was someone I didn't kiss until the fourth date. Similarly, there are girls I've kissed on the first date that weren't that interested. Each person is unique. So too should be your approach.

 

[DonJuanabe]

Kissing the girl tells her in no uncertain terms where your interests are and that you are confident and assertive enough to go after them. If she agrees to a second date after a kiss close first date you know that she knows that this is not a friendship type thing and that she expects a second kiss.

If you don't kiss close the first date she might still agree to a second date because it was fun in a friendship type manner. Women do that all the time. If you made out with her on the first date she knows you're going to at least make out a second time, perhaps escalate.

Another point of the kiss close is that if you have competition you are in the pool of guys who kissed her rather than the pool of guys that didn't kiss her. This is especially true with the popularity of internet dating -- girls get many more dates than they did ten years ago. If she likes you this matters. If she isn't sure because there are multiple guys it matters even more because women respect assertive men more than non-assertive ones.

Do you HAVE to kiss close? Of course not. But don't fool yourself -- if you like a girl and don't kiss close it's because you think it takes balls the size of a basketball and all you have is a ping pong ball. You lacked confidence. You took the easy way out which is to do nothing. You needed the first date to gain the confidence to try it on the second date. Don't rationalize shyt about it. It wasn't because it didn't "feel" right. It wasn't because you were showing control. It was because you wussed out. Own up to being a wuss. Embrace your wussdom.

What I keep trying to emphasize is that you kiss her because you want to kiss her, which is why you asked her out. It shouldn't take confidence -- if she agreed to go out with you she knows you want to kiss her, heck, bang her. Women are not stupid; guys don't take them out to pass the time because there is nothing else to do. They take them out in order to play the game of legal prostitution.

Signs a girl wants you to kiss her? Many, such as: her facing you directly; lingering; looking into your eyes; talking nonsense as though she is stalling; allowing you to stand close to her without moving back.

But there is an easier way to approach this. Don't wonder whether she wants you to kiss her. The presumption should be that she does want you to kiss her. Simply ask is she doing anything that overtly prevents you from kissing her, such as getting into her car and closing the door, or saying thanks and walking away from you toward the subway, or facing away from you so that you really can't kiss her on the lips. This is a better way of approaching the situation because it will be much more obvious and your presumption should be that she wants you to kiss her. If that is the presumption don't wonder whether she wants you to -- you know she does unless she shows you otherwise.

Finally, there is one way and only one way to get comfortable kiss closing a first date. Doing it. Doing it again. And again. When you kiss close three first dates you will find it becomes natural, but the point is you have to actually do it. Is it going to scare you? Maybe, but to overcome your fear (which to be honest is irrational since nothing bad will happen if you go for the kiss anyway) you have to go for the kiss. It's that simple.

 

[Sneevox]

Competition. You are competing against any number of other guys. Sure, maybe it's 0. But maybe it's 1. Or 10. Or 100. You don't know. All you know is that women are approached constantly. Maybe the one you like has been approached. Maybe she will be tomorrow.

You are competing against any number of other guys.

This made my stomach hurt reading.

You've got it all wrong, friend. You're the catch. The ladies are competing for you. Being eager to kiss means you have very little options. If you act interested, yet indifferent, they'll wonder why you didn't kiss them.
If you are truly a Don Juan, you will give off that feel that tells them that you truly don't care, and that you're not kissing them NOT BECAUSE YOU'RE SCARED, but because you are still testing her.

What I keep trying to emphasize is that you kiss her because you want to kiss her, which is why you asked her out.

It seems like you've already determined that these girls are worthy of you before you even truly met them.

Are you sure you're truly a Prince Charming?

 

[bigneil]

If things are going well enough, she will kiss you.

Then you can say "I thought you said you didn't kiss on the first date!"

And she'll say "I was only saying that..."

(Never listen to what she says, only what she does - it works both ways).

 

[Burroughs]

I go for the jerkkoff close myself

whip it out and splooge on her face

if she smiles and says mmmmmmm she likes you :crackup:

 

[Sneevox]

If things are going well enough, she will kiss you.

Then you can say "I thought you said you didn't kiss on the first date!"

And she'll say "I was only saying that..."

(Never listen to what she says, only what she does - it works both ways).

I don't agree with this.

Personally, I never allow the girl to kiss me. I kiss her. I just don't like the idea of her controlling when she gets that kind of stuff.

I don't like to assume I like a girl for a LONG time.