"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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WTF, The Ex keeps calling.

KEddie

Don Juan
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About 2 years ago, I dated this girl for like a month. Then we broke up badly, and I didn't talk to her for like 8 or 9 months. and then over the summer I decided to stop being so bitter about the whole thing, and we became friends again, Not as good friends as we were before we went out, but back on speaking terms.

So then I graduated, and once in a blue moon she'd IM me and we'd talk for a bit. Then she finally got a new boyfriend,who she is still with, and apparently REALLY likes alot.

A few months ago we were talking and she apologised for being such a B**ch when we broke up, and it actually made me forgive her ina sense, not that I really cared anymore.

Which brings us to the present. She drunk dials me every so often, but I've only answered once or twice. And she's constsntly asking when I'm going to move back down to where we went to school. And today she called me on her way home just to talk, and we ended up talking for the longest time we ever did on the phone which I found weird.

So I guess my question is why would she call me and IM me etc. when she has a boyfriend who it seems she should be calling instead? I mean other than my name appearing in her phone book before her boyfriend's I think she's confused as to what/who she wants. Basically I just wants some other DJ takes on the situation.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Rondavu

Don Juan
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She wants to bang you on occassion, or wants to extract emotional support. Who knows which, but those times she calls you are the times she allows her instinct to guide her actions. Deep inside she desires that connection with you again on whatever level she's missing now, although she may be too crazy to deal with it reasonably.

Most of the time when chicks do these types of things, they are seeking something that they're missing. Maybe her man gives it to her good enough, but she doesn't get that emotional support. Maybe vice versa. Whatever it is, some women fantasize about the grass on the other side, and how it has all the green relationship elements they desire. Truth is no one has ALL the elements a person desires. Mostly you seek out a mate with quite a few of your favorite elements.

Bottom line is you should think about what you want, and if it's her then proactively pursue it or tell her to stop calling you. My advice is tell her to beat it, because if she's calling you when she has a boyfriend, she'll call someone else if you're her boyfriend. She's an untrustworthy skank. Don't get into the mindset that you're special. She has a pattern is all, and you're getting caught up in it.
 
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