DonS said:
You need to man up and build your self-confidence. This will start moving you in the right direction.
Totally agree, you're pretty much automatically being put in the "friends" zone. Especially if they're actually saying "youre so nice"
There's really not much you can do at this point. DonS is right, sounds like you need to build up your confidence and stop overthinking things.
You don't have to be an *******, but just stop being a pushover.
here's something i used that worked well. just as an example of being nice, yet being confident, even overtly sexual.
this isn't too long after i became a RAFC, i did have one good thing going for me though, i lost pretty much all my shame.
Girl i'm working with mentions she's hungry, i'm actually on my way to subway to get a sandwich, she happens to love subway.
The little bastard AFC in me tells me to buy her the sub, and she'll be grateful and like me.
My inner spanish Don Juan says "**** that **** ese, you've got 2 heads! USE THEM!"
so instead, i bought a footlong, cut it in half, and pulled it out in front of her, instead of my offering it, she asked me if she could have some. i teased her and grabbed the half meant for her and held it up, as she reached for it i pulled it away playfully. hell i even told her if she wanted it she had to bite it out of my hand. and wouldn't you know it, she laughs, leans out, basically gives me a hug and nuzzle as she bites it.
Big difference, yet i'm still being nice.
You don't have to be an ******* dude, just work on that confidence.