"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Would you ever...

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MysteryWoman

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Would you ever prefer to have a one night stand with an obese ugly woman, or a stunning male homosexual model? You have to choose one, and please answer the question honestly.

Thanks

Mystery
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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What kind of an idiot lesbian/ fag question is this? This is a man's forum - take that shyt to a lesbian/fag websitte!!!!!!!! HO!!!!!
 

Smile

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In all fairness if those were the options i just wouldnt have sex.
 

MysteryWoman

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Lets say if you didn't choose you would be castrated and never be able to have sex again, which would you choose.

Don't be frightened to answer, I'm not judging
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Julian

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Mystery would you rather suck the c0ck of a horse or the c0ck of an gorilla since its more human-like? If you didnt your ovaries would be cut out and inserted in place of your eye balls.
 

SilverSpring1

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Since I'm a woman, if I was to choose between an obese ugly man and a stunning female lesbian model, I would totally pick the female lesbian model. It's odd how straight guys get all funny when we mention homosexuals. I'm glad I can give my honest opinion without fearing other people's reactions.
 

Julian

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Yeah an its really funny how you can expect someone to say "yeah id **** a guy" on a message board thats made to pick up chicks.
 

jakethasnake

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Originally posted by Julian
Mystery would you rather suck the c0ck of a horse or the c0ck of an gorilla since its more human-like? If you didnt your ovaries would be cut out and inserted in place of your eye balls.

LOL



PS: How're ya doin, MysteryWoman? I hope the kids are well. :)
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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quest

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it is a stupid question.

would you rather die by 1000 12' nails being shot at you? or 1000 14' nails?

who the **** cares it's not ever going to happen.
but i would **** the obese woman.

and to the chick. a hot female is much more attractive then a hot guy. i understand how chicks can be bi sexual.
 

dietzcoi

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Holy Sh1t, NEITHER!

But at my age, the sex drive is not so high that I would want either one. I can wait...

If we get castrated, GAME OVER... why would you want your last sex experience to be with a fat ugly woman or a man?

THis is an example of woman's logic!

Dietzcoi
 
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Id probably prefer getting a d1ck up my arse than fvcking some ugly obese freak girl. If I HAD to choose one of them to live that is.
 

squirrels

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Originally posted by quest
it is a stupid question.

would you rather die by 1000 12' nails being shot at you? or 1000 14' nails?

who the **** cares it's not ever going to happen.
but i would **** the obese woman.

and to the chick. a hot female is much more attractive then a hot guy. i understand how chicks can be bi sexual.
God damn! 12' is one long freakin' nail! :D
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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MysteryWoman

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Originally posted by ApparentlyFromMars
Id probably prefer getting a d1ck up my arse than fvcking some ugly obese freak girl. If I HAD to choose one of them to live that is.
Thanks for having the guts to be honest, I just thought this thread is a bit of lighthearted fun.

I think most men would secretely choose hot male model, as good looking men have naturally feminine features. All you have to do is throw on a wig and put a bit of make up on the male model and would be like having a one night stand with a hot woman.
 

squirrels

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This really isn't a fair question at all. This is like that scenario when a terrorist kidnaps your two kids and says, "choose one to die or I kill them both."
 

Golden Arms

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Originally posted by MysteryWoman
Thanks for having the guts to be honest, I just thought this thread is a bit of lighthearted fun.

I think most men would secretely choose hot male model, as good looking men have naturally feminine features. All you have to do is throw on a wig and put a bit of make up on the male model and would be like having a one night stand with a hot woman.
Shows how little you know about men. Most men are repulsed by the idea of touching another male in that way. And it makes no difference if it's a hot male model or some overweight plumber
 

( . )( . )

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your cunning plan to expose us all as the f*ggots we are has worked, mwuahahaha,

holly sh!t, and to think one little old girl (you) outsmarted us dumb idiot men, what a plan.

ive noticed this isnt the first time youve "subtly" tried similiar sh!t like this "accidently try and play men for the silly fools we are"...............im on to you missy.


oh and to answer your question, i wouldnt bang the guy, considering ive hit chicks like you just described in my past why would i not do it again?, no skin off my sack to fvck a warbeast.

and thats the honest truth.



btw for all who dont know or have yet to figure it out.

MysteryWoman = penis envy, with low to mild leanings of misandrism.
 
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