I was wondering if you saw an attractive girl where she worked, such as a restaraunt or a coffee shop, and you knew she was single, would you become a regular, going back several times over a period of weeks, trying to establish a rapport and then asking for the number? Or is it wrong to persue a girl while she is at work? Thanks for any insight.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Would you become a "regular" to meet a girl?
- Thread starter leoncour
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2004
- Messages
- 11,680
- Reaction score
- 4,876
Why waste days, weeks, and months to build rapport? You can build it within a few minutes. Chat with her for a bit, go do something else. Chat with her for a bit, go do something else. Chat and number close, then leave.
This is my favorite strategy. It's effective, and it works.
This is my favorite strategy. It's effective, and it works.
Le Parisien
Master Don Juan
I can't give you a direct answer, but please answer this:leoncour said:
If you do become a regular, and it turns out that she has a BF or she's totally not interested by you, basically it doesn't work out the way you wanted. Would you feel like "Damn, that was a pure waste of time, energy and money" or more like "too bad it didn't work out, but at least I genuinely liked the food, drinks, place; so it's not that bad"?
By now you already got my answer right?
Just one last point: like many people have pointed out here before, trying to pick up a chick when it's actually her job to get money out of your pocket (sure, here we are only talking about a waitress, not a stripper) is generally not a good idea. But hey give it a try if you feel like it.
Rollo Tomassi
Master Don Juan
No. That's a disingenuous attempt to identify with a woman.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
NorPacWolf
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 8, 2005
- Messages
- 370
- Reaction score
- 4
I'm a regular at many places. If you like the vibe, or the food and/or the coffee, there's nothing wrong with becoming a regular. If you think the food is abysmal, as are the drinks and the energy level is pathetic enough to put you to sleep, then I would try to close the girl at the first opportunity.
Wolf
Wolf
leoncour said:
realsmoothie
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 30, 2006
- Messages
- 1,064
- Reaction score
- 9
Women are more difficult to pick up at work because they're in "work" mode. They have their shields up, and are in a place in which they feel comfortable.