"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Would you be mad if GF likes a pic of a guy she had sex with?

randalljohnson

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Really curious. I'm also curious to hear from a female perspective too (Sacz). Let's say a guy (who your GF was once involved with not too long ago-- relationship or FWB) posts a selfie and she Likes it. Would that trigger any jealousy or internal rage?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Glassguy

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Why don't you just stop. This is like the 89th thread you've started and you get the same response.

You're a troll. Mods?????
 

randalljohnson

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Why don't you just stop. This is like the 89th thread you've started and you get the same response.

You're a troll. Mods?????
I'm no troll. It's an honest question and no it isn't the same question
 

Glassguy

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It's all the same dude. Gain some self respect and your problems with women will be solved.
 

resilient

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Randall... monitoring all her behavior on social media is not helping your situation. Your Don Juan growth should be focused on you and your self-improvement. Every minute you waste scrolling through your social media feed and analyzing all her activity is an energy drain on your time and resources. We've helped you in other threads. Now it's time for you to help yourself. Not trying to be d!ck, just saying this is the time to man up and make some decisions.

Insight into social media and insecurity in relationships:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mental-mishaps/201406/how-social-networks-can-inflame-jealousy

On fear:
"We live in a society bloated with data yet starved for wisdom. We're connected 24/7, yet anxiety, fear, depression and loneliness is at an all-time high. We must course-correct." Elizabeth Kapu'uwailani Lindsey
 
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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Asasione

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Really curious. I'm also curious to hear from a female perspective too (Sacz). Let's say a guy (who your GF was once involved with not too long ago-- relationship or FWB) posts a selfie and she Likes it. Would that trigger any jealousy or internal rage?
This is a very stupid question to even be asking. Grow up and stop stalking your gf's social media. Liking photos means nothing
 

randalljohnson

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This is a very stupid question to even be asking. Grow up and stop stalking your gf's social media. Liking photos means nothing
Means NOTHING? That's asinine. Of course Liking pics of somebody you've been involved with means something. I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate it if you found out your GF was doing that
 

bigneil

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You should never be friends with girls you are dating on Facebook. Only exes and prospects.

They will totally respect you - just say you don't want to be Facebook friends. Unfriend them if you are already friends.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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randalljohnson

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You should never be friends with girls you are dating on Facebook. Only exes and prospects.

They will totally respect you - just say you don't want to be Facebook friends. Unfriend them if you are already friends.
Lol come on that sounds kind of silly
 

Asasione

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Means NOTHING? That's asinine. Of course Liking pics of somebody you've been involved with means something. I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate it if you found out your GF was doing that
I have access to her accounts, though I never login and she likes photos of her ex and many other things, doesn't mean a thing. The crap you're talking about doesn't even register in my mind as being worth thinking about, you're either very insecure or a troll cause this is some next level AFC ****. If she was organizing meeting up that's an issue but liking pics you've got to be kidding me
 

sazc

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Really curious. I'm also curious to hear from a female perspective too (Sacz). Let's say a guy (who your GF was once involved with not too long ago-- relationship or FWB) posts a selfie and she Likes it. Would that trigger any jealousy or internal rage?
I agree with @bigneil. Never friend a female you are interested in, or in early dating, on social media. It removes the mystery. It allowed her to judge you without you showing her who you really are, in person. Get to know her for the better part of a year before you add her.

@randalljohnson my ex stalked me on social media the whole time we were dating. He was looking to see what my activity was with men. The only time a man does that, including noticing that she has liked an exes selfie, is when he is extremely insecure about the relationship and her loyalty to him.

I'm guessing you've been cheated on before? Perhaps had a mother who abandoned you in some way? You wouldn't be posting these threads/questions if you felt safe and secure in your relationship. You are gravely afraid of investing your heart only to have it stomped on. We've all been there.

I agree with @resilient . Start using your idle time to focus on your DJ development and skills. You need to arrive at the place where you know you are the prize, the catch, and a female is lucky for your attention.

Good luck
 

RangerMIke

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If it means something or not does not matter... the point is you should not care. You can not control women, if she is going the screw this dude there isn't a fvcking thing you can do about it. Stop worrying about sh!t you can not control.... the point everyone is trying to make to the OP is the only thing you CAN control is how you show up... be the best person you can be spending time trolling you GF's social media doesn't do anything towards self improvement... in fact it is counter productive.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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lizardking82

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OP, I sense declining IL from this woman and your fears and anxiety is something she will smell earlier than you think. You are now kind of desperate and a man should never be desperate for a woman. It is turning off and it just ****s up everything that might be good between you and her.

If your gut feeling tells you sth is wrong, than sth probably is = she might thinking of ****in' the dude or has already done so. This might sound horrible and hurting to you right now, but you gotta get to the point where this slightly bothers you. Create some space between yourself and her and get some clarity. You need clarity.
 

CMNILS87

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Don't have social media to look into and creep on a girl. It's a downward spiral to despair
 

stovepipe

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Never paid attention to who liked what. If you are, then I'd suggest getting off, cause it will only drive you more crazy worrying about that kind of stuff.

Social media is a joke. Too many people worried about likes, he or she didn't friend me, why didnt this person like my pic, I have 1000+ friends.

Deleted my account a while back and couldn't be happier. My HPD ex would grab her phone the sec her eyes opened in the morning and spent a good 30 min on there. Then some days be depressed cause she saw pics of friends doing fun stuff. It got to the point where she was on that crap hours a day and even admitted it was causing her to spiral into depression.
 

randalljohnson

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My general thoughts are that when a woman is stressing me out, I'm likely losing frame.

And this is the 100th thread you've made on the same woman in just a few weeks... it's quite obsessive. Should tell you something.

The only thing we can really control is our own behaviour. Have a good think about yours as it relates to this woman.
Doesn't answer my question
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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