"Blank Mind on Dates? She's Dropping Hints You Keep Missing"

The plates get cleared and the silence lands like a brick. You can feel her waiting. Your brain offers up your commute, your job, the weather — topics that have ended more second dates than bad breath.

Here's what most guys never learn: women hand out free conversational material all night long. Tiny clues about what they actually want to discuss. Catch them and you never run out of things to say — because she's telling you what to say next.

Rule 4 of the "22 Rules" trains your ear to catch every single one.

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Working on this athletic acquaintance

Murph

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This girl is an athlete at my school. She's uniquely beautiful, imo. Anyway, we're merely acquaintances, just "hello, how are ya? how was your summer?". But I asked her if I could do an interview with her for one of my journalism classes.

So she asked if I wanted her number ... obviously I said yes.

I figure I'll do the interview. Then later just ask if she wants to get coffee or something, continue building rapport, and then ask her to dinner when it's right.

Is there anything I'm doing wrong, or anything more I should do? It's almost too early for complimenting ... I'm not quite sure about conveying attraction in this case.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Murph

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EDIT: Nevermind.
 
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Cheiradawg

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There doesn't seem to be naything wrong. She agreed to the interview and SHE OFFERED her number. Just be cool and go for it.
 

Murph

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An update:

My editor for this thing said I can't do it because it doesn't relate to the internet.

( onlinejournalism.com if you're interested)

Good news is I still have her number. But I don't want to make it look like I lied just to get her digits. I figure I should have two separate convo's; one to tell her no interview and one to ask her to get coffee.

Or should I flat-out tell her literally that "I don't want you to think I was bs-ing you to get your number but ... coffee?".
 

Recluce

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there's no need to lie. just tell her the truth. you didn't know the interview had to be something on the internet, but you still think she is interesting and would like to get together some time for a cup of coffee and some stimulating conversation.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Omega

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She was the one who offered her digits so it doesn't matter.
 
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