"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Women who were molested

bigneil

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In all my years I've (thankfully) never had a frigid woman before. Every girl I've been with has liked me more after sex. But my latest girlfriend has serious issues with it. She'll be extremely romantic, and she'll let me touch every part of her, but once sex happens she clearly has issues. It makes me feel as if I abused her, even though she allows it. It's heartbreaking because she's so attractive.

I think it's beyond repair but wondered if many others have dealt with such women. She says she was molested at age 6 (she's 36) and I'm thinking (but not saying) "get over it". She also has a bisexual girlfriend.

When a girl tells you they are damaged goods and need to see a shrink, believe them.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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GameOfNoGame

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I'm not a judgemental person so as much as I would like to tell you that bad things happen so don't let her past effect your present, I've never met a girl who had something traumatic happen to them & was really alright inside.

The irony is that men have a reputation for repressing our emotions while women express them but I find women internalize things much more often. I'm not saying she's beyond hope but she has to want & work towards healing.

She said she needs therapy but is she actually seeking help or just using her trauma as an excuse for her problems? It's not something she can do alone but it's not your responsibility either. This might be something to discuss with her.
 

cablecow15

Master Don Juan
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it bothers me that this is as common as it is , Ive met two girls that had had that happen , one was clearly bothered , and was against doing certain sex acts because of it (a big problem for me) and one that almost seemed as if she brought it up to casually , almost like she made it up for attention. Ifeel horrible saying this , but i usually try to avoid them if i can help it.
 

JustWuzzle

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My ex wife and girlfriend were molested and my ex wife was also physically abused. She didn't want me to get to agressive with her giving my oral sex which sucked pun intended. My ex gf was ocd and weird about me leaving her or dropping her off. The new girl I'm with seems to have no problems I wanted to ask her cause that is a major red flag she is a freak though I'm texting her now. I would say stay away from women who have been molested. They find the stupidest reasons to hate stuff. If they don't get major counseling they could make your life miserable.
 

P­ornography

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Guys don't take this the wrong way, I'm not trolling but my own mother was molested, by her grandfather (whom I've never met).

Not that I keep track of her sexual life or anything but I can say she's a pretty stable human being, FWIW. As stable as a woman can get....she's got attrocious time-managing skills though, not sure if that's a 'symptom' or anything but other than that she's a well rounded, caring person.

I'd always thought things like this would tip a woman to the extremes of sexuality, either being crazy promiscuous or extremely closed off, but my mother has had a stable relationship with my father for about 20 years, still married. Still she admits to me she needs 'help' whatever that means, her and my father, they both see therapists and and do the Alcohoics Annonymous bit, teh whole 9 yards.


She's never told me herself though, my father sat me down when I was younger and explained this to me, personally I feel it was a pretty disgusting thing to do and he had no right disclosing info like that to me my own mother wouldn't disclose to me herself, FVCK THAT GUY. Sorry. I hate dads. Haha.


TL;DR

It's a red flag but it's not a definite sign they're wackjobs. (all women are wackjobs)
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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