Women who ACTUALLY care about you

[Jetleg]

I know this is rare, but have you ever met a woman who actually did care about you? I do believe that 90-95% of women are selfish sl0ts, but it seems that these women are out there.

 

[bigneil]

Why do you think I don't text first, or if so it is rare? Why do you think I occasionally make girls pay for dates? Because my worst fear is being with a woman who doesn't care about me.

That said, we need to be useful to people. They have to stand to lose more than we do if the relationship should end. We need to be generous as men (if only to compete with other men who are generous).

So the balance is finding the right people to be generous to. Would you trust your woman to deliver all of your stuff in an emergency? Would you trust her with a roll of gold coins? Would you trust her alone in a hotel resort for 2 days while you were on a business trip, or is she the type who would sleep with the bus boy? Would you make it worth her while if she came through for you?

And another question is: even if a woman does care about us, can they ever really be trusted? Do women these days ever say "Well I'd like to have sex with this guy, and I am drunk, but that might hurt the man I'm dating so I won't do that"?

Aren't women just like an electronic safe? You push the right code and it opens?

 

[El Payaso]

No. Women just like most humans only care for themselves and what they can get out of any given situation. She will only "care about you" if there is something in it for her. The only people who really care for someone is a parent for his or her child and even at that, not all parents really care about their children.

Realize and accept women and all humans for what they are (people who are only in it for themselves) and life will be a whole lot easier.

 

[bigneil]

No. Women just like most humans only care for themselves and what they can get out of any given situation. She will only "care about you" if there is something in it for her.

True. In Laws of Power Robert Greene reminds us to never appeal to someone's sense of charity, but pay what things are worth. That's why if someone delivers all of your stuff it's worth say 20% of all your stuff. A man can be trusted moreso than a woman in that situation.

A big part of it is simply that women could never be left alone and trusted. For example, in the 1800's a woman would fear God so she would be faithful, but if you left her alone on the ranch for 3 days she'd likely be raped. That is, you can't trust men so therefore you have to guard your women. It could be that we overlook that women could simply never be left alone period.

 

[homie]

My mom

 

[Desdinova]

Women just like most humans only care for themselves and what they can get out of any given situation.

The bottom line is everybody is selfish.

She will only "care about you" if there is something in it for her.

Women function a bit differently when it comes to men. I honestly believe that women are after their "soulmate", both in their conscious and subconscious mind. The selfishness is what will define whether she stays with the man who will ultimately alpha-widow her, or if she leaves him. If she becomes selfish and wants someone "better" or to have a temporary sexual experience with another man, then her selfishness will ultimately destroy her ability to retain her "soulmate". On the same token, her selfishness to keep her "soulmate" can also work in her favour.

Would you trust your woman to deliver all of your stuff in an emergency? Would you trust her with a roll of gold coins? Would you trust her alone in a hotel resort for 2 days while you were on a business trip, or is she the type who would sleep with the bus boy? Would you make it worth her while if she came through for you?

The funny thing is even if all your answers to these questions prove that she's a good woman, you still cannot be guaranteed that she's a good woman. I believe that she needs to completely adopt and live your lifestyle without complaint. She has to permanently be in the passenger seat, helping you get to your destination. If she ever tries to take over the steering wheel, she's not the right woman.

 

[ThisNThat]

The bottom line is everybody is selfish.



Women function a bit differently when it comes to men. I honestly believe that women are after their "soulmate", both in their conscious and subconscious mind. The selfishness is what will define whether she stays with the man who will ultimately alpha-widow her, or if she leaves him. If she becomes selfish and wants someone "better" or to have a temporary sexual experience with another man, then her selfishness will ultimately destroy her ability to retain her "soulmate". On the same token, her selfishness to keep her "soulmate" can also work in her favour.



The funny thing is even if all your answers to these questions prove that she's a good woman, you still cannot be guaranteed that she's a good woman. I believe that she needs to completely adopt and live your lifestyle without complaint. She has to permanently be in the passenger seat, helping you get to your destination. If she ever tries to take over the steering wheel, she's not the right woman.

I remember a woman in her 50s, she was separated from her husband. Apparently, she's a deep south culture type. Family generations all living in the same area. She said she's so plum worn out doing things for other people (including her husband) being a matriarch, that it's "time for me now."

Some women tend to become selfish when they've felt they've given too much in a marriage or relationship. Going from one extreme to the next.

Of course, there are those that have always been inherently selfish since the beginning.

Either way, I've seen their criteria with online dating sites and it's like "I gotta have it this way, and this is how I am.!" It's a "My way ,or the highway" attitude.

Some tend to quote that irritating, "If you can't accept me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best!" quote by Marilyn Monroe. The context they are saying it in raises flags.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Enlightened self-interest anyone?

 

[Roober]

The bottom line is everybody is selfish.



Women function a bit differently when it comes to men. I honestly believe that women are after their "soulmate", both in their conscious and subconscious mind. The selfishness is what will define whether she stays with the man who will ultimately alpha-widow her, or if she leaves him. If she becomes selfish and wants someone "better" or to have a temporary sexual experience with another man, then her selfishness will ultimately destroy her ability to retain her "soulmate". On the same token, her selfishness to keep her "soulmate" can also work in her favour.



The funny thing is even if all your answers to these questions prove that she's a good woman, you still cannot be guaranteed that she's a good woman. I believe that she needs to completely adopt and live your lifestyle without complaint. She has to permanently be in the passenger seat, helping you get to your destination. If she ever tries to take over the steering wheel, she's not the right woman.

This is it! Everyone is selfish we really shouldn't just put it only on women. A woman who is always looking for a better option is not really any different than a nonchalant DJ who spins multiple plates. Everyone has to look out for themselves and rightfully so. Successful relationships are a byproduct of two people realizing that their selfish desires do not have more value than those of their partners. For example, a married guy wanting to get laid, will stick by his woman because he understands how his actions will impact their marriage and his spouse.

 

[lizardking82]

Hard to tell, usually the breakups wash away any perception that I was ever meaningfully cared about. Obviously during the relationship I believed they cared but then things come out later and you start to remember some of the sketchy behavior even early in the relationship when interest was supposedly high. I know that I would never treat someone I cared about that way. My two longest relationships were sabatoged by major lies and high-score orbiters from day one, so Im not sure they even intended for them to go anywhere.

As far as female friends, I have had a few of the show compassion and caring when I was going through tough times. Im aware there is a limit to that as there is with all friends but I was pleasantly surprised each time. I've also seen the opposite where it's like "you just talked about your problems for an hour and now when I mention one thing you can't even pretend to be empathetic" lol.

I have read somewhere that all the caring women do, on a certain level, is out of fear that they will lose the possible bringer of their offspring. Such a cold and ****ed up way to think about it that means if you have a car accident and she is so worried and all, part of that is because she's afraid she will lose the possible father of her possible children LOL

But I completely know what you mean in the first paragraph. Sometimes, after it's said and done, you look back and you spot things you were unable to spot before because you were too emotionally involved.

 

[homie]

I think it's almost impossible for a relatively sane normal guy to see these things except in hindsight, because it just seems totally illogical and manipulative behavior for no reason.

Oh yeah, it just makes no sense at the moment.