Women and empathy

[Bokanovsky]

I agree that men and women display empathy in different ways. Men typically emphasize with those they can relate to, while women who empathy as a way of seeking approval. For example, a man might feel empathy for a disabled veteran because he can imagine himself in that veteran's place. A woman, on the other, might feel more sympathy for starving children in some far away land. Not because she can relate to those children but because she believes that this is how society expects her to feel. This is why women are more prone to falling for various woke causes.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Not because she can relate to those children but because she believes that this is how society expects her to feel. This is why women are more prone to falling for various woke causes.

Ehhh. Women are hardwired to be nurturing. It has nothing to do with being “woke.” Children, cute animals, and other women (they are naturally child-like) elicit the nurturing instinct. Adult men do not. She does not have empathy for able-bodied men. Her programming says that men are supposed to be protective and provide for her. That’s why she could seemingly give two fvcks about her boyfriend’s personal struggles.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

Some of the woke/leftist programming may actually be pathological altruism, and certainly applies to women (although often times it's just thinly veiled narcissism and virtue signalling)

It's the reason why women are not suitable for leadership/political positions. In many cases, they've replaced their innate nurturing needs for family with society/political problems (such as immigration).

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

The lack of empathy in women is rooted in evolutionary psychology, something that isn't spoken of much in these circles anymore. A few hundred years ago and for thousands of years, before intruders overran towns, cities, and villages, they killed the men or enslaved them and sent them away, then took the women as their own.

Ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome? The women would have to then move on mentally from their previous lives and adjust to their new men, to survive, and hopefully, the guy would let her already existing children survive too. This requires a very Machiavellian outlook, and the ones who possessed the chromosomes that expressed the ability to do this were the women who survived to pass on their genes. It's simple evolution and genetic memory.

 

[Mike32ct]

The problem is, a lot of life is discussing one's problems, obstacles, what you tried to do to solve them, what didn't work, etc.

What kind of life is just, how was your day, oh everything was great, or if not, well no worries I'll solve problem xyz soon enough, everything is rainbows and sunshine.

Perhaps women want a man to project this illusion, well, most certainly do, this stems first and foremost with stability and success with one's job and income stream. Everything else kind of falls into place from there.

If you want a chick that you can comfortably vent to sometimes, you need a good female friend (like a sister figure of sorts).

We can’t really vent to a romantic/sexual partner. Or at least it must be kept to a minimum.

Women can be very empathic, but it does not typically extend towards their lover.

Overall, it’s a weird dynamic from a guy’s perspective, but it is what it is.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

Ehhh. Women are hardwired to be nurturing. It has nothing to do with being “woke.” Children, cute animals, and other women (they are naturally child-like) elicit the nurturing instinct. Adult men do not. She does not have empathy for able-bodied men. Her programming says that men are supposed to be protective and provide for her. That’s why she could seemingly give two fvcks about her boyfriend’s personal struggles.

No.......

they have empathy for everyone the hivemind tells them to.

Thats why you see western women welcoming grown azz male "refugees" with open arms, flowers and teddy bears, because the media tells them its the right thing to do/feel.

Menwhile men see illegal migrants, coming to rape women and social systems, financed by tax payers.

Another example is the LGBTQ movement, most women will give you a positive opinion about that woke shyt, while men will generally be rather reserved or rejecting.

Women are so easy to manipulate and steer in a direction, thats why they are the globalists favorite tool and why masculine/independent (uncontrollable) men are a danger to the globalist agenda.

 

[Scaramouche]

Hi CaptainFinnBad,
This empathy generally costs nothing and is a cheap form of Virtue Signalling,
This signalling,is not to the community at large,but rather to build up Social Credit with the Sisterhood...A recent rather sinister change,is the to me,historically unique,Pathological empathy where they affect to despise their own Race,Religion,values and Culture,in favour of alternatives that would destroy everything we hold dear.

 

[LTG71]

This seems to be an evolutionary engrained behavior. Man is seen as the protector and provider. Any moment of weakness is seen as a liability and unattractive.

Woman look for cues such as:
Dark triad traits - driven
Guy that is slightly jacked and could knock someone out if necessary - tough
Beards - indicator of high testosterone and ruggedness but not guaranteed
Dangerous hobbies - excitement, invokes emotional rush

A guy that is “nice“ that she can walk all over and is emotional is unattractive. If she can walk all over him, what is going to happen if someone else threatens you? She no longer sees you as a protector. For example, women don’t care about homeless men, they naturally want a man to pull himself out of the predicament and persevere. If and when they do, it is to virtue signal to others. They also don’t have empathy because they have no idea what it’s like to be a man. They assume we get everything handed to us by the patriarchy, lol. Yeah, I just wake up and get free money.

I have a coworker that is older, rides a Harley to work, walks in with leathers and helmet everyday and looks battle hardened. He had at one time, 3 Vietnamese women all fighting for his attention. One sent him nudes, the other two even suggested a threesome. We are still dumbfounded to the reason why because he is a lazy worker, but he paints this tough guy persona and certain women eat that up. All of these women were married or in LTRs too. Women like azzholes because they don’t show weakness.

 

[Luni]

I don't expect empathy from women. It's just not something I need a woman for.

A lot of men bytch about women's lack thereof but perhaps women are built a little stronger than men in this regard. They're certainly more practical. There's no need to be seeking empathy from a chick, either suck it up or find a man or clergy or something.

finally

 

[The Duke]

No.......

they have empathy for everyone the hivemind tells them to.

Thats why you see western women welcoming grown azz male "refugees" with open arms, flowers and teddy bears, because the media tells them its the right thing to do/feel.

Menwhile men see illegal migrants, coming to rape women and social systems, financed by tax payers.

Another example is the LGBTQ movement, most women will give you a positive opinion about that woke shyt, while men will generally be rather reserved or rejecting.

Women are so easy to manipulate and steer in a direction, thats why they are the globalists favorite tool and why masculine/independent (uncontrollable) men are a danger to the globalist agenda.

And as we see more women in positions of power the more we see these ideologies erode society.

 

[Gamisch]

The lack of empathy in women is rooted in evolutionary psychology, something that isn't spoken of much in these circles anymore. A few hundred years ago and for thousands of years, before intruders overran towns, cities, and villages, they killed the men or enslaved them and sent them away, then took the women as their own.

Ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome? The women would have to then move on mentally from their previous lives and adjust to their new men, to survive, and hopefully, the guy would let her already existing children survive too. This requires a very Machiavellian outlook, and the ones who possessed the chromosomes that expressed the ability to do this were the women who survived to pass on their genes. It's simple evolution and genetic memory.

This is so true and indeed extremely underrated.

You could say that the bluepill as we know it is actually the "new invention " and the red pill is how humans were build for thousands of years. A " promiscuous "female slave would definitely survive easier.

Yet we are still dumbfounded when again and again women make these socalled " irrational decisions ". And people act like the phrase " female nature " is something new.

 

[BadBoy89]

The problem is, a lot of life is discussing one's problems, obstacles, what you tried to do to solve them, what didn't work, etc.

Not to women.

Women don’t want to hear problems from men, they just want the spoils. For a woman:

A man goes to work, has problems, comes home, tells girlfriend -> things are OK
A man goes with friends, has problems, comes home, tells girlfriend -> things are OK
A man goes with family, has problems, comes home, tells girlfriend -> things are OK

In 95% of the situations, a man cannot show emotion or get angry. Whatever happens, he has to tell his girlfriend or wife -> things are OK.

The only time a man can show emotion to his girlfriend or lover is if it’s a tragic event; family member passed away or long time pet animal passes or something, he then is allowed to shed a tear. The girlfriend will accept that,

Other than that, society has given her carte blanche to destroy the man.

 

[BeExcellent]

Hmmmmm. I find this topic sad really as the old lady around here. I have real empathy, and toward many men, close friends (one of whom is in a battle for his life against colon cancer)…and of course toward my husband and my son.

I have a giving nature, but predominantly for those close to me. I have to watch that people don’t develop entitlement toward my generous nature, and I’ve had to become guarded to prevent that.

I’ve taken my friend to chemo, offered to help him in any way he needs as he struggles with his treatments. If my husband has work struggles or family struggles or any issues I listen carefully and I do offer advice, but I first seek to understand him and where things are in order to help effectively. I do the same for my son. I want him to understand himself and the world and give him wisdom that will help him succeed in his endeavors. At times that is tough love and discipline certainly but it is to help him learn how the world is, to learn self discipline and to hone his social acumen & leadership ability.

I do these things privately and without fanfare. I do them because it is the honorable thing to do.

To say that WOMEN as a defacto state do not have any empathy for men is a viewpoint that to me demonstrates a failure to recognize or attract (or both) women who posses this quality. We exist.

We are rare but do exist.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

80/20 rule @BeExcellent

 

[manfrombelow]

Women generally struggle to manage when intense negative emotions like extreme anger, rage, fear, despair, or depression repeatedly consume a man. In fact, anything a woman perceives as weakness. They may want to support their man, but the extended manifestation of such emotions is difficult to endure. This unrelenting emotional turmoil erodes attraction, raises concerns about the relationship's stability, and could subconsciously push women to seek other potential partners.

This might be partly due to women's preference for more covert forms of communication, which involve subtlety and nuance rather than overt displays of intense emotion. Men's raw, unfiltered expressions of feelings may appear intimidating or overwhelming, leading to unease and discomfort.

I've mentioned that women want to say their guy is emotionally "in tune," that he's "done the work," and is a great communicator. They really don't care if you have as long as they can say you have. You might get to display some faux sensitivity once or twice a year, like being sad your friend's dog died or that you need her support when you’re going through something stressful at work. That's it, guys! Don't fall for the false advertising.

Therefore, a woman witnessing a male persistently battling such emotional distress will likely start considering a replacement expeditiously.

When men discuss or try to navigate dating, mating, or relationship problems, women often find it difficult to provide a supportive platform. They are more likely to interpret a man sharing these issues as redundant whining or a sign of bitterness. Some may attribute it to poor judgment, resulting in dismissive responses such as "You've made your bed, now lie in it" or "Buck up, nobody wants to hear you groan about it." This is why you need to keep it tight, and close to the belt.

Never talk about past relationships in detail - ever - ever - ever, there lie dragons. If you pursue a relationship with the woman you might let her pry a little here and there but still be coy, women love a mystery.

You have nailed it perfectly Daniel Craig.

 

[IamtheAlphamale]

Again they have empathy for an animal or a kid or even a plant. For men? Hahahaha omg are you for real?

I actually have the opposite experience with mental health stuff. I had psychosis before from drug use when I was younger, and had like the scariest possible **** going on in my mind. And I've found it actually just made women much more attracted to me and they were very supportive. But I barely talked about it.

But my mom was a nightmare to deal with at those times.

But potential mates were all very good in how they acted. But im very easy going and not effected by pretty much anything kind of guy, so they may have liked my calm unaffected demeanor or being energied while telling them the scariest possible things and thinking I was dead for sure etc.

 

[BeExcellent]

80/20 rule @BeExcellent

Might even be 90/10 or 95/05. But Pareto’s principle doesn’t have to be the effective application in the dating world.

Here’s what I mean by that. Each man has to weigh what is most important right? So let’s use your math and say only 20% of available women have empathy/are truly supportive of men. Well that makes sense really. The majority of unattached women are unattached because there is something about these women that repels men. For some they have unfortunate looks, for some they got fat, for some they have ugly attitudes, for some they are users, on and on. So only 20% of women are pleasant to be around. What percentage of pleasant women are also objectively physically attractive? Ah now the percent shifts to 90/10 or even 95/05.

And so as a man do you really want to get sexual only 5% of the time? Probably not. If you can you’d like to laid more often than that. Therefore getting the weenie wet is higher priority than finding a pleasant personality in an attractive girl.

And that is why we have threads like this. When you settle in favor of sex as the highest priority all those other characteristics are secondary.

And thusly these men are ruled by the penis first which begets all the complaints about women’s nature. My son doesn’t have these complaints and neither does my husband. Why? Because holding out for a top 5% woman was/is more important than having sex.

Food for thought.

 

[mbc0029]

There's also "Sympathy". Basically, when someone feels bad for you. Women will never be able to "Empathize" with a man. Women can empathize with other women, just like men can empathize with other men. But empathizing with the opposite sex is virtually impossible.

And even if she feels "Sympathy" for you, she basically sees you as equal or beneath her. For a woman you're trying to take seriously, that's not a good thing. Women can feel what other women are going through, but not men.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

My argument is that the majority of women do not have empathy for men. How could they? They do not live as men in our society and are not exposed to what men are. In general true empaths comprise a very low % of the population to begin with.

Can an intelligent and thoughtful woman understand men’s plight? Possibly, but never truly and never completely. They can extrapolate but not experience it as their own.

Personally, I’m happy with my station in life. I’ve learned to accept irrevocable truths about the SMP, are there outliers? Sure there are, but the exception, does not prove the rule.

Might even be 90/10 or 95/05. But Pareto’s principle doesn’t have to be the effective application in the dating world.

Here’s what I mean by that. Each man has to weigh what is most important right? So let’s use your math and say only 20% of available women have empathy/are truly supportive of men. Well that makes sense really. The majority of unattached women are unattached because there is something about these women that repels men. For some they have unfortunate looks, for some they got fat, for some they have ugly attitudes, for some they are users, on and on. So only 20% of women are pleasant to be around. What percentage of pleasant women are also objectively physically attractive? Ah now the percent shifts to 90/10 or even 95/05.

And so as a man do you really want to get sexual only 5% of the time? Probably not. If you can you’d like to laid more often than that. Therefore getting the weenie wet is higher priority than finding a pleasant personality in an attractive girl.

And that is why we have threads like this. When you settle in favor of sex as the highest priority all those other characteristics are secondary.

And thusly these men are ruled by the penis first which begets all the complaints about women’s nature. My son doesn’t have these complaints and neither does my husband. Why? Because holding out for a top 5% woman was/is more important than having sex.

Food for thought.

 

[dude99]

Just like to here your thoughts on women and empathy.

Obviously women have empathy but I think is might be slightly different to how a man has empathy.

I might be wrong on this assumption but it come across to me is the women's ability to empathise is about how it makes them feel.

For example.... The come across a bird with a broken wing. The can show empathy, diligently and selflessly nurse it back to health. This feels good to them.

But I think without this emotion women find it hard to have empathy. Especially showing empathy to someone they have hurt or caused pain too, as to show empathy in this situation makes them feel bad, because they must perceive they have done something wrong.

So they are unable to empathise in this regard. To show empathy means accountability and this is something I rarely see from women.

Not true accountability anyways. You will hear statements like "I'm terrible mum, because of this or this", these statements are always exaggerated to enlist a response from the listener and to provide reasons she's not /stroke her ego.

This relates a lot to dating for obvious reasons.

Women can sympathize with men, but they can not truly empathize with them. They aren't wired that way. Hypergamy is the opposite of empathy

Some may feel bad or sorry for you (sympathy) and what you could be going through but woman can never truly empathize with a man aka walk a mile in his shoes and feel his stress or experience. If they truly felt empathy the way men do then you wouldn't have millions of women filing for divorce only because they are bored and believe the grass will be greener.

Your wounded bird example is am example of sympathy. She feels sorry for the bird so she helps the bird.

An example of the difference is this

Sympathy = I slapped Rodney because I was having an emotional meltdown. I feel bad Now for hitting him.

Empathy = " I wouldn't want to be slapped at all that would hurt and upset me, even though I am having an emotional melt down hitting Rodney is wrong so I won't do that."