Woman has purchased ticket to visit me, but I'm seeing someone

[Snag87]

Long story short: I was talking to two women simultaneously, one local and the other long-distance. Things have moved quickly with the local girl to the point where we're spending the night together 3-4 times per week and she's referred to me as her boyfriend. The issue is the long-distance girl has expressed a strong interest in me and has purchased tickets to fly in and spend an entire week together.

How should I handle the situation? Long distance girl is set to arrive in a little over two weeks.

 

[corrector]

Do a threesome.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Come clean and tell her not to.

Seems like you left out of your description of the situation that you continued to talk to the long distance once as if nothing has changed.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Do you want to be her boyfriend?
Do you want to spin plates or you’re ready for a relationship?
Have you made a commitment?
Do you want to cheat on your commitment?

Maybe these questions would help you decide

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

Lol how is it that the second girl just "decided" to purchase tickets? Im pretty hard about my time. That should have been agreed upon beforehand if at all.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

3-4 nights a week off jump is a lot, you clearly have this woman terrified of losing you, which screams that you could do better.

Dont settle out for the first woman throwing you scraps of attention.

 

[Doctor Europeo]

This is going to be fun (for us). Keep us updated op.

 

[Tilex]

You need to leave town if the long distance girl is visiting you.

Take the long distance girl somewhere on vacation or get a hotel room together.
Or you can reverse the frame and tell the long distance girl that you're busy working that week and you need time in advance to request off.
Ask if you can visit her later this month or whatever.

Long distance chick should be 2nd or 3rd priority.

 

[Snag87]

Do you want to be her boyfriend?
Do you want to spin plates or you’re ready for a relationship?
Have you made a commitment?
Do you want to cheat on your commitment?

Maybe these questions would help you decide

I would agree to an open relationship. Don't think I'm ready for monogamy.

 

[Snag87]

Come clean and tell her not to.

Seems like you left out of your description of the situation that you continued to talk to the long distance once as if nothing has changed.

Seems this is the most ethical option. I hope she has insurance on her tickets.

 

[SW15]

Come clean and tell her not to.

Seems like you left out of your description of the situation that you continued to talk to the long distance once as if nothing has changed.

This.

Seems this is the most ethical option. I hope she has insurance on her tickets.

Even if she doesn't have that, she can get a flight credit for a future flight with most airlines.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

Long story short: I was talking to two women simultaneously, one local and the other long-distance. Things have moved quickly with the local girl to the point where we're spending the night together 3-4 times per week and she's referred to me as her boyfriend. The issue is the long-distance girl has expressed a strong interest in me and has purchased tickets to fly in and spend an entire week together.

How should I handle the situation? Long distance girl is set to arrive in a little over two weeks.

3-4 times a week jeez! If you dont refer to her as a GF she takes up WAY to much of your time!

Take the long-distance woman on a weekend trip to somewhere in your extended area.

Seems this is the most ethical option. I hope she has insurance on her tickets.

I would agree to an open relationship. Don't think I'm ready for monogamy.

Now what? If you are not ready for monogamy, why would you keep the one around thats clutching to you 3-4 times a week?

There is nothing "ethical" with keeping a woman around that refers to you as BF while you tell us you are not willing to comit to her.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

Great idea on the extended out of town trip. If OP is smooth he could pull this off and meet the other girl to vet her while keeping the other

Women are experts at this

Next time he can fly over to the other girl and get another weekend with her out of this.

I did this a lot. Had a local chick and one 2-4 hours away from my place.

The local ones sometimes were pissed over me being away for weekends, but never dumped me unless they caught me in the act, but i rarely had the away chick at my place.

Sometimes i kept this up for half a year until i dumped one or the other.

@Snag87
Women dont have ethics, they have feelings and they dont care about yours.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Long story short: I was talking to two women simultaneously, one local and the other long-distance. Things have moved quickly with the local girl to the point where we're spending the night together 3-4 times per week and she's referred to me as her boyfriend. The issue is the long-distance girl has expressed a strong interest in me and has purchased tickets to fly in and spend an entire week together.

How should I handle the situation? Long distance girl is set to arrive in a little over two weeks.

Why are you allowing a woman to basically move in with you?

 

[Stoic]

Pick the best one. Choose wisely.
Usually the uglier one.

haha there is probably truth to this

 

[Snag87]

Why are you allowing a woman to basically move in with you?

I'm going to her place.

 

[SW15]

we're spending the night together 3-4 times per week and she's referred to me as her boyfriend.

Why are you allowing a woman to basically move in with you?

I'm going to her place.

It doesn't matter where the sleepover is, the spending the night is the issue. There's a recent thread on sleepovers.

No sleepovers policy

For those of you that live alone, I’m wondering how many of you have a clear no spending the night policy at your place? I have had gals that are allowed to in the past and it was fine, they’re rare. This is MY space, not your second home. Some just start assuming they can leave their stuff or...

www.sosuave.net

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I'm going to her place.

Why are you moving in with her? Same concept, it doesn't matter whose place it's at.

Show some self control. This will not end well.

 

[Snag87]

So, it's crunch time. I'm thinking I'm just going to tell her I started seeing someone and it's gotten semi-serious but I'm still technically single. I'll state she's welcome to come but if she opts not to I completely understand.

 

[Snag87]

Did you ever tell her you are unattached and looking for a monogamous relationship?

Not directly, but we met in a singles FB group. I've never mentioned monogamy to her.