Look guys. I agree. I know
@The Duke and
@Barrister and
@Pierce.Manhammer are all actually successful with women in real life. Very successful in fact. I respect that and I respect their voices here as well as many other voices.
Agree
@Barrister and thank you. We’ve had in depth conversations and I greatly respect your perspective and the journey it took to gain said perspective.
I too have had to adjust my perspective over my life, especially in my 20s. Appearances frankly were never emphasized in my home growing up. Manners, intelligence, ambition, work ethic, politeness and above all, character. So imagine finding out that the desirable men in fact did NOT care about those things until much later in a dating situation. Add to that I also had no idea I was beautiful because that was under emphasized and thus under appreciated as important in my home as a girl. So I was naive and innocent into my 20s. My sorority sisters took pity on me and got me up to speed and I learned well how important beauty is to men. I am grateful for my looks and take care to maintain that.
I’m here because it is important to me to promote manhood (the value of which is underrated out there in the whole world.). Every corner of society needs more “real men”. Women need “real men”.
There are fewer and fewer examples around of “real men” and few places being a real man is encouraged or promoted.
Honestly this place IS an echo chamber at times. Even some of the seasoned members pick up the “All women are this….” and “All women are that…” sentiment at times.
My content over my years here consistently reflects Who. I. Am. Nothing more & nothing less. Do I get tomatoes at times? Sure. I get it. Even in this post Billy is posting senior citizens playing pickle ball. That’s not at all my physical reality, but that’s Ok. I don’t expect young men in their 20s or 30s to understand that a woman can still be sexy rather than frumpy later in life. That’s a matter of perspective. So too is what an individual man values for his own life. In his post above
@ThisIsSparta provides his list in the thread…but that isn’t a universally applicable list.
There is no void in my heart Duke. I am happy with myself, content and fulfilled in my life. The anecdotes I relate are true. Why wouldn’t they be?
I’m not sure why this (rather innocuous in my view) observation of a successful man in a successful marriage tweaks y’all.
Many guys here actually do want that kind of life at the end of the day. And yes, so do I. But I’m on that path already and have no complaints. I love my man, think he’s hot and sexy and smart etc….and he thinks those things about me. He loves me too, and was smitten at first sight.
Obviously looks are extremely important for a woman to retain attractiveness. That is partly genetics and partly lifestyle choices, and it requires effort as you age. No question.
Positive people with great energy attract others. Law of Attraction at work. But the same is true of negative energy. It repels people.
This is a male space. I know that, respect that and am not here to tarnish that or erode it. But sometimes even those with great life experience are influenced by jadedness. It seeps into one’s value system.
As @AtomSmasher has always said, the gems are out there. He married one recently and in his contentment has receded from SS, like
@Colossus and others before him and since him. As I have said many times great and happy marriages do exist. But you know what? My first marriage failed. You guys have had failed marriages and failed relationships and so have I. But I retain the view that what I desire in life exists and I know I am worthy of it and willing to do my level best to find a great partner and to BE a great partner.
So I remain positive in my outlook and confident that I will attract and obtain the life I want. It’s an evolution. I’m already intrinsically happy in or out of a relationship. That vibrational energy oozes from me and attracts men and people at large. But I’m still growing as a human being. That’s a process of course.
Each of us must stand and look at the mirror and figure out what could have been different or better and each one of us must own our “stuff”. Me included.
When I met that man yesterday on the plane I see it as confirmation that what I would like does in fact exist and I see that as a positive thing. For me & for you guys too.
When you carry a negative filter you see things in a negative way. The experience for me was positive and inspiring. Those guys do exist. It’s not some mythical thing like this place makes it out to be.
But if you say something is a myth it does protect one’s belief system.
Food for thought.