"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Will it matter to you if your wife had been with 3 to 5 guys before?

Nutz

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Forgot to mention that 3-5 is their number of guys that mattered. That doesn't include the one night stands and gay friends they've screwed around with or the gay friend that isn't gay that doesn't really count. Add all of those in with the first numbers and it usually triples the overall figure.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

old married dude

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I don't think it matters much as long as you're OK with it & they're faithful to you.

My wife falls into the 3-5 category, or so she says which is cool.

On the other end of the spectrum, I have a friend whose wife has been with over 300 men & even worked as an escort at one point. That's a bit much for me, but he's OK with her past & she's faithful to our knowledge. She's a very good mother to their two kids.
 

PappyS

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Women generally only get married after they've been in "circulation" for a while, starting in their early to mid teens.

Married women don't seem to be particularly faithful. Married men seem to have trouble getting their wives to have sex with them.

Anyone still want to get married?
 

Gangster Of Love

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vagrant said:
Yes or no? Please explain your reasons.

Is it a big deal or a small deal? I need someone to share different perspectives so I can start reprogramming my mind. It seems very hard to imagine that your wife had been with lots of different men. I think this is one aspect of me being an AFC that I need to handle. Please feel free to share your thoughts. :yes:
The better question is, "Will it matter to you if your wife had been with 30 to 50 guys before?"

I suggest you start working on handling that reality instead of living in a dream scenario where most women go through 3-5 by the time they are in college. So yes, 3-5 is relatively low, nowadays.

For the AFC or judgmental type who can't stand the thought that somebody else was there before, I suggest you look for a virgin, otherwise your insecurities might just get the best of you.
 

Veridin

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Three to five is nothing! The average at the age of thirty is 7.5 sexual partners for American men and women.

Here is a better question: what would you say about a girl in her mid-twenties who you are dating who has slept with, say 23 guys, but she won't have sex with you? Pretty bad for your self-esteem, wouldn't you say? :)
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Nutz

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Veridin said:
Three to five is nothing! The average at the age of thirty is 7.5 sexual partners for American men and women.

Here is a better question: what would you say about a girl in her mid-twenties who you are dating who has slept with, say 23 guys, but she won't have sex with you? Pretty bad for your self-esteem, wouldn't you say? :)
Depends. Is she a recovering slut trying to atone for her ways, or does she see you as beta provider material and is trying to ration sex for provisions like fine meals, jewelry, etc?
 

Deadly_Ripped

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Women who've had many partners tend to know what they're doing in bed... they also tend to know what they like and can communicate it better than virgins or prudes.

If the woman is disease-free, then you only have things to gain from her experimentation... not to mention the ego-boost that she has been able to sleep with all of these other men and is choosing to sleep with you!

Get over it and you might even enjoy it!
 

Deadly_Ripped

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Women who've had many partners tend to know what they're doing in bed... they also tend to know what they like and can communicate it better than virgins or prudes.

If the woman is disease-free, then you only have things to gain from her experimentation... not to mention the ego-boost that she has been able to sleep with all of these other men and is choosing to sleep with you!

Get over it and you might even enjoy it!
 

In2theGame

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vagrant said:
Yes or no? Please explain your reasons.

Is it a big deal or a small deal? I need someone to share different perspectives so I can start reprogramming my mind. It seems very hard to imagine that your wife had been with lots of different men. I think this is one aspect of me being an AFC that I need to handle. Please feel free to share your thoughts. :yes:
By todays standards, 3 or even 4 is considered "pure" My girlfriend has been with 3 and i dont care, i gettin that azz though and tear it up and make sure shes on her knees praising my c0ck. i dont have time to worry about what the "slvt" did.
 

Aenigma

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K-X: I find that my life is much more satisfying when I try to make the women do kinky things that she's going to have to lie/keep quiet about if we ever break up. Screw the worrying about other men- let other men worry about me.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

PappyS

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Deadly_Ripped said:
Women who've had many partners tend to know what they're doing in bed... they also tend to know what they like and can communicate it better than virgins or prudes.

If the woman is disease-free, then you only have things to gain from her experimentation... not to mention the ego-boost that she has been able to sleep with all of these other men and is choosing to sleep with you!

Get over it and you might even enjoy it!
True.

However many married men don't seem to get much action in the bedroom. Or they get the "bored wife" experience. The experienced women who used to be a freak might turn into a prude with her husband once she gets married. Seems to be a common scenario.
 
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