"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Why the sudden spike in interest from her?

the_stig

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I met this girl on okcupid mid-december and we obviously clicked. It turned out she teaches fitness classes at my gym, and we both agreed it best to tread carefully so things weren't awkward at the club. She expressed interest in meeting for a drink a few weeks ago, but didn't want to call it a date for the above reasons. It ended up lasting 4 hours with her saying multiple times we should do it again. She was already getting involved with another guy at that time, and still is (not offical), so we haven't spoke much over the past week or two.

She'd been asking me to attend one of her classes, so tonight I did. I knew a lot of people and came off as quasi-popular. Chatted with her after, teasing her and got her to smile right away. I left for the locker room after a few people joined our conversation, to quit while I was ahead. She texted a few minutes later asking if I was still at the club, I said no, and she continued to text me. Went on facebook when I got home, she IMed me right away with a much higher IL than normal by the amount she was writing. She even called me "darling" when she was saying goodnight and we'd catch up very soon. Doubt i'm friend zoned, i'm flirty with her and can still feel sexual tension between us. She commented a few days ago that she got the player vibe because of how I flirt with her though, I denied it of course.

Does it sound like her interest spiked tonight or am I over thinking?
 
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"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Tiguere

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The other guy is probably not in the picture anymore? Take her for drinks again and this time escalate.
 

Chickfight

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Why so surprised? You did a good job increasing attraction when you met her at the gym, especially with the social proof and then leaving her wanting more. Just keep your cool and bring it home ;)
 

Zarky

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You're in a good position, play a little hard to get. The mistake most dudes make when they're in your position is they go "Oh, she's totally interested now" and they stop gaming her and start making their interest clear and this totally snuffs her budding desire. Move at half the speed you think you should.
 

SoSuaveDude

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Great job, and that display of social proof was nice! But be cautious and certainly be careful of the poisonous oneitis developing!
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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terran2k

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you did fine, except for one thing. when she commented she got a player vibe from you, you denied it. how do you know the player vibe isn't what attracted her to you.
being thought off as a player isn't a bad thing, it has worked in my favor.
I would just be cautious about trying to always please her.
if you always try to keep her happy, she will leave you.
 

Master Blunt

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I agree with everyone. You did good so far, just keep it cool and don't be a sap when you know she is really digging you.
 

f283000

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terran2k said:
you did fine, except for one thing. when she commented she got a player vibe from you, you denied it. how do you know the player vibe isn't what attracted her to you.
being thought off as a player isn't a bad thing, it has worked in my favor.
We need to throw out false beliefs like "women don't like men that get around, players etc." The theory of pre-selection has nailed that false belief to the wall.

I'm not saying to be arrogant about it but you could could deny it in ****y & funny ways

"i'm not a player I just crush a lot"

For a woman to say that she has heard or feels that you give off the vibe of a player it means THAT SHE THINK YOU ARE GOOD WITH WOMEN! That is NEVER a bad thing in fact it's a great thing. You are giving off a vibe of being a sexual being rather than the vibe you don't want to give (nice guy).
 

the_stig

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Asked her out for a drink this weekend and she gave me the option of Sat or Sun. I know she said our first time out wasn't a date considering the circumstances but she must be interested on some level to be spending her time one on one with me. I'll try to take her to someplace upbeat where I can see how she reacts to some kino, as opposed to just sitting face to face. Any other tips are welcome!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Tiguere

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Bar...lounge . No nightclubs. The smaller the place the better.
 

NoCommitments

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Cool thread. Good job man.
And to everyone reading his technique just remember ONE THING!!!! there was no technique here! He was having fun, showing everyone that he's loose, he's cool, that if he gets the girl or not , hey , no big deal!
THAT IS TRUE PUA TECHNIQUE! FUN FUN FUN!!!! No pressure. No frowns.

Let us know how she bangs. lol

& don't be a douchy 'yes man' if it becomes serious! Actually..DONT GET SERIOUS!!! :nono:
 
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