Why The Pandemic was the fatal blow to the average man

[CornbreadFed]

Were there problems before the pandemic? Yes. But at least men were trying.
They were asking questions, learning how to talk to women, and putting effort into dating. You used to see posts from guys asking how to get out of the friend zone or how to stop obsessing over one girl. That kind of talk has mostly disappeared. Now it is just surface-level advice, vague talk about improving yourself, or endless complaining. What this says is that either most guys figured it out and do not need help anymore, or they gave up on women.

Here is what I think happened.


Men were removed from real life for too long
Locking young men inside for years was never going to end well. That stretch of time when guys would have developed socially, emotionally, and romantically just disappeared. They got used to isolation and most never bounced back.

There is no pressure to leave your comfort zone anymore
Most guys can go to work, come home, and do everything else from a screen. Groceries, meals, and entertainment are delivered. Dating apps give the illusion of female attention. Socializing happens through gaming, Discord, or Twitch. Now even thinking for yourself can be outsourced to AI. Life became comfortable but also stagnant.


Cope culture became a full-time hobby
Streams like Fresh and Fit, Kevin Samuels, and Rollo Tomassi exploded during lockdowns. Guys started spending hours listening to talking points that kept them angry but inactive. It was just not a phase because these creators are still uploading hour plus long live streams. Many men fill their free time with Red Pill rants, then turn around and spend money on OnlyFans for some fake sense of connection. This is not motivation. It is sedation.

Real-life social spots are full of women
Bars, gyms, and clubs are mostly filled with women now, and they are pretty receptive to being approached. Some women are getting aggressive about it. A jogger literally asked me out while I was walking my dog yesterday. The demand for stable, decent men is obviously high right now.


Quick fix advice replaced real growth
You hear things like "be a passport bro" or "go to the gym" or "just level up." These sound like solutions but do not actually build social skill or confidence. If the end goal is to find love or respect overseas, why even bother learning how to connect at home? Going to the gym/levelling up are vague answers and don't address the core of the problem which is YOU. If you believe you will be rejected no matter what, you stop improving altogether. It is paralysis wrapped in optimism.


Things have been getting worse since 2022
There was a short wave of optimism in 2021 and early 2022 when things reopened. Since then, something feels off. The country feels tired, bitter, and hopeless. People are more isolated than ever. If your life feels stuck, why risk rejection? Why try at all?
The only thing I think could fix this is something drastic. A major war, a collapse, something that forces people to change. Until then, the average man will keep slipping while the top tier of men continue to win and reproduce.


There is a word for that. It is called natural selection.

Since the end of 2022, if women are not responding to you at all, you might already be on the wrong side of that process. At this point, you either have it, or you do not.

 

[sangheilios]

There's a lot I could say in response to this but it's something I've openly talked about, both online and in real life, for several years now.

There are a ton of economic factors that are a huge part of what you are discussing here. Real estate and rental prices in once affordable states have absolutely sky rocketed since late 2020, talking places like Nevada, Arizona and Florida to name a few. A huge reason for this was because COVID ultimately lead to a mass migration throughout the country, where it forced people to flee over expensive areas to cheaper ones. Combine this with the inflation of basic goods, like groceries and gas, and you have an environment where people are very tight with their finance, living paycheck to paycheck and barely getting by. This forces people to either cut back on certain things in their life OR working more to compensate.

Imagine a guy that is under 25, barely making ends meet and working 50 hours or more per week while doing this. This guy doesn't have the time OR the resources to go out and run game or "spin plates" like the dumbasses on here talk about lol. The dude is in a perpetual state of fatigue, both physical and mental, and not in the right spot to be able to find a mate. However, cheaper distractions like alcohol, weed/drugs and video games can fill up much of his time, and they really don't involve much effort either.

I've discussed this with many people, but COVID was awful for the whole bar and nightlife scene. Vegas for instance has been having issues with decreased tourisms over the last couple years, this isn't a unique example but it's one that is relevant to this post.

You also aren't factoring in Gen Zs as a whole grew up with social media and the internet AND are overall less social than previous generations. They have incredibly high rates of otherwise manageable mental health issues, such as depression and anxiety, compared to older generations. There are also some really weird issues with this generation as well that show their dating market is royally messed up.

Nearly 30 percent of Gen Z women identify as LGBTQ: Gallup

That poll should absolutely terrify you if you understand what implications that has for the future in our lifetime.

However, I do agree with you that we are in the early stages of some sort of major genetic bottleneck where a huge number of people, particularly men, will NOT reproduce at all. It's not even so much to do with physical attributes, though for sure this does apply, but more mental characteristics. For instance, men prone to depression or substance abuse may be LESS likely to reproduce because they feel no incentive to try in life, which makes them less attractive to women, etc. However, a good chunk of this will also be circumstantial and not be because of the males in question, if 30% of the women in your age cohort are gay that really doesn't help with finding a mate lol. I've also posted this on here, but I think people with certain political leanings this applies to as well. For instance, people that are more prone to being sexually confused will NOT reproduce, whereas people that are more prone to conservative values are MORE likely to reproduce. A lot of this is based on temperament, which is a highly genetic trait.

This video touches on this.

WARNING: Why 60% of Men Give Up on Women

 

[BPH]

I agree with most of what you said, except for this point:

Real-life social spots are full of women
Bars, gyms, and clubs are mostly filled with women now, and they are pretty receptive to being approached. Some women are getting aggressive about it. A jogger literally asked me out while I was walking my dog yesterday. The demand for stable, decent men is obviously high right now.

Ever heard of joeyswoll? Probably about 75% of his content is him reacting to women who record themselves working out while focusing on dudes in the background who are minding their own business, or glancing over at her, as if she's being creeped on.

You can get canceled just for being caught looking at a woman mid-squat.

I think a significant factor in why men are afraid to approach is how easy it is to get in trouble throughout the entire seduction process. Even if you close, if she regrets it in the morning, if she cheated and needs an excuse - like most recently with the girl who accused those 5 hockey players - then your life is upended and you've got this stigma attached to you while your accuser suffers no consequences.

The irony is these same women are now complaining about not being approached, and "where have all the real men gone?" Feminists made their bed, and now they don't like sleeping in it.

Aside from that, I'd say what did the most damage to men during the pandemic was the combination of OnlyFans and social media. Any moderately attractive woman with a social media following can now make an OnlyFans where she posts as much, or as little, as she'd like, and suddenly she's a millionaire.

Now she's wealthier than 95% of the men she encounters in real life, and her DMs are flooded with celebrities, athletes, and wealthy randoms offering to fly her out and bring her to lavish dinners and parties. Why would she ever bother doing something so pedestrian as going out to meet somebody in a bar or club? She's too busy trying to decide which rich dude's yacht would make for the best photo op.

The gender roles are starting to flip, and women don't like that, but are also largely unwilling to give up their lifestyle. So now, the cream rises to the top, but the problem is massively amplified.

 

[Hal9000]

There's a lot I could say in response to this but it's something I've openly talked about, both online and in real life, for several years now.

There are a ton of economic factors that are a huge part of what you are discussing here. Real estate and rental prices in once affordable states have absolutely sky rocketed since late 2020, talking places like Nevada, Arizona and Florida to name a few. A huge reason for this was because COVID ultimately lead to a mass migration throughout the country, where it forced people to flee over expensive areas to cheaper ones. Combine this with the inflation of basic goods, like groceries and gas, and you have an environment where people are very tight with their finance, living paycheck to paycheck and barely getting by. This forces people to either cut back on certain things in their life OR working more to compensate.

Imagine a guy that is under 25, barely making ends meet and working 50 hours or more per week while doing this. This guy doesn't have the time OR the resources to go out and run game or "spin plates" like the dumbasses on here talk about lol. The dude is in a perpetual state of fatigue, both physical and mental, and not in the right spot to be able to find a mate. However, cheaper distractions like alcohol, weed/drugs and video games can fill up much of his time, and they really don't involve much effort either.

I've discussed this with many people, but COVID was awful for the whole bar and nightlife scene. Vegas for instance has been having issues with decreased tourisms over the last couple years, this isn't a unique example but it's one that is relevant to this post.

You also aren't factoring in Gen Zs as a whole grew up with social media and the internet AND are overall less social than previous generations. They have incredibly high rates of otherwise manageable mental health issues, such as depression and anxiety, compared to older generations. There are also some really weird issues with this generation as well that show their dating market is royally messed up.

Nearly 30 percent of Gen Z women identify as LGBTQ: Gallup

That poll should absolutely terrify you if you understand what implications that has for the future in our lifetime.

However, I do agree with you that we are in the early stages of some sort of major genetic bottleneck where a huge number of people, particularly men, will NOT reproduce at all. It's not even so much to do with physical attributes, though for sure this does apply, but more mental characteristics. For instance, men prone to depression or substance abuse may be LESS likely to reproduce because they feel no incentive to try in life, which makes them less attractive to women, etc. However, a good chunk of this will also be circumstantial and not be because of the males in question, if 30% of the women in your age cohort are gay that really doesn't help with finding a mate lol. I've also posted this on here, but I think people with certain political leanings this applies to as well. For instance, people that are more prone to being sexually confused will NOT reproduce, whereas people that are more prone to conservative values are MORE likely to reproduce. A lot of this is based on temperament, which is a highly genetic trait.

This video touches on this.

WARNING: Why 60% of Men Give Up on Women

Not saying youre wrong because I was definitely like this when I was in my 20s. However I don't know any guys in their 20's now who even work 40 hrs a week, much less bust their ass working OT , or two jobs. They are content to jerk off to pron and play video games all day while talking about how unfair life is because they cant graduate college and get high paying jobs despite having zero job skills.

The concept of working hard to build an independent financial life is a foreign to them as asking women out on dates, which is why they are likely to live with their mothers the rest of their lives because no worthwhile females will want to hang out with mommy's little entitled broke angel who lives the same life he lived when he was twelve.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Just sounds like a bunch of BS to excuse away all the issues from taking no responsibility for learning from past experiences and using that as feedback instead of to sit at home and do nothing.

 

[ValiantMale]

Guys just need to stop projecting for the whole consensus. I've seen this happen so often.. guys that talk about how "hard" Men have it.. and how "it sucks dating as a man"... It's all projection..

The ones who don't have it good don't seem to understand theres a whole mass of dudes enjoying a good life, being chased by women, seeing multiple girls, etc. It's not a big deal.. Some of us have just held onto our masculinity and built ourselves as men progressively for as long as we lived and thus reaped the rewards... while other men are still babies emotionally, and havent' worked on themselves enough and kinda sat in a limbo of unrealized depression, coping with all the diff digital devices and entertainment we have today that doesn't help them.

 

[SW15]

Men were removed from real life for too long
Locking young men inside for years was never going to end well. That stretch of time when guys would have developed socially, emotionally, and romantically just disappeared. They got used to isolation and most never bounced back.

The pandemic started in March 2020. By mid-2022, things were back to normal in most places.

There was a loss of roughly two years there. It's been 3+ years since things opened back up. I don't think the excuse of 2 years of lockdowns is valid anymore since there have been 3+ years of normalcy at this point.

There is no pressure to leave your comfort zone anymore
Most guys can go to work, come home, and do everything else from a screen. Groceries, meals, and entertainment are delivered. Dating apps give the illusion of female attention. Socializing happens through gaming, Discord, or Twitch. Now even thinking for yourself can be outsourced to AI. Life became comfortable but also stagnant.

Outside of AI, those things were all available in 2019.

Real-life social spots are full of women
Bars, gyms, and clubs are mostly filled with women now, and they are pretty receptive to being approached. Some women are getting aggressive about it. A jogger literally asked me out while I was walking my dog yesterday. The demand for stable, decent men is obviously high right now.

This isn't my experience. I would call this a half truth at best.

Women aren't receptive to most approaches. They wear earbuds/headphones at the gym, on walking paths, and in parks to discourage approaches. Few are sociable after fitness classes. These are trends that date back to the 2000s in some cases.

We have 2 adult generations of people with poor social skills with the Millennials and Generation Z. Millennial/Generation Z women are socially unskilled, avoid approaches, and often have anxiety/social anxiety issues.

You also aren't factoring in Gen Zs as a whole grew up with social media and the internet AND are overall less social than previous generations. They have incredibly high rates of otherwise manageable mental health issues, such as depression and anxiety, compared to older generations. There are also some really weird issues with this generation as well that show their dating market is royally messed up.

All of these were evident before the pandemic arrived. The oldest Gen Z's were already 20-22/23 when the pandemic arrived.

Generation Z's stunted social skills has been a story since the 2010s. School teachers observed it then.

 

[CornbreadFed]

The pandemic started in March 2020. By mid-2022, things were back to normal in most places.

There was a loss of roughly two years there. It's been 3+ years since things opened back up. I don't think the excuse of 2 years of lockdowns is valid anymore since there have been 3+ years of normalcy at this point.

Think of life as a downward slope. You can either climb fast or climb slow. The ones who stop climbing end up slowly going down the slope. If you sat on your ass and did nothing but indulge in porn, delivery food, and so on, then you will be severely behind the competition. Two years is a long time to be rotting. While you are rotting, there's guys growing and getting laid. I thrived during the pandemic TBH.

 

[Beyond It]

You hear things like "be a passport bro" or "go to the gym" or "just level up." These sound like solutions but do not actually build social skill or confidence. If the end goal is to find love or respect overseas, why even bother learning how to connect at home?

I read through a lot of this post. The only section I kind of disagree with is the philosophical point of the above.
AND I will always disagree with the “level up” part. It will net you nothing. You may get them interested but it’s extremely short lived.
leveling up and going to the gym should be what you are doing anyway. Tons of meatheads in the gyms who are just as clueless as most men. Occasional girlfriend who leaves fairly quickly or cheats. As a rule, both. Rich men are even more manipulated and cheated on by their girlfriend and/or wife. Don’t be delusional about the “leveling up” stupidity. Those women are f@cking down for excitement and pleasure. Think pool boys and degenerate men with non redeemable traits.

As far as the overseas, Passport Boys. ALL relationship are transactional. From the 2500 Baht you put in that cutie’s hand to the peso notes in the hand of that Filipino bombshell. This is even more apparent in the western world, IF you sit down and think about it. It’s all about extraction of resources if you are not her regular maintenance man who comes over two or three times a month to drill her out.

Nearly all that garbage from influencers is ridiculous. Haha
Savages that are broke and even mindless are killing it in the market. The more your mind is on the woman, the quicker she annihilates you because you are easy to dupe.

 

[BadBoy89]

The only thing I think could fix this is something drastic. A major war, a collapse, something that forces people to change. Until then, the average man will keep slipping while the top tier of men continue to win and reproduce.

Since the end of 2022, if women are not responding to you at all, you might already be on the wrong side of that process. At this point, you either have it, or you do not.

I was with you up until the above 2 points.

It’s funny, for all this complaining about women, gender roles flipped, online dating, ONLY FANS, porn, instagram, men lonely, I felt all of this coming to fruition way back when. I’m older and it was early 1990s, specifically 1992, where I freaking about this exact stuff. I was very young and I noticed women getting more power and weren’t being women anymore. I was acting up in school because of it because I knew, if I didn’t get 6’1, my dating life would be over. 33 years ago, I knew it. Now dating coaches and everyone is bringing up this loneliness epidemic,

But I digress, OP has good insight but offers no solutions In my opinion, the problem was way before the epidemic. The problem is birth control pill + sexual revolution + women economic and social and legal and moral power. Not saying they shouldn’t have that, but once you give wornen; the gender that can give birth, power, and you allow them to control when and where they want to pregnant, it’s a deadly combination. Combine that with the fact that they can only get pregnant with a certain time frame, and they want to get educated and have fun in time frame, it’s a bad combination .

I would say the solution is this. Women not allowed to work between 18-30. Women must get married and get pregnant between 18-30. Women have to be virgins before marriage. Women cannot divorce easily unless there is abuse.

Once a woman has delivered a healthy baby and turns 30, then she can divorce and the man pays her a set amount agreed to before the marriage. Child stays with the man.

My thoughts only.

 

[MatureDJ]

Real-life social spots are full of women
Bars, gyms, and clubs are mostly filled with women now, and they are pretty receptive to being approached. Some women are getting aggressive about it. A jogger literally asked me out while I was walking my dog yesterday. The demand for stable, decent men is obviously high right now.

Folks here seem to knock "structured singles events", but you're never going to find a better place to get a stuck-up chick to at least interact with you - oh sure, when you call her, she'll remember you are the short guy or whatever, but at least you'll get a swing at the plate.

Since the end of 2022, if women are not responding to you at all, you might already be on the wrong side of that process. At this point, you either have it, or you do not.

It's OVER for Don'tHaveItCels.

 

[Smok1nAce]

I think the social stigma of a man "needing" to be married is gone for the average man. Unless your CEO or in politics.

Also with the boomers still sitting on Mt. Olympus its basically killing prospects for young men having to "wait their turn".

Whats gonna happen when all these single men get into power in the next 20 years?

 

[Barrister]

A lot of theory about why men are striking out.

The main problem is a combination of social media having turned women’s expectations to unreasonable heights combined with the fact that, to be completely frank, a lot of men don’t know what the hell they’re doing and look terrible in the process. In fact, you can still slay these mindless drones of social media if you look good and have your life reasonably well put together. At end of the day, they still tick the same way they always have and it becomes easy to predict how they react to certain things.

The constant excuse making serves no purpose. And I won’t say that Covid didn’t change the night scene in certain cities permanently, but it certainly isn’t the reason why, in 2025, a man isn’t getting action. Thats water under the bridge in the dating world at this point.

 

[SW15]

I won’t say that Covid didn’t change the night scene in certain cities permanently, but it certainly isn’t the reason why, in 2025, a man isn’t getting action. Thats water under the bridge in the dating world at this point.

The pandemic did affect nightlife venue seduction, but nightlife seduction was already undergoing some important changes during the 2010s.

By the second half of the 2010s, fewer people were relying on nightlife venues for starting interactions. Interactions were shifting more to tech methods. Nightlife venues were being used to host tech arranged first dates rather than starting an interaction from nothing in person in the nightlife venue.

Non-bar approaching has always been a bit of a niched activity. People were doing it, but even technology was starting to cut into what we would call daygame.

Non-bar approachers have never needed bars/nightlife venues to start interactions. Non-bar approachers have needed bars as a place for their first dates and other early stage dates.

During the 2000s-2010s, the dinner date in a restaurant in the early stages seemed to fade a little bit. However, there were still (and still are today in the 2020s) plenty of beta males who will offer a woman a dinner date in a restaurant as a first date. These betas will even offer women from swipe apps these dinner dates.

 

[corrector]

Imagine a guy that is under 25, barely making ends meet and working 50 hours or more per week while doing this. This guy doesn't have the time OR the resources to go out and run game or "spin plates" like the dumbasses on here talk about lol. The dude is in a perpetual state of fatigue, both physical and mental, and not in the right spot to be able to find a mate. However, cheaper distractions like alcohol, weed/drugs and video games can fill up much of his time, and they really don't involve much effort either.

Even young people have that problem too?

 

[Scaramouche]

Hi Cornbread,
A most timely and observant post....For the Older Guys down here,things just Died with Covid,particularly Dancing the traditional place to hook up....I think we are only coming out of it just now...The Quarantine period down here,really drove home for me the value of having Plates...Lonely Ladies were just soo grateful to see Old Flames,it made being a Philander almost a calling LOL.

 

[Chow Mein]

because I knew, if I didn’t get 6’1, my dating life would be over.

I hope your perspectives have changed since high school.

 

[Divorced w 3]

These betas will even offer women from swipe apps these dinner dates.

guilty as charged lol

it resulted in sex but, the app we had a phone call which was ultimately a phone sex call, it was a love bomb situation she really blew me up - and then I crashed hard and, found Rollo and then, here I am!

my first interaction, ten days removed from my marriage, was an app-only sex hookup five minutes from my shore house. The first phone call was to confirm the address in transit

 

[BadBoy89]

I hope your perspectives have changed since high school.

My perspectives have changed, Women’s expectations have increased.

 

[Divorced w 3]

This thread seems to counter the common argument that sexual marketability is heavily in favor of women