Why No Contact is your Only Option after a Breakup

[Jariel]

You must see that every bit of it was your fault. Your responsibility. Every single day you made choices and those choices were with her I. The fundamental framework of your thinking. Those choices belong to you. Blaming her is your trap. If you don’t get out of it, congratulations, you will have a wasted life behind you.

I'm with you on this. A woman can't use, abuse or cheat on a guy unless he allows her to. Yes she might be a horrible excuse for a human being and that's on her, but if he refused to walk away that's entirely on him.

Too many people seek scapegoats for their problems and blame others for their own failures. Unless we take responsibility we can never learn or grow and will continue assuming the victim role and making the same mistakes.

 

[Jariel]

If you get into a committed and invested LTR, then you are placing your trust in a woman. The problem with this is that women are capricious and can change their mind about you in a second. This change is swift, cold and insect-like in its brutality. You are only as good as your last moment with her. Your history together means nothing to her if she is not feeling it "in the moment" with you. This is Nature, and Nature is a cold and selfish machine of survival. Nature is not sentimental. Men are sentimental and romantic and this is our downfall. Men don't want to believe it and they only truly learn through pain and suffering.

This is the biggest mistake guys make when getting into LTRs in this modern era. Men deceive themselves, become complacent, and the rug is pulled. Failing to appreciate how dark and ruthless women are is the fault of men, indeed.

So true and brilliantly put. Many of my past girlfriends appeared loving, affectionate and attentive to me for the majority of the relationship. We would have big arguments because I messaged other girls or liked an Instagram pic, or was a bit of a **** to her, but they always forgave me. But as soon as I started to go through difficult times or lose my edge, I've seen them turn cold, resentful and critical. Sometimes quite malicious.

I've never had a woman stand by me through tough times.

But the fact that women are repulsed by weakness is not a conscious choice and I accept that. I can't change that about them, rewire their unconscious mind or reprogram their DNA, but I can take responsibility for myself, stop building expectations and be realistic about the darker side of their nature.