tmpgstx
Master Don Juan
Bigfoot, women want a sensitive jerk .. think that is a good way to sum it up. Women want to see a little 'edge' or testosterone, but also want a sensitive guy who listens and cares for people.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
very well put :cheer:Originally posted by tmpgstx
Bigfoot, women want a sensitive jerk .. think that is a good way to sum it up. Women want to see a little 'edge' or testosterone, but also want a sensitive guy who listens and cares for people.
wasnt me since i am a woman hahahaOriginally posted by tmpgstx
Thanks .. i got it from articles written by women - lol! Who says women don't give good advice for attraction?
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
It only is valid with respect to how he goes about dealing with women.Originally posted by Luveno
I hate the term nice guy. I prefer doormat.
I know a guy who is like that: do anything for anyone, won't rock the boat, and will apologize if he has a different opinion than someone else. But inside you can see the frustration with life...you know every night he's wondering why things don't go his way...they should right? He's doing everything for everyone.
...wrong! He's spineless. Instead of standing up for himself, he lays down over the puddles EXPECTING people to PAY HIM BACK after they walk over him....
Do you ever feel you need to pay back the favor for your doormat? No. Its a piece of rug.
When people are doormats, they are rugs. Objects.
That's how i see it. It's not about "aiming for jerk-like", it's about "moving away from being a doormat/pushover"Originally posted by tmpgstx
I think it's just mainly important not to be a doormat. You can be nice, but don't let anyone take advantage of you.
I'm lucky that my mother was fairly neutral on this. She pro-her-children. E.g. she expects my sister's boyfriend to do things for her, but if i were busy with something and i was seeing someone and they wanted me for something, it's "no, don't drop everything for her".Originally posted by Cheat_LBJ
The hardest piece of programming to overcome for most AFCs (including myself) is the old lesson your mother beat into you that you should treat women with respect.
This is a good.Bigfoot, women want a sensitive jerk .. think that is a good way to sum it up. Women want to see a little 'edge' or testosterone, but also want a sensitive guy who listens and cares for people.
Good LORD. Could this guy embody the essence of a complete wussbag any more? This is the kind of blog a 20-something virgin would post--"I'm going to pity my way into your pretty little panties."Originally posted by sux2bu
Look what this AFC wrote on the subject! This is the problem with society and it's views on gender roles when it applies to dating.
"So what is a nice guy? Well nice guys are romantics with lyrical souls. Nice guys are generally over looked due to the lack of bulging muscles or fast cars. Nice guys won't pretend to be romantic just to get you into the sack. Nice guys are shy, that's right shy, they may go talk to you but won't ask for your number due to the lack of self esteem that history has given them. You definitely won't see a nice guy whistling at you in the mall."
:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
This guy goes on and on.. I had to stop reading and look for a bucket to puke in.
http://www.realpics.net/view.article.php?article_id=41
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
A perfect reminder of why we need to pay attention to what women DO, and not what they SAY.Nice guys will never come out tops, i think women want the nice guys....yet they want the rush, the excitement of the mean ones too, blah i don't know, i don't know what i want anymore :/