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It rang true then and still does today. To understand the argument, you MUST define "nice" as INSECURE, DESPERATE, and DISINGENUOUS. And you must define "jerk" as ****Y, CONFIDENT, and SEXUAL. These are female-contrived definitions. Too many guys get caught up in the nuances of these words. They apply their own definitions and experiences. They're not thinking about how women see it. No, women don't want violence and terror and grade-A a$$hole behavior constantly in their lives. They want masculinity, strength, and a F-all attitude.
Ever been called a jerk by woman when it's obvious she likes you? It feels great. She's digging you. But if you've been called a jerk by woman who actually is seriously upset with you, you know that what she's feeling is not attraction at that moment. She actually finds you repulsive.
There is no need to try to find some universal definition for "nice" and "jerk" that everyone will agree on. Just keep in mind the way women see it. They want the jerk that makes them laugh, turns them on, and nails them good. Or, if it makes you feel better, they want the nice guy that does the same.
Absolutely, but when one advocates jerk game to other guys, by just calling it 'jerk' game one's probably led the men to imagine something more extreme than what they really need to do. If I told you a guy should act uncaring or disinterested, or talk to her like you were talking to a male friend but lead and escalate sexually, then I think we would have less erring into the 'overcompensating d!ck' extreme of the spectrum.
To say being a jerk attracts women or being uncaring (acting uninterested, non supplicating, etc) does is saying two different things and gives two different mental images or interpretations.
Roissy is pretty clearly painting the picture that negs and being mean cause attraction in itself. I don't really buy that. And when one person made a counter-argument in just the right way that didn't offend roissy's fragile ego, he concedes "OK caring a$$hole fails and uncaring a$$hole succeeds, case closed". He could've just dropped the 'a$$hole' part and simply said "caring fails and uncaring succeeds". But he is so ego-invested with the whole 'a$$hole' idea.
And when I say a$$hole or nice is almost irrelevant, or at best icing on the cake, outside of appearance because appearance is the cause of attraction, that really offends. It's comforting to believe that picking up is all about behaving like an a$$hole and that will cause success even if you are not very visually attractive. Let's just put it this way. Ask two actors to act like a jerk using the same basic script and one will attract women and the other will appear as an unattractive jerk (in the unattractive sense of the word). The difference is appearance and the script is meaningless. I'd go so far to say give the actor with good appearance a nicer guy script and the the actor with a not so good appearance the jerk script, and the former will still succeed and the latter will still fail worse. That is a hard pill for some to swallow.And the real problem here is we have debate on what the script should be to start with lol.
