Why Men Have Given Up On Dating Women

[BaronOfHair]

Women wont come to you.

The Grim Reaper aside, NOTHING just arrives for us... We have to get out of our chair and seize whatever it is we desire. In a world where Netflixing and chilling is always just a keystroke away, this rapidly becoming a lost art though, right alongside spray painting the surveillance cameras, before knocking over The 7/11

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

well the world will just go on, nature and reality never has and never will care about mens woes, problems. Womens problems matter more

 

[BadBoy89]

Sounds like a bunch of people that have the mentality of lifelong losers.

And when you have the mentality of a loser, it should come as no surprise that you lose more often than not.

What is the mentality of a winner?

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Here to state the obvious in post #124: both mindset and non-mindset attributes matter.

Believe it or not, but multiple things can be true at once.

Here's another great revelation- the sky is blue on a sunny day.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Believe it or not, but multiple things can be true at once

We've spent so long thinking in polarities(Blue Pills and Red Pills), it's going to take awhile for us all to regain the capacity to recognize that reality exists one a continuuum, and that The Truth is almost never as definitive as we'd prefer

 

[john1234]

The dating game is totally different now. Women run the show when it comes to dating and relationships. Most of them are only going after a small group of guys.

That’s why stuff like OnlyFans blew up. The rest of the guys, like 90% of them end up turning to escorts, OnlyFans, sugar dating, porn, whatever. And they’re cool with it. A lot of them basically become doormat betas, doing whatever a girl wants just to get attention. Blowing up girls instas.

Right now, women have it pretty easy and they control the whole sexual marketplace exploiting it for all they can get. That’s why even girls who aren’t attractive can make money selling feet pics or doing weird stuff online. They are exploiting men now, just saying. Don't accept when they say they want to take things slow, dump them. No simping!

They look at men as idiots to exploit and buy them expensive things for nothing in return.

Men need to stop pedestalising women. Too many guys give women all the power. Walk away when things don’t serve you.

 

[BaronOfHair]

The dating game is totally different now

Yeah, it's gone the way of thinking critically, ESPECIALLY about "truths" we've never interrogated previously... Barely anyone engages in it

 

[Fortune_favors_the_bold]

I dont think men have given up on women, I believe they given up on the life style demanded to get and keep them.

Most guys if they happened to be a random joe in a small town and met a random jane in such place where they leave home at morning and come back in the late afternoon then spend the rest of the day together relaxing, would probably be fine with that.
He hits the gym, she has a coffee with her female friends or family then both at home for dinner.

The issue are the dopamine receptors of female brains that are fried already in their mid 20s which make them to demand limitless entertainment, drama, attention and stimulation where nothing is enough let alone coming from the same man.
Socialization without barriers both online and offline, the over extrovert girl that needs to interact with anyone when you go out is a good example of an item that stresses most guys.

It's like dealing with an autistic kid that screams when you turn off the tv or decrease the volume at night.

 

[Solomon]

I will say this men who are unsuccessful with women have given up on women. Men who are successful are having the best time of their lives. I think a lot of men struggle simply cause they haven't put in the work. I came on sosuave when I was 24 years old and busted my ass to get laid doing thousands of approaches. I get it it's a different era now but this era is easier if you know what you're doing. I'm 41 now and I'm having an easier time dating than ever before and the women are hotter too

It's all about perspective

 

[john1234]

I will say this men who are unsuccessful with women have given up on women. Men who are successful are having the best time of their lives. I think a lot of men struggle simply cause they haven't put in the work. I came on sosuave when I was 24 years old and busted my ass to get laid doing thousands of approaches. I get it it's a different era now but this era is easier if you know what you're doing. I'm 41 now and I'm having an easier time dating than ever before and the women are hot...

It's all about perspective

So what is your definition of men who are successful with women?

 

[Solomon]

So what is your definition of men who are successful with women?

That's subjective but a man who is able to get the types of women that he wants or relationships. For most guys on the forum the bare minimum is sexual access. To me that's not success but part of the package.

 

[john1234]

Successful or not, modern dating feels like such a time waster sometimes.

Matched with a girl on a dating app, spent ages messaging back and forth, tidy up the house and all that then finally got her to come over and she shows up looking at least 10 years older, smoking fags on the meeting and nothing like her pics.

Stuff like this is exactly why so many guys are losing interest in online dating women.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Matched with a girl on a dating app, spent ages messaging back and forth, tidy up the house and all that then finally got her to come over and she shows up looking at least 10 years older, smoking fags on the meeting and nothing like her pics.

This was a running joke regarding OLD even back in The 2000s. What compels so many of us to expect things would be any different on this front is more perplexing than folks feigning confusion as to why Clarke, Reece, and Griner(And she's famous for her arrest record, not her feats on court) are THE ONLY names out of women's basketball that've achieved widespread recognitio

 

[Clockwerk50]

Successful or not, modern dating feels like such a time waster sometimes.

Matched with a girl on a dating app, spent ages messaging back and forth, tidy up the house and all that then finally got her to come over and she shows up looking at least 10 years older, smoking fags on the meeting and nothing like her pics.

Stuff like this is exactly why so many guys are losing interest in online dating women.

Damn, that sucks.

But how are you going to get laid if you are going to bow out of online dating? Can’t be masturbating everyday till you die :/

 

[BadBoy89]

I think a lot of men struggle simply cause they haven't put in the work.

The issue is, for a lot of men, it’s not a cause and effect thing. It’s not “put in the work“ = “get hot women“. Its ”put in the work“ = “maybe you will get a woman who is barely a mid and has slept with the football team but now won’t allow access to her body until 20 dates in and she decides he has earned it.”

The investment is not worth the return.

I'm 41 now and I'm having an easier time dating than ever before and the women are hotter too

I never get that.

I never get men who are older do better with women. In my opinion, the absolute best time for a man to get with hot women is in his late 20s. That was, for me, the best time. I went out the hottest women you could imagine, I didn’t have much money and wasn’t 6’0, but still got with them. It was so easy for me in my late 20s.

Now I’m in my 40s, I have lots of money, I have game, dress OK, hair decent, I’m not 6’0. I got women telling me off, telling me off by text after coffee dates when I haven’t asked for a 2nd date or done anything offensive.

Im having the hardest time dating than ever before. It’s easiest when a man is in his 20s. It is hardest when a man is in his 30s and 40s.

 

[Smok1nAce]

women lie, treat most men like trash, drama, bad attitudes, unattractive behavior and bodies

its very hard to be a captain save a hoe nowadays to the point your life is significantly worse if you participate.

If you have a good head on your shoulders, sane and believe in being a good person the dating market is an apocalypse of zombies.

and in most zombie movies your best bet is to stay in your house and bunker down.

to relate it to real life your going to constantly be disappointed.

 

[Solomon]

The issue is, for a lot of men, it’s not a cause and effect thing. It’s not “put in the work“ = “get hot women“. Its ”put in the work“ = “maybe you will get a woman who is barely a mid and has slept with the football team but now won’t allow access to her body until 20 dates in and she decides he has earned it.”

The investment is not worth the return.

If you're out of shape and want to date women, your success is most likely to improve if you work out. Especially as a younger man
I Know a guy who has rich parents is 35 years old, works a ****ty part time job, smokes weed all day has no ambition. This guy's parents don't give him money because they want him to learn what work ethic is. Instead of embracing this mentality, busting his butt and saving money so he can get his own place. This guy doubled down on whining to his parents and doing more counterproductive things I.e., spending more money on weed, and playing videos games. This guy has had girlfriends before, has no issues talking/dating women but now that he's in his mid-30s he's not getting the type of women that he wants. Do you think most women should give him a chance cause he's nice even though he's an ambitionless bum? you don't think if the guy stopped smoking weed, focused on getting out of his parents he would have better options in dating? There is a sizeable group of men who are their mid-30s like this guy still living with his parents.

Getting better with women isn't black and white, I'll concede that, however,r most men aren't even trying and that's just the truth.

Now I’m in my 40s, I have lots of money, I have game, dress OK, hair decent, I’m not 6’0. I got women telling me off, telling me off by text after coffee dates when I haven’t asked for a 2nd date or done anything offensive.

Im having the hardest time dating than ever before. It’s easiest when a man is in his 20s. It is hardest when a man is in his 30s and 40s.

Sounds like you're meeting women of swipe apps, if it's harder for you, at 40 then you gotta ask yourself are you in the same shape you were in your 20s? or are you the Dad bod guy now? Is your game really as good as you think it is? Have you learned to adapt to the changing mating market? Has your attitude become more jaded and bitter, which happens sometimes as a man grows older? Are you dealing with life issues that could affect your confidence?

These are the types of questions a lot of guys refuse to ask themselves and answer honestly. I suggest that you take some time for self-introspection and and self-reflection. As you get older you should have more wisdom and understanding than your 20s, especially when it comes to women. Women should be easy to deal with due to your experiences.. That doesn't mean that women are perfect or that you will bang everyone but you should be able to recognize or vet women who have high interest in you.

 

[The Duke]

Successful or not, modern dating feels like such a time waster sometimes.

Matched with a girl on a dating app, spent ages messaging back and forth, tidy up the house and all that then finally got her to come over and she shows up looking at least 10 years older, smoking fags on the meeting and nothing like her pics.

Stuff like this is exactly why so many guys are losing interest in online dating women.

I get that it happens. It used to happen to me, but as I improved my skills I kept myself out of those situations. Always take stock in the situation and ask what can be done to prevent this from happening again.

Dating in my 40's has never been easier but every thing about me that attracts women is better than its ever been minus a little age on my face but it doesn't seem to matter. I'm with @Solomon.

 

[SW15]

This was a running joke regarding OLD even back in The 2000s.

Yes, that's true. People will still use outdated photos on profiles.

as I improved my skills I kept myself out of those situations. Always take stock in the situation and ask what can be done to prevent this from happening again.

I think my skills improvement is a reason why I've encountered fewer IHABs in the last 15 years.

 

[The Duke]

Yes, that's true. People will still use outdated photos on profiles.



I think my skills improvement is a reason why I've encountered fewer IHABs in the last 15 years.

I'd say eventually you develop some instincts that serve you well. You've been there, seen it all, done it all. You can start to recognize the nuances of situations and adjust accordingly.