why do single women tend to seduce married men all the time?

[picard]

why do single women tend to seduce married men all the time?


I know a few married guys who were seduced by single women.

 

[zekko]

Being taken makes a man more desirable. It gives him some value

The opposite is also true: the guy could be taken BECAUSE he's more desireable and valuable.
It could be cause or effect.

It's just like when you walk into a room your eyes go to the best looking (and thus most valuable) girl in the room. Well, chances are she's taken (because she's valuable). Same thing with women. When they see the most valuable guy in the room they want him. But again, chances are he's already taken (because he's valuable).

 

[picard]

Do women judge a guy to be valuable base on his wealth?

 

[Mike32ct]

It's a combination of things.

1. People who are "taken" are usually very confident around the opposite sex because they usually aren't trying to pick someone up. So a married guy is a breath of fresh air to her compared to the all the nervous horny single guys trying desperately to get into her pants. This is attractive.

2. If a woman was willing to marry (and presumably have sex with him), then he must have something going for him. This gives him value.

3. He must have some experience with women and sex.

4. It's taboo. The idea of her being attractive enough to get a married guy to cheat turns her on.

5. Since he's taken, she can have finally have discreet no strings sex. He has every reason to keep things quiet and most of all, he won't turn into a Stage 4 clinger (i.e. turn really needy) like some single guys after they get laid.

6. A married guy is probably a much lower STD risk (than a random bar guy) since he has presumably been in a monogamous relationship for a while. So she'll probably raw dog him.

 

[Boilermaker]

^^

I like your insights. Very analytical and crisp.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Picard,
Sure there is always going to be the Girl who just wants to prove she is more desirable than another,and will steal her Man to prove it...But there are some Women who just don't want a full on relationship and find a Married Man secure....Then there is the odd Girl particularly when her boss is concerned,who will do what she is told to curry favour,check out the proportion of Women who have slept with their boss.

 

[zekko]

check out the proportion of Women who have slept with their boss.

The boss is the alpha male of the group. Sometimes called the "Situational Alpha" because he is the alpha in that situation. And we know women have a tendency to go for the leader.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Married guys tend to present the appearance that they don't care. They don't care that a woman is an HB 9, they know who they're ƒucking that night. They don't care how a single woman takes blunt, but truthful observations about women, they know who they're ƒucking that night. They don't care about her increasingly more blatant plays for his attention, they know who they're ƒucking that night. Single guys tend to walk on eggshells, tempering every word, and hoping to identify themselves with a woman in some perfect formula hoping she'll find him acceptable enough to ƒuck. Married guys, generally, have no such motivation and therefore nothing to lose by being indifferent.

Married men inadvertently become (or at least present the appearance of) who they should've been while single; insanely, unapologetically and confidently indifferent to women. Essentially they become the irresistible Jerk that women love, all because they know who they're ƒucking that night. But single women can't grasp this reservation in married men. All they see is a guy whom they can't seem to qualify themselves to enough.

Subconsciously, for the first time in his life most likely, he's got nothing to lose by being indifferent to women, or even experimenting with being brutally honest with them, and women eat this up. It pricks their imaginations about him; "Is he really immune to my sexuality? He seems so cavalier about it, is he really like this? No wonder some other woman married him." It's not that he's always been some incorrigible rake, he simply has nothing to lose and this manifests in his attitude.

This then becomes a point of attraction for women as well as a challenge to her. We only chase what runs away from us.

This dynamic is exactly why I advocate Plate Theory. A guy with a rotation of 2-3 reliable girls isn't going to care about how a 4th girl responds to his Alpha confidence, not matter how shocking, because he knows who he's ƒucking that night.

 

[zekko]

This dynamic is exactly why I advocate Plate Theory. A guy with a rotation of 2-3 reliable girls isn't going to care about how a 4th girl responds to his Alpha confidence, not matter how shocking, because he knows who he's ƒucking that night.

I agree with you of course, but I should point out that if you have one steady girlfriend the effect is the same: you know who you are fvcking that night.

By the way, it is always put forward on this forum that being indifferent to a woman and her sexuality is attractive to women. While this is a valid point, there's another side to this coin that I don't think I've ever seen discussed here: Sometimes a woman will like you BECAUSE you respond to her and her sexuality. We like those who like us, and women are not always the polar opposite to this.

 

[5string]

why do single women tend to seduce married men all the time?


I know a few married guys who were seduced by single women.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=177311

 

[squirrels]

5. Since he's taken, she can have finally have discreet no strings sex. He has every reason to keep things quiet and most of all, he won't turn into a Stage 4 clinger (i.e. turn really needy) like some single guys after they get laid.

The problem is that MANY married cheaters do JUST THAT.

I've always said I can see a place for a guy to have extramarital sex...IF he can keep it out of his personal life. If he bangs his secretary at work, it's not a big deal as long as he comes home to his wife and kids. (and stays "safe") But if he starts spending "long nights at the office", or spending time and money he OUGHT to be spending on his family on buying gifts for this new woman, taking her places, etc...then he has clearly abused the privilege of extramarital relations.

That's why you see the classic tragedy of the married guy who gets a piece of "strange" because he's not looking, then suddenly becomes chumpishly affixed to this new woman and loses BOTH her AND the wife. He loses the wife because he cheated and he loses the mistress because he's a chump.

Something to think about.

 

[MatureDJ]

It's a combination of things.

1. People who are "taken" are usually very confident around the opposite sex because they usually aren't trying to pick someone up. So a married guy is a breath of fresh air to her compared to the all the nervous horny single guys trying desperately to get into her pants. This is attractive.

2. If a woman was willing to marry (and presumably have sex with him), then he must have something going for him. This gives him value.

3. He must have some experience with women and sex.

4. It's taboo. The idea of her being attractive enough to get a married guy to cheat turns her on.

5. Since he's taken, she can have finally have discreet no strings sex. He has every reason to keep things quiet and most of all, he won't turn into a Stage 4 clinger (i.e. turn really needy) like some single guys after they get laid.

6. A married guy is probably a much lower STD risk (than a random bar guy) since he has presumably been in a monogamous relationship for a while. So she'll probably raw dog him.

Excellent analysis!

 

[Zarky]

Zarky's ultimate law of the universe:

Women attract women.

All other rules derive from it.

 

[jophil28]

I absolutely disagree that single women fuk married men "all the time".
Most single women I know would studiously avoid hitting on a married man even though she might be attracted to him. I have seen a few women go for some mild flirting but it usually stops there.
Just because his "indifference" may push her buttons does not mean that she will act on her feelings.

Another urban myth in my opinion

 

[azanon]

5. Since he's taken, she can have finally have discreet no strings sex. He has every reason to keep things quiet and most of all, he won't turn into a Stage 4 clinger (i.e. turn really needy) like some single guys after they get laid.

There's one more angle I'd add that relates to your #5. That angle is power.

A single woman with a married guy is in a position of power because he usually has much more to lose than she does. Assuming, of course, that he values his marriage, he has essentially NO power once he gives her any sort of evidence that he's been with her. And really no evidence is needed, given the proven effectiveness of dialing the married person's digits and casually mentioning to his wife that she's enjoying f******* her husband.

And if the married guy gets the single girl pregnant? That sentence is 18 to life, and possibly also a divorce for the man for cheating, which could mean a loss of his net worth/2 + all his kids.

Married guys so inclined to cheat would do themselves a great service to either 1. Simply not do it or 2. Choose a MARRIED woman who loves her husband and preferably has a few kids too, and a churchy reputation. These kind of women keep their mouths shut, and if you inpregnate them, you only owe them 2 things; jack and s***.

........
I finally took the advice of many here and read 48 laws of power. I can't help but think about so many things now in terms of power.

 

[Buddha_Mind]

I think it's mostly been covered here -- it's because a man who is married is mostly seen as a man of "value", that is, he is paying the bills, doing the responsible things, and getting p*ssy. Women are attracted to this -- they want those things for themselves, and some women can be very catty and step over one another to get the "providing" man.

Clearly, also being physically attractive or in shape or motivated in life is going to be a big factor here. Being "married" but having a beer guy and drool down your chin isn't going to stage this.

I think the truth is if you are married, and you are doing things right, you will always have women who want to be in the place of your wife. It's straight up envy. And a real man must pick and make his decisions wisely.

 

[azanon]

I absolutely disagree that single women fuk married men "all the time".
Most single women I know would studiously avoid hitting on a married man even though she might be attracted to him. I have seen a few women go for some mild flirting but it usually stops there.
Just because his "indifference" may push her buttons does not mean that she will act on her feelings.

Another urban myth in my opinion

You're from Australia? Hell, for all we know, that may be true over there. Different continents definitely equal different cultures.

Being a married guy myself, and recalling my single past, I have to vouch for a lot of what RT said. Then again, at least part of it is also education (thanks SS). I'm confident as hell now, but ya know..... RT said it, I have nothing to lose because he's right... I'm getting some p**** tonight.

 

[IamMyownMan]

I absolutely disagree that single women fuk married men "all the time".
Most single women I know would studiously avoid hitting on a married man even though she might be attracted to him. I have seen a few women go for some mild flirting but it usually stops there.
Just because his "indifference" may push her buttons does not mean that she will act on her feelings.

Another urban myth in my opinion

Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.

 

[zekko]

I absolutely disagree that single women fuk married men "all the time".
Most single women I know would studiously avoid hitting on a married man even though she might be attracted to him. I have seen a few women go for some mild flirting but it usually stops there.
Just because his "indifference" may push her buttons does not mean that she will act on her feelings.

Another urban myth in my opinion

I think it depends on the woman.
Some woman will go after any man they find attractive and they don't care if they're married or not.
Some women will flirt with the married man but will not take it further than that (most women probably are in this category).
Some women will respect the sanctity of marriage and step off (probably not many of these left these days).

 

[5string]

This is a something I have thought about lately.

I have been married now for about two years. My wife is very attractive. I'm in my early 50's. When I go out with Mrs.5string, the other women notice her first, at least I think so. Then they notice me. Now mind you I don't cheat, but, I do get hit on quite a bit. No question in my mind that I could escalate on some of these gals and get the job done if I wanted to.

I think they see me with a really good looking wife in designer jeans and heels and automatically think I have a higher value. Thus, the IL goes up bigtime. They MUST be thinking that I have alot to offer to have landed a wife like that. It's interesting to say the least.

Some, who know us, know where we live and what I do for a living. That get's the IL up even more. Plus I'm a social guy by my nature. Put all that together, and many just don't care. These women desire what they cannot have (at least as in my case). No question that many would sleep with a married guy. It's a conquest thing I imagine on their part. A game if you will.

Mrs.5string gets hit on as well. I have to admit that this all creates a healthy mix of competition anxiety between us both. I think that's a good thing.