Why do broken girls sabotage their relationships.

alvinkels

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Why do broken girls sabotage their relationships even though it might be what will save them?


I have always enjoyed my relationships with girls that are from good homes; homes that mum respects dad and both parents play their roles and there is love for everyone.

I have always regretted giving girls who dads were absent or from broken homes or homes where mum is the leader, a chance in my life. They cause me most headaches.

I am not saying the former don't cause some troubles. Even though they do they are aware of them do it is fun and playful and they quickly forget about and have fun. ( remember the scene from Friends where Chandler thought Monica was going to break up with him) that is what I am talking about.

For the latter, they egotistic, stubborn unforgiving, drama queens and never aware of what they actions and inactions will do to you and end up blaming you for it.

Please avoid them at costs. DON'T BE CAPTAIN SAVE-A-*****!
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Why do broken girls sabotage their relationships even though it might be what will save them?
See my comment in another thread, it might give you a clue.
 

Ricky

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I don’t know the answer either
 

BaronOfHair

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Why do broken girls sabotage their relationships even though it might be what will save them?
Same reason broken men do likewise. Both have yet to absorb the wisdom of Amy Lee and Seether
 

BackInTheGame78

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You aren't "saving them".

The mistake is believing they WANT what a normal person has to offer. They don't.

What they WANT and LIKE is being treated like trash because that's what they believe their worth is.

You think there is something wrong with them but you don't realize they think there is something wrong with YOU.

You can't fix broken women, you can only walk away as soon as they tell you the major red flags. Most guys refuse to do this tho which is where they get into trouble.

You knew early on that you needed to walk away, but you didn't.
 
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alvinkels

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You aren't "saving them".

The mistake is believing they WANT what a normal person has to offer. They don't.

What they WANT and LIKE is being treated like trash because that's what they believe their worth is.

You think there is something wrong with them but you don't realize they think there is something wrong with YOU.

You can't fix broken women, you can only walk away as soon as they tell you the major red flags. Most guys refuse to do this tho which is where they get into trouble.

You knew early on that you needed to walk away, but you didn't.
Yea it is a lesson well learned
 

Solomon

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You aren't "saving them".

The mistake is believing they WANT what a normal person has to offer. They don't.

What they WANT and LIKE is being treated like trash because that's what they believe their worth is.

You think there is something wrong with them but you don't realize they think there is something wrong with YOU.

You can't fix broken women, you can only walk away as soon as they tell you the major red flags. Most guys refuse to do this tho which is where they get into trouble.

You knew early on that you needed to walk away, but you didn't.
This took me a long time to figure out, if a woman tells me about her ex(es) I can tell you what type of woman she is especially how she talks about him i.e. if she bashes him or not, if she takes accountability most don't.

Water seeks it's own level

A lot of men want to be with women when they are unequally yoked and this is how you end up in divorce court, family court etc

A lot of guys stay in hopes of sniffing the panties in the long run a lot of them learn the hard way that it's not worth it

I think even when I was "Green" you kind of knew the women that a relationship would work with and the ones that were just good for fun
 

The Duke

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I used to date a lot of crazy chics several years ago and most all of these girls would sabotage our relationship and thats typically how it ended. It was their way of ending the relationship. They didn't have the skills to discuss the issues, so they just created them to drive you away. Its easier for them.

Typically the issues surfaced when they first started to get attached and they saw there was a clear difference in their level of relationship skills vs. my level of skills. Many of these girls came from broken homes, and grew up in some form of dysfunction.

These girls all had self-esteem issues, trust issues. They would sabotage to create distance and disengage. No relationship or a surface relationship helped them feel more secure about themselves than something solid.

This can all be traced back to childhood. Its what their parent(s) did or didn't teach them at home.

I'll never forget the one that told me "you're better than me". At the time I had no idea what that meant and I didn't see it that way. But over the years, its what broken women with poor relationship skills tells somebody that has superior skills. These women know that someday you will figure out who they really are and will dump them. And they are right. We should thank them when they try to sabotage. Realize what that looks like and understand the meaning behind it. And thats when you get up and leave.

It took me a few times before I recognized their tactics and realized it was something more than girls being dramatic. I've finally learned to spot that signs right out of the gate. I might fuhk one of those a few times but I'm not giving them any more than 6.6". ;-)
 
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AmsterdamAssassin

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I'll never forget the one that told me "you're better than me". At the time I had no idea what that meant and I didn't see it that way. But over the years, its what broken women with poor relationship skills tells somebody that has superior skills. These women know that someday you will figure out who they really are and will dump them. And they are right. We should thank them when they try to sabotage. Realize what that looks like and understand the meaning behind it. And thats when you get up and leave.
I actually mentioned that to a woman who told me I deserved someone better. I agreed and told her that I would eventually see through her deception and dump her.
That shocked her and then she tried to make up to me that she wasn't being deceptive and she was afraid I'd get bored of her.
I told her I wouldn't get bored with her. I already was bored with her.
 

alvinkels

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I used to date a lot of crazy chics several years ago and most all of these girls would sabotage our relationship and thats typically how it ended. It was their way of ending the relationship. They didn't have the skills to discuss the issues, so they just created them to drive you away. Its easier for them.

Typically the issues surfaced when they first started to get attached and they saw there was a clear difference in their level of relationship skills vs. my level of skills. Many of these girls came from broken homes, and grew up in some form of dysfunction.

These girls all had self-esteem issues, trust issues. They would sabotage to create distance and disengage. No relationship or a surface relationship helped them feel more secure about themselves than something solid.

This can all be traced back to childhood. Its what their parent(s) did or didn't teach them at home.

I'll never forget the one that told me "you're better than me". At the time I had no idea what that meant and I didn't see it that way. But over the years, its what broken women with poor relationship skills tells somebody that has superior skills. These women know that someday you will figure out who they really are and will dump them. And they are right. We should thank them when they try to sabotage. Realize what that looks like and understand the meaning behind it. And thats when you get up and leave.

It took me a few times before I recognized their tactics and realized it was something more than girls being dramatic. I've finally learned to spot that signs right out of the gate. I might fuhk one of those a few times but I'm not giving them any more than 6.6". ;-)
She told me the same thing!

And you are right form my experience it those type of girls that create problems
 

Vanderdonck

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You aren't "saving them".

The mistake is believing they WANT what a normal person has to offer. They don't.

What they WANT and LIKE is being treated like trash because that's what they believe their worth is.

You think there is something wrong with them but you don't realize they think there is something wrong with YOU.

You can't fix broken women, you can only walk away as soon as they tell you the major red flags. Most guys refuse to do this tho which is where they get into trouble.

You knew early on that you needed to walk away, but you didn't.
One thousand fukking percent.

And as a PSA, this won't always take the form of toxicity and it doesn't have to be dramatic. Some girls will seem sweet and normal except for the fact that they've chosen men poorly. Doesn't matter if their childhood was normal or not. One bad early decision can set them on a lousy path.

They will cling to their identities and always find a way to self sabotage. This is why you being "high value" will not always translate to her being interested - she thinks she doesn't deserve you.
 

Divorced w 3

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The better question is, what are you personally doing to create better, more sustainable, healthier relationships; or put differently, what went wrong to have this happen and did we make the necessary adjustments to screen better moving forward?
 
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