Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Why can't the *****es keep their mouths shut at 4 in the am.

A

Alicorn

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When either of the women I'm currently living with come downstairs this early in the morning they both do the same thing: fem1 says "hey" and fem2 says "good morning Alicorn."

So can you tell me why I want to tell both of them to shut the **** up?

The other guy that lives here? He's a man, he doesn't say ****. Why do the *****es have to say anything at all? Do they not understand how tired I am and how my brain barely functions right about how and how ****ing desctracting that **** is. So distracting I can't even spell the goddamn word correctly.

Why can't women just please shut the **** up at 4-in-the-omg-wtf-am-I-doing-up morning.

Why do I think one day such bad habits on the part of women will one day get me killed?

"Good morning Alicorn"

****ING BANG A SNIPER JUST SHOT MY ****ING HEAD OFF WITH A MORTAR ROUND THAT HE LAUNCHED FROM THE HIP BECAUSE YOU GAVE AWAY MY ****ING POSITION BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE ****ING NEED TO FEEL SOCIALLY CONNECTED YOU DUMB *****ES AND YOUR DUMB ****ING FEELINGS

If the sniper don't get me that's ok 'cuz here come the ****ing ninjas you just pissed off by saying something this ****ing early. In fact they made a temporary truce with their natural enemies, the pirates, and now here come the ****ing pirates to sodomize me with their ****ing cutlass swords.
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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D

diplomatic_lies

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Man I wish people would stop looking at me. I was on the bus the other day when this old woman glanced at me. I got so pissed that I pulled out a giant dildo and smash the woman's face with it! Arrrghh!!
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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C

cant think of a user name

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Originally posted by diplomatic_lies
Man I wish people would stop looking at me. I was on the bus the other day when this old woman glanced at me. I got so pissed that I pulled out a giant dildo and smash the woman's face with it! Arrrghh!!
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I saw the same thing the other day. Except it was the train and it was some doped-up 12 yr old kid smashing an old lady in the face with a rolled up newspaper. She moved seats.
 
T

The_Next_Big_Thing

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Originally posted by Alicorn
When either of the women I'm currently living with come downstairs this early in the morning they both do the same thing: fem1 says "hey" and fem2 says "good morning Alicorn."

So can you tell me why I want to tell both of them to shut the **** up?

The other guy that lives here? He's a man, he doesn't say ****. Why do the *****es have to say anything at all? Do they not understand how tired I am and how my brain barely functions right about how and how ****ing desctracting that **** is. So distracting I can't even spell the goddamn word correctly.

Why can't women just please shut the **** up at 4-in-the-omg-wtf-am-I-doing-up morning.

Why do I think one day such bad habits on the part of women will one day get me killed?

"Good morning Alicorn"

****ING BANG A SNIPER JUST SHOT MY ****ING HEAD OFF WITH A MORTAR ROUND THAT HE LAUNCHED FROM THE HIP BECAUSE YOU GAVE AWAY MY ****ING POSITION BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE ****ING NEED TO FEEL SOCIALLY CONNECTED YOU DUMB *****ES AND YOUR DUMB ****ING FEELINGS

If the sniper don't get me that's ok 'cuz here come the ****ing ninjas you just pissed off by saying something this ****ing early. In fact they made a temporary truce with their natural enemies, the pirates, and now here come the ****ing pirates to sodomize me with their ****ing cutlass swords.
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CHILL OUT!!! Your not a morning person.

By nature, people are social critters. That is all they are doing is trying to act friendly and nice and social . How do they know that they are making you upset? They are not mindreaders.

Personally, I am a morning person and i talk to everyone I can in the morning. People get pissed off at me for being so cheery in the morning but you know what? that is me.

This is apparently what they are as well. Just accept that they are morning types.

If you don't like something then just tell them that they are making you unhappy. Either they will quit it out of respect or they will continue to do it and be b!tchy about it.

You seem like you have to much built up anger at everything. Have some cheerios and enjoy life.
 
D

diplomatic_lies

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Morning people should die. The bad thing is, they're never awake at night when the rest of us Nighters are up n' bright.
 
S

spider_007

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there is something about the morning sun, that just makes you wana sit on the padio from the time it rises till noon time...:p (too bad i never see the morning sun, i get up at 5 and i'm at work at 6:30
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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splinterkb

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Is there something wrong with being social? They're just trying to be friendly man, you should return the favor... after all, you do LIVE with them.
 
A

Alicorn

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Sorry for taking so long to respond everyone, the pirates and ninjas finally left after they had some tea and ****ing crumpets. I was sodomized by the pirates and wtf am I supposed to do with my peanutbuttery eyeballs now?

WHAT I ASK YOU!?


Originally posted by C00L
wtf u doin up at 4am anyway.
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It's the normal time I have to get up for work.
 
D

Derek Flint

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Grow a pair and tell them that 4 AM isn't an ideal time to be exchanging pleasantries when other people are trying to sleep.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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B

blackbirdbeatle

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Looks like someone has the case of the Mondays.:kick: :woo:
 
P

PRMoon

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haha this reminds me of last weekend when my room mates friends were in town. I had had a long enough saturaday night (out till 3 am drunk as hell and passed out) and was trying to sleep. Around 5:30am the door to my room flings open and snapps me out of my drunken coma. The guy says to me "Hey man I just scored some coke, you wanna do some and head back down to the strip?" of course I declined as I was still drunk and I needed to get some sleep in (also unless you're on serious drugs there's not a whole lot to do on the stripp at that time during the morning). Late night is one thing but just because the town is 24 hours doesn't mean the occupants have to follow suit.
 
C

Centaurion

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:eek:

Damn, I gotta get my ass to Sin City.


Yeah, I also hate those mofos that are all cheery in the early hours of the morning. I was close to punching this ****er living at my dorm this morning. I was heading for my room, drunk and jacked up as hell, when this ****ing homo just pops in front of me and pats me on the back and goes "HOWDY MATE!!!!!" with this really annoying cheery ass voice. He was heading back from his morning run.

I told him to go **** himself and slept for 2 hours before getting my ass over to Uni to sit my Macro-econ final.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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