"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Why can't I get myself to go out more?

Boschy

Senior Don Juan
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BlahBBlah, I recommend reading a book called Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman. It puts what you are feeling into perspective. I got over shyness by thinking this: I hate being the centre of attention. But being shy draws attention to me, therefore I will pretend not to be shy. After a while, the pretending became second nature. In other words, I had conditioned myself not to react with terror in social situations.

When you arrived at that party, you should have immediately smiled, opened your arms wide and said loudly, "Hello!! I'm heeere!!!" Then gone to the nearest party people and introduced yourself if you didn't already know them. Also, believe me, most people at the start of a party are a bit tense, especially when they know others are there who they don't know. Bluff is your friend.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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BlahBBlah

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Are there any e-books that talk about the same sort of thing? How about an e-book that discusses about how to become better at conversations and establishing connections with other people in general?
 

Boschy

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There may be some self-help e-books out there. Look at Amazon. Nothing beats real life practice, though. Get out there and jump into the fire. The book I recommended will give you an excellent grounding for how the emotional mind works in neurological terms. For instance, the amygdala is the key piece of grey jelly for most of our extreme emotions and dysfunctions, including chronic shyness.

Nothing wrong with a reading paper book...this one by Goleman should still be in print. Do I have to get the cattle prod out? Sheeze, you may meet a cute girl at the bookshop!!!!
 

Tha Realnezz

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MAybe cuz you don't have any male freinds or you don't like the ones you have.

I don't like hanging by myself and a couple broads too much either.I've always preffered hanging out with other males,no homo.
 
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