Why attractiveness rating in men is a coping mechanism

[New_Journey]

You guys don't fvcking get it. Fvcking hell open your minds, kill your $tupid ego.

Women don't value men solely by looks, gentlemen, stop projecting things onto women, its not real, it is all a lie, its your ego.

Biology is all what matters, whatever/whoever created us, created us for a purpose, the purpose is to keep humans alive, is to keep replicating. Men and Women are different, we are made this way so the human race will be alive. The modern world, the shift of technology and incorrect parenting have complicated everything and everyone is confused in a world that is not made for our biology. Why do you think birthrates keep declining everywhere?

Men's biology is to fvck and spread their seeds, we are aroused by a hot body/face to fvck and attracted by nice submissive attitude to raise children (LTR material).

Women's biology is to secure the best children with the best men. They don't value men only for looks, value in their eyes represent arousal and attraction just like men do, but they're measured differently.

Women are aroused to (fvck) have children by a combination of face, physique and masculinity (frame, charm, leadership), they are attracted to things that give them security for her and her children, having his life together, emotional intelligence, ambition, drive, typically these types of guy are okay financially.

We are never gonna be a 9 or 10, this the card we have dealt with, it is fine, have you seen the $hitty lives fueled by drama those people have? I certainly don't wanna be one of those. There are 8b of people, lets say 1% of those are 9-10, that leave 7.8b on the planet who cluster in the mean, let them find themselves, they are not important.

Throughout the generations we have forgotten the actual value a man brings to a woman, with the propaganda we think genders are interchangeable, gentlemen, they are not. We are the pillars of society, without us, everything collapses. The value we provide is real, it can be increased, we have been brainwashed into thinking is only by looks, it is not.

 

[New_Journey]

The 5’s through 8’s should be 4-7.

Because you say so? From 1-9 there are 10 numbers, and the mean is 5, so unless you have something statistical to change my mind why not to use the mean, and not your insecurity, we can talk.

Doesn’t 9 or 10 apply to the most sexually desirable men on earth (eg, Brad Pitt, Mel Gibson, Sean Connery)?

Looks wise yes, do you wanna be a 9-10 in looks? and Why?

 

[Manure Spherian]

Looks wise yes, do you wanna be a 9-10 in looks? and Why?

It’s not something I think about much and it cannot be achieved. I’m OK with how I look.

Those men are also extremely high status. They are rich, famous, and known throughout the world.

 

[Manure Spherian]

Women's biology is to secure the best children with the best men. They don't value men only for looks, value in their eyes represent arousal and attraction just like men do, but they're measured differently.

Women are aroused to (fvck) have children by a combination of face, physique and masculinity (frame, charm, leadership), they are attracted to things that give them security for her and her children, having his life together, emotional intelligence, ambition, drive, typically these types of guy are okay financially.

So I actually do get it. I have repeatedly stated a men's SMV/attractiveness is not based solely on looks.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Because you say so? From 1-9 there are 10 numbers, and the mean is 5, so unless you have something statistical to change my mind why not to use the mean, and not your insecurity, we can talk.

Nothing to do with ‘insecurity’. I just disagree with those ratings.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

So I actually do get it. I have repeatedly stated a men's SMV/attractiveness is not based solely on looks.

I disagree. Women get horny by how you look.

 

[Manure Spherian]

I disagree. Women get horny by how you look.

Yes, of course looks do a lot.

I meant looks are not the only things that attract women. Plenty of ordinary looking men have women.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Yes, of course looks do a lot.

I meant looks are not the only things that attract women. Plenty of ordinary looking men have women.

I agree with you.

I’m better looking than all of my friends. Yet all of them, except for those with mental health issues, are married or in LTRs.

Really. Just be normal and average.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

In spite of the blackpill gospel, there are plenty of sub-mediocre looking men out there having LTRs.

Many women play the game safe and rather be with the easy controlable beta provider they can boss around then woman-up and work on keeping Chad around.

So unless one is objectively ugly, there is no reason he cant find pvssy if he has anything of value to women.


Whats even more inflated then mens 1-10 rating is womens rating.
Just read here how everyone is fvcking women that are 9s and everything below 8 is scraping the bottom of the barrel. Its ridiculous.

 

[SW15]

there are plenty of sub-mediocre looking men out there having LTRs.

This happens, though I think it is more common with mediocre men than sub-mediocre men.

The most common way for mediocre and sub-mediocre men to get an LTR is through their social circle.

The next way that these pairings happen is on dating apps. Mediocre men will tend to dumpster dive on swipe apps until they can get something. Sub-mediocre men might be too subpar in looks to do this but might end up with a sub-mediocre female on a dating app. Some might call this a looksmatch.

Neither mediocre men nor sub-mediocre men tend to do well with approaching strangers in a real life setting. Sub-5s often get harsh rejections doing this (there are YouTube and TikTok videos showing this). Mediocre men will get fewer harsh rejections but are not likely to have a lot to show for approaching in real life settings. Additionally, Western culture is moving away from real life approaching.

Many women play the game safe and rather be with the easy controlable beta provider they can boss around then woman-up and work on keeping Chad around.

This is less common behavior for younger women in bigger cities but it still can happen.

There are women 30+ who will settle for an easy, controllable beta provider after failing to get commitment from a hot alpha/sigma type.

Many 30s/early 40s women will still seek top tier guys on swipe apps and from their social media DMs.

 

[Manure Spherian]

Some might call this a looksmatch.

Looks and class matching are good.

 

[Manure Spherian]

Additionally, Western culture is moving away from real life approaching.

I’m a late Gen Xer. I don’t know one couple that formed from the man approaching a stranger woman. Literally none! That’s why the discourse in mainstream and social media about “men not approaching women” is asinine.

 

[SW15]

I’m a late Gen Xer. I don’t know one couple that formed from the man approaching a stranger woman. Literally none! That’s why the discourse in mainstream and social media about “men not approaching women” is asinine.

Among the people you know, how did those couples form? How recently did those couples form?

 

[Manure Spherian]

Among the people you know, how did those couples form? How recently did those couples form?

Work
School
Dating websites (before apps)
Dating apps
Neighborhood
Through friends/introductions (party, hanging out)
Mutual interest/hobby (eg, close friend met his wife at a benefit)

 

[SW15]

I’m a late Gen Xer. I don’t know one couple that formed from the man approaching a stranger woman. Literally none!

Among the people you know, how did those couples form? How recently did those couples form?

Work
School
Dating websites (before apps)
Dating apps
Neighborhood
Through friends/introductions (party, hanging out)
Mutual interest/hobby (eg, close friend met his wife at a benefit)

Interesting list there. It's a good basis for a conversation.

I know 2 couples that formed through a nightlife venue stranger approach. Of the people I know, this is a smaller part of how couples formed.

I don't think it's valuable to make judgments off of how the people I know met their current partner. These are all relationships that formed between 2010-2014. What happened in 2010-2014 isn't as relevant in 2025.

I have multiple friends who formed relationships off of dating websites right before dating websites gave way to dating apps.

From your list, school could be a stranger approach or something social circle related.

I didn't hear of one case of a random, outdoor on campus approach leading to multiple dates or a relationship. There might have been an approach or two in my university's student union that lead to something longer term, but I wasn't aware of it or simply don't recall it now.

Approaching a woman after an academic class counts as a stranger approach. I know some relationships formed that way when I was in college but I don't think any of those lasted more than a few years.

Hobby/interest stuff can work but it's often a mixed bag.

That’s why the discourse in mainstream and social media about “men not approaching women” is asinine.

I see your point on that. Even when in-person approaching was more common and there was more of an approaching culture, approaching strangers was inefficient (even when effective) at producing couples.

Majority of in-person approaches fail. Few lead to dates. Of the ones that actually lead to dates, a good portion of those are "one date, no sex, no second date" type interactions. "One date, no sex, no second date" is the most common swipe app outcome from swipe app arranged dates.

 

[characternote]

I disagree. Women get horny by how you look.

pretty much all of my lays were when she was attracted to me/how I looked, and thus made it super easy for me on the approach. (e.g talked back, asked ME stuff, helped carry the convo, receptive to flirting etc etc. Exact opposite of what happens on most cold approaches on hot girls)

In some cases they even approached me (due to physical attraction)

(i'm not a good looking dude, but I believe that even guys who aren't a classic chad will be a 'chad' in some girls eyes. E.G not all hot girls have 'conventional' taste. Some might even think prime Brad Pitt isn't good looking lol)
I feel like that was cemented in my brain back when I used to work with a lot of girls in an office and they'd spend all day scrolling insta and DM'ing hot guys, and the prettiest girl of them all would always pick guys who the other girls thought was ugly

Approaching a girl who isn't at all attracted to how you look (she is turned off by old/bald/short etc etc), and you are gonna have a VERY hard time even reaching the hook point lol.

And yeah, having a very very handsome guy as my old wingman showed me just how powerful being handsome is! It was something else how girls would hit on him and react around him etc. Very humbling for me as at the time I was full on 'PUA' and trying to compete with this dude with 'game' lol (like bringing a knife too a gun fight!) - 'compete' isn't really the right thing (in fact he'd often throw girls on me!), but you get what I mean

 

[Plinco]

There are factors of attractiveness that are outside of one's control (age and genetics), and there factors that are in one's control (everything else).

1.) It makes no sense to worry about what's not in your control.
2.) To uphold factors outside of your control over those in your control provides the grounds to rationalize laziness and entitlement.

 

[Gamisch]

I disagree. Women get horny by how you look.

Maybe that's the point of the thread: women dp get horny from looks, but simultaneously or even more importantly is that horniness isn't the most important aspect for women ( unlike men).

A woman can and WILL stay with a man who she isn't necessarily attracted to by default ( assuming attraction means being in a constant strategy of physical arousal).

Status, finances, upbringing/ social pressure ect ect ect can do a lot to keep a woman with a man.

 

[Gamisch]

In spite of the blackpill gospel, there are plenty of sub-mediocre looking men out there having LTRs.

Many women play the game safe and rather be with the easy controlable beta provider they can boss around then woman-up and work on keeping Chad around.

So unless one is objectively ugly, there is no reason he cant find pvssy if he has anything of value to women.


Whats even more inflated then mens 1-10 rating is womens rating.
Just read here how everyone is fvcking women that are 9s and everything below 8 is scraping the bottom of the barrel. Its ridiculous.

Watch with happend when a woman knows you have the white picked fence lifestyle with the ability to travel around the world no stress.

Chad will get cheated on by a man who is "objectively " less attractive than him.

Novelty wears out. Even quicker when you live in your mom's basement being jobless sleeping on an air mattress.

New smelling car and the king size bed with fresh sheets are also very very appealing...

 

[zekko]

There is no way most men will ever get to an 8.

I agree with that, you have to be genetically gifted for good looks to be an 8. For most guys anyway. I've read lots of stuff here where guys say something like hey, you lift some weights, take a shower and get a haircut, and poof you're an 8. My BS detector always goes off at that.

But the good news is different women seem to like a wide variety of different looking guys. One woman might find you hideous, but you might be another's dream come true. Of course you want to have good hygiene and look healthy and stylish, but that makes me think it's more about the emotional connection than the way a guy looks. Beautiful women tend to be universally beautiful ("I'm every guy's type"), but men tend to appeal to smaller circles of women. Unless you're a Chad, of course, but even then I'd say a truly beautiful woman would be more universally appealing.