Why are some guys never single?

[oc16]

Don't we all know a male friend, friend of a friend or acquaintance that always seems to go from relationship to relationship, they are never single long?

What gives?

Being with somebody, even if you aren't that into them is better than being alone?

Embarrassed being single?

Closet Homosexual?

I have been single most my life and find it challenging to meet attractive women who I have things in common with who aren't already taken. It's okay, since I would rather remain single until I meet that woman who makes my heart race.

The last time I met a woman that I liked and actually got somewhere with was 18 months ago.

 

[evan12]

Being in relationship is first step to settle ( in theory ) , many men dont like to spend their time and life chasing women , so they prefer to be in relationship. Now many will jump arguing being in relationship is not the end of game or it could make your life worst, I agree with that, but only if you have past bad experience can take such warnings seriously

 

[oc16]

The way I see it, unless a woman gives you butterflies when you are around her (atleast in the beginning) why not be single?

 

[evan12]

The way I see it, unless a woman gives you butterflies when you are around her (atleast in the beginning) why not be single?

I had your opinion when I was 22, when relationship for me was all about love/sex , but when you get older, you know at least for me , life is not perfect, your youth window has limit, are you not living forever, you dont want to have 1 year old son when you are 50 year because you waited for that special woman.
The man want offspring too , and you have to balance between waiting to get the best genetics and passing your genetics to your next generation. what is the point of getting sexy woman or woman that make you butterflies when she is too old to have kids ?

 

[Georgepithyou]

Who do equate men dating women constantly to closet homosexuality?

What mental gymnastics did you employ to come up with something so absurd?

 

[oc16]

Who do equate men dating women constantly to closet homosexuality?

What mental gymnastics did you employ to come up with something so absurd?

It's not absurd if the guy is effiminate.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

Don't we all know a male friend, friend of a friend or acquaintance that always seems to go from relationship to relationship, they are never single long?

What gives?

Being with somebody, even if you aren't that into them is better than being alone?

Embarrassed being single?

Closet Homosexual?

I have been single most my life and find it challenging to meet attractive women who I have things in common with who aren't already taken. It's okay, since I would rather remain single until I meet that woman who makes my heart race.

The last time I met a woman that I liked and actually got somewhere with was 18 months ago.

What difference does it make? He may be meeting many compatible women, he may have lower standards, or he may have toxic codependent tendencies. There's probably no one answer.

You have your method, I have mine, and he has his.
Some men are virgins until they're 40, then marry and stay together for 20+ years and have 3+ kids. Other men sleep around and never settle. Other men go from relationship to relationship and never have kids, others do the same and have kids with every woman. Some men die virgins, some die with multi thousand lay counts.

The important thing is to figure what you want and go for it.

And you shouldn't compare yourself with others, only compare yourself to your past self.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Don't we all know a male friend, friend of a friend or acquaintance that always seems to go from relationship to relationship, they are never single long?

What gives?

Being with somebody, even if you aren't that into them is better than being alone?

Embarrassed being single?

Closet Homosexual?

I have been single most my life and find it challenging to meet attractive women who I have things in common with who aren't already taken. It's okay, since I would rather remain single until I meet that woman who makes my heart race.

The last time I met a woman that I liked and actually got somewhere with was 18 months ago.

I thought I was the only one who thought dudes who always were in a relationship with different women were closet homosexuals. My theory are most married men are bisexual. The amount of women married catching their husband's cheating with another man is astounding, and is collobroated by what some of my gay and lesbian Co workers tell me

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Who do equate men dating women constantly to closet homosexuality?

What mental gymnastics did you employ to come up with something so absurd?

You'll be surprised

 

[Medina]

The last time I met a woman that I liked and actually got somewhere with was 18 months ago.

Sounds closet homosexual

 

[oc16]

Sounds closet homosexual

"Ah, you're hilarious "

 

[corrector]

I thought I was the only one who thought dudes who always were in a relationship with different women were closet homosexuals. My theory are most married men are bisexual. The amount of women married catching their husband's cheating with another man is astounding, and is collobroated by what some of my gay and lesbian Co workers tell me

That's interesting. Based on Hollywood movies I've seen including Carol, 2015 and Battle of the Sexes, 2017, and Disobedience, 2017, all of the depicted women were bi-sexual lesbians breaking their husband's heart. Granted, I have a bias against any movies depicting what you are talking about, if they existed, as they are not something I"d be interested in seeing. You have your mind-set based on co-workers, I have mine based on these movies that are released in the last half of the past decade.

 

[corrector]

Don't we all know a male friend, friend of a friend or acquaintance that always seems to go from relationship to relationship, they are never single long?

What gives?

Being with somebody, even if you aren't that into them is better than being alone?

Embarrassed being single?

Closet Homosexual?

I have been single most my life and find it challenging to meet attractive women who I have things in common with who aren't already taken. It's okay, since I would rather remain single until I meet that woman who makes my heart race.

The last time I met a woman that I liked and actually got somewhere with was 18 months ago.

Just for the record, I don't know any male friend or family members, either male or female, that go on from relationship to relationship. They are either all happily (and unhappily/separated) married, or are single but just social.

If I had the minset to settle with someone, anyone at any cost, then it's likely I would have moved-out of here and lived in with a ex-gf who has been trailing me. However, I have chosen to live with my aging folks and take care of them and prefer to remain single unless God sends the right woman that my mom would be proud for me to be with.

 

[corrector]

Being in relationship is first step to settle ( in theory ) , many men dont like to spend their time and life chasing women , so they prefer to be in relationship.

I don't feel this is true. If you are with a woman you aren't into then you start feeling trapped and noticing other women around. You have social proof or validation being with "someone" so now it's easier to flirt with and talk to other women, and you have a taken vibe making it easier for other women to flirt with you. You then might start getting turned-on to other woman with this new found status.

Being single and zoned-out, on the other hand, means you just don't care.

Now many will jump arguing being in relationship is not the end of game or it could make your life worst, I agree with that, but only if you have past bad experience can take such warnings seriously

I guess I have bad experiences on the back-end of things. That could be it too.

 

[oc16]

I don't feel this is true. If you are with a woman you aren't into then you start feeling trapped and noticing other women around. You have social proof or validation being with "someone" so now it's easier to flirt with and talk to other women, and you have a taken vibe making it easier for other women to flirt with you. You then might start getting turned-on to other woman with this new found status.

True, I know a guy who lives with his girlfriend. Everytime we are out, he tries to talk to other women and sometimes seems jealous when we are getting positive attention from women. I'm like "Why are you even with this chick if you are trying to cheat on her all the time"?

Being single and zoned-out, on the other hand, means you just don't care.



I guess I have bad experiences on the back-end of things. That could be it too.

 

[skinnyguy]

He could be having low standards and is willing to date anything that has legs. Or maybe he’s a true DJ and women flock to him.

The question is, if he likes relationships so much, why is he jumping from one to another? Why can he not stay with one woman?

 

[Mike32ct]

Some guys will cycle through a social circle quietly. Others do a "90210" of sorts and publicly "date" one at a time lol.

I can't say I fully understand the inner workings of people that just fall into relationships effortlessly. It's actually a good question.

 

[Roober]

When you don't love yourself, the thought of only having one person to rely on for emotional, physical, and psychological needs is terrifying.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Let's face it: Relationships; LTRs, marriage, whatever, DO detract from your other pursuits in life.

The one thing everybody on this planet has that's the same is 24 hours in a day.

That said, what differs is how you choose to use your 24 hours.

Relationships take time, usually a lot of it, if you want to nurture and grow it into something long term. I've been there, had many LTRs, and know exactly what it takes especially with a hot, high-quality woman. If that's your goal, fine. BUT, it WILL come at the expense of you pursuing your hobbies, career, friends, relative time, and solo time (huge...). The pieces of (time) pie just get cut thinner for everything else in your life. That’s a fact.

Many guys are willing to sacrifice all this just to have a girlfriend or wife. Once again, that's fine.

Over the years, it has been my observation that guys like this are usually quite insecure and effeminate. I hear things like "I'd be nothing without her, she's my best friend, I tell her everything, she's helped me so much" and on and on. I choose to focus on ME and MY GOALS--FIRST, and then invest a little time in women. I used to be the other way around but found, and this only come with experience, it's not worth it - for me anyway. I like woman for sex, and do bang a lot of them, but they know I'm STR material only. I'm just happier pursuing my goals and dreams at my own pace. Solo is fine for me.

So to answer OP's question about the guys who "always" have a girlfriend or make relationships their number one quest in life, it's a combination of:

1- Fear of being alone
2- Result of not having clear life goals, a passion, or objectives to pursue
3- Easily influenced from outside pressure, stigmas, old social norms, or comments
4- Nice guy, overly accommodating and giving types
5- Beta mentality that is wired in their DNA; worker bees, yes-men, “I need to check with the boss (wife)” types, etc.

Good luck.

~Dash~

 

[sangheilios]

It could be a something like needing to have a relationship all the time and these men desperately seek this.

Based on my observations, men that are always in a relationship or dating someone are often times simply just in the right set of circumstances where opportunities to meet women that they actually like, who also like them in return, are abundant. I've met some guys who just by chance often seem to just be at the right place at the right time with the right woman. Ever heard stories like how they were in line at the grocery store and somehow they met or insert any other type of random encounter. Other guys just seem to be in environments where meeting women is easy; taking college courses, coworkers, social circle, etc.

If you are a man, regardless of how attractive you are, who does not have random luck with this and is not in a set of circumstances where meeting women regularly is common of course you are going to be single. You take a guy who is focused on working out, making money and being productive overall of course he isn't going to be meeting women that he'd be interested in. In order for him to meet women he'd have to detract some of his time and energy away from his pursuits and direct it towards things like going to bars and clubs, going to dating events, socials, etc. You think a guy who is working towards his goals is really going to have all that much time and energy to devote to that, especially when chances are he is going to net nothing time after time?

I am of the belief that some men are by their nature are more family, relationship/marriage oriented but other men are more focused on their own self interests, whether they be productive and positive things (career, money, etc.) or negative and destructive things (drugs, partying, etc).