"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Who is in the wrong here?

XxprodigyxX

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i was talking to this girl who just recently broke up with her bf. she use to have a crush on me so i thought everything would be cool. we'd go out a couple times and talk on the phone occasionally. well i found out she got back with her ex and i cut off all my connections with her and never called her. she called me the other day acting like everything was cool asking how my day was going and s**t. she called basically sayin we should still be friends cause she enjoyed my company...WTF was she thinking?!?...i told her i couldnt be her friend because things just dont work that way. i dont wanna be the fool she runs to about her problems...i dont want her to cry to me while shes f*****g him. she was pretty pissed saying i was immature for acting this way. i told her to have a good life and hung up...who is in the wrong here?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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flexion_

Master Don Juan
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I'm not sure which right wrong question you are asking. You did the right thing for essentially nexting her. I think you were wrong in the way you nexted her. You don't have to be angry or tell her off.

You most likely were always a friend in her mind but you thought otherwise in your mind when she temporarily broke up with her BF.
 

XxprodigyxX

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my fault...am i wrong for not being friends with her is what im asking...i know for a fact she has/had a thing for me cause i met her thru a friend who said she had a thing for me...haha...
 

Kitsune

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You did the right thing, sounds like she was looking to you to be an emotional tampon to cry on when things don't work out with her bf. Girls will always nearly pull the "Oh you're so immature" line when something doesn't go their way, but you acted right (although you really shouldn't tell her off) and nexted her, saving you a whole bucketload of trouble further down the line.
 

JonJack

Master Don Juan
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Originally posted by XxprodigyxX
my fault...am i wrong for not being friends with her is what im asking...i know for a fact she has/had a thing for me cause i met her thru a friend who said she had a thing for me...haha...
You don't have to be friends with her if you don't think she'll be a good friend. However, I don't think you'll make a good friend to her anyway.

Honestly speaking, it is extremely immature behaviour. A lot of the others would probably think otherwise, but if you would to actually look deeper into the reasons for your behaviour, you will come to the conclusion that you were being immature. Or maybe immature isn't the right word. A better word would be sensitive, emotional or demanding.

But then again, if you really have no use whatsoever for female friends, then there really is nothing to discuss here.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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zerocelcius

Master Don Juan
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you started being friends with her thinking she was going to get with you, and when she didn't you threw a fit.

Right or wrong I don't know.
 

XxprodigyxX

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i was never her friend..we were acquaintances. but yeah...its all good. im not really trippin off it. thanks fellas.
 

spider_007

Master Don Juan
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you put it to her in a very bad way....

You should have said; "I do want to keep in touch, hawever, it would be way to wierd being around you and hearing; the good, bad and the ugly about you and yourr b/f. While at the same time having a crush on you. You understand what I mean".

You decide haw much you talk to her. What ever you feel comforatable with......If you don't feel like answering her phonecalls, DON'T.
 

jprjrjr

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You did the right thing. What's immature about not wanting to be somebody's emotional tampon?

If she knew you liked her, and she started seeing her ex without telling you, that's a bit fvcked up.

Don't listen to these AFC's telling you that you were immature. You put your foot down, and let her know where you stand. She has her rules, you have yours.

If she doesn't like it, tell her to hike it.
 

Life-Trainee

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Repeat after me. Say one thing, do another! You didn't have to burn her off like this. This was bad planning on your side. You should've agreed to being her friend but intentionally avoid being her emo tampon. When you show you intentions you introduce variables that may turn against you.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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