"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Where I have been

Bible_Belt

Bible_Belt

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As I speak there are like 5 pairs of shoes all over the floor of my house

I remembered that you are a neat freak.

My sosuave gripes are the 'girls have cooties' excessive std fears and the misogynist way of calling every woman who has been with a couple dozen guys The Wh0re of Babylon.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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backbreaker

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a neat freak I am. I'm working on her. She's not THAT bad honestly but I walked and was on the phone and tripped over a high heel the other day, in my own damn living room. that's not very fun.

it makes for a good game of WAR however... if we ever get into it there is already ammunition on the ground to start slinging at each other.

on your gripe, a very good friend I grew up with I just found out he has HIV, so I've been on my soap box for the last c ouple of months about getting tested and making sure about cooties and all that good stuff.

i'd be funny if cooties was an actual STD
 
Bible_Belt

Bible_Belt

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Cooties are probably crabs. They are the only funny std, probably because they are so easy to get rid of.

My condolences on your hiv+ friend.
 
T

thefonz

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lookyoung said:
No problem that is what seperates men from the boys. I am glad you finally see that honesty is a good thing. Maybe your time away has given you the confidence and selfesteem to be real this time.
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"Haters hate, then let 'em hate and watch the money pile up."

Welcome Back sexy.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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backbreaker

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almost forgot. I'm pretty sure I ran into someone here on the forum about 2 m onths ago out at a resturant. Becuse only someone that came to this site and who was a newb could get ****y and funny so god damn wrong.

you know..when it's ovbious you are scripting? The guy ltierarly... while I"m taking my GF out on a date.. not minding anyone else's business, decides he is going to make a joke about my hat I had on (a fedeora), when I say out of nowhere.. literarly... all I here is "godfather hat" and he's looking and pointing at me.

i could not even get mad because I've been there at one point. whoever you are man.. just keep tryin. eventually it will come.
 
S

STR8UP

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Bible_Belt said:
My sosuave gripes are the 'girls have cooties' excessive std fears and the misogynist way of calling every woman who has been with a couple dozen guys The Wh0re of Babylon.
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A-MEN brother.

Some people think they have escaped the matrix, when in reality all they have done is simply realize that it exists.
 
T

ThunderMaverick

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backbreaker said:
you know..when it's ovbious you are scripting? The guy ltierarly... while I"m taking my GF out on a date.. not minding anyone else's business, decides he is going to make a joke about my hat I had on (a fedeora), when I say out of nowhere.. literarly... all I here is "godfather hat" and he's looking and pointing at me.

i could not even get mad because I've been there at one point. whoever you are man.. just keep tryin. eventually it will come.
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You were the black guy, right?

I just need a little more practice. Thanks for the support!

Oh, welcome back!:cheer:
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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