when to send a confirmation msg

[pete101]

yeah

 

[tick37]

Well, hopefully you've got definite plans. If so, don't confirm with her tomorrow unless you already told her you would. If she doesn't show up, don't call her. Don't ask if she's coming. Just wait 15 minutes. If she shows up 30 minutes later, it's her loss. She'll have to make a valiant effort to make it up to you. Now, if she shows up, be yourself and don't go overboard trying to make her like you. Just be you and know that you are giving her a great opportunity to be with a great guy.

 

[MacAvoy]

You're now going beyond AFC and into the world of stalker. Stop calling. You should have given her space and time to decide on her own. Now you're pushing her and being selfish. You didn't even give her a chance. You started chasing, and she started to run. They always run when you chase.

X 10

You've done everything wrong and you proved it to yourself by blocking your ID. Totally forget about this one and go find a new facebook hookup LMFAO

 

[pete101]

[quote=

 

[trverb]

dont go by what she says but by what she DOES....if she wants to really meet up she'll do it, not constantly find excuses..most women will never tell you directly if there not interested (unless you dont take the hints).

Im not trying to put your situation down here but be PREPARED for a fall as much as a success.


maybe the reason its still on is because her interest level is prob 10% and is giving you a shot.

so your date turn up the ****y&funny and keep your head cool dont think "is this going well" think "is this girl even that interesting"

women are crazy things they think in riddles but you shouldnt follow them

 

[pete101]

Well, hopefully you've got definite plans. If so, don't confirm with her tomorrow unless you already told her you would. If she doesn't show up, don't call her. Don't ask if she's coming. Just wait 15 minutes. If she shows up 30 minutes later, it's her loss. She'll have to make a valiant effort to make it up to you. Now, if she shows up, be yourself and don't go overboard trying to make her like you. Just be you and know that you are giving her a great opportunity to be with a great guy.

crap i think i mighta said i'd call her before i leave.. even tho i said make it at 8 like 3-4 times.

i guess i'll have to send a msg then cos otherwise she wont think it's on if i said i'd call her beforehand.

 

[MacAvoy]

unless of course she cancels on me last min.. how come this girl isn't following by the rules and things you guys have been saying in regards to flaking etc?

Were you not suppose to meet up with her today? Did you? To me that is flaking. Now your making excuses for her. If by the grace of god she does show up tomorrow and you hit it off, in a month's time, your going to be telling how she is the one, then in 8 months, your going to be asking us how to get her back.

 

[DonGorgon]

guys i dont understand what the hell is going on..

i call her now with no caller id so she doesn't know who it is (i dont think shes smart enough to realise these things yet..)

i completely make no mention of todays indiscretions and just acted c+f, i made some joke on the phone immediately and had her laughing then she says to me 'i've never met anyone like you before who's so ****y..'

i didn't know how to respond so i said 'well im not ****y and arrogant, im ****y and funny.'

i guess it raises my level a bit that she thinks im self assured.. i just need to prove it. but anyway she's meeting me tomorrow.

unless of course she cancels on me last min.. how come this girl isn't following by the rules and things you guys have been saying in regards to flaking etc?

obviously i'll be embarassed if she ends up flaking.. she sounds like a girl of high interest on the phone.. but she wont take my calls unless she doesn't know it's me.. crazy.

dont gat happy and AFC get DJ and take control.. tell her something came up and you cant make it ... then tell her you well get back to her tomorrow and maybe reschedule ( which you will no not).. call her a week later like nothing happened and tell her how busy you are but you have not forgotten her,...LOL

 

[pete101]

[quote

 

[DonGorgon]

Were you not suppose to meet up with her today? Did you? To me that is flaking. Now your making excuses for her. If by the grace of god she does show up tomorrow and you hit it off, in a month's time, your going to be telling how she is the one, then in 8 months, your going to be asking us how to get her back.

ummmm that was mean...LOL

 

[MacAvoy]

crap i think i mighta said i'd call her before i leave.. even tho i said make it at 8 like 3-4 times.

i guess i'll have to send a msg then cos otherwise she wont think it's on if i said i'd call her beforehand.

Don't send a message, don't call, you'll just give her an opportunity to flake. Just show up and be prepared to do something else instead.

 

[pete101]

[quo

 

[tick37]

crap i think i mighta said i'd call her before i leave.. even tho i said make it at 8 like 3-4 times.

i guess i'll have to send a msg then cos otherwise she wont think it's on if i said i'd call her beforehand.

Well, if you told her you'd call her to confirm, then do it, but don't do that anymore. You should only have to tell her once. If she is into you, she won't forget. Confirmations signify desperation.

 

[MacAvoy]

ummmm that was mean...LOL

I know, its called tough love. He's been here 2 years and should know his stuff by now but he's making rookie mistakes.

 

[MacAvoy]

see i know what you're saying.. i guess it's cos i got oneitis already.. that im not strong enough to cancel on her.. i've never met her before

This is where I bail. My mean predication has already come true.

 

[tick37]

see i know what you're saying.. i guess it's cos i got oneitis already.. that im not strong enough to cancel on her.. i've never met her before this is why im inclined not to cancel on her or do these things till after we've first met.

with a HB like her guys falling over themselves i guess it's a necessity to do the things you say..

assuming things go well tomorrow i should split after 1 hour even if she suggests going somewhere else after?

it'll take her by surprise i guess.. but i probably need to end on a high but seem disinterested at the end.

You're not strong enough to cancel because you don't believe in yourself. She's a flakey hor, and you've given yourself up. Did she do anything for you to reward her with your attention. No, not a damn thing. Since she knows you'll always be there, she'll do as she damn well pleases.

 

[DonGorgon]

see i know what you're saying.. i guess it's cos i got oneitis already.. that im not strong enough to cancel on her.. i've never met her before this is why im inclined not to cancel on her or do these things till after we've first met.

with a HB like her guys falling over themselves i guess it's a necessity to do the things you say..

assuming things go well tomorrow i should split after 1 hour even if she suggests going somewhere else after?

it'll take her by surprise i guess.. but i probably need to end on a high but seem disinterested at the end.

Hell its not easy for me to do either if i really like the girl but w must do it...

 

[pete101]

maybe

 

[tick37]

Whoa, there is a whole lot of countering going on between you two. Just set a date and stick to it on you're end. If she bails, then it's a red flag, and you need to move along to the next. This is my last post on your thread. Good luck!

 

[Mr. Me]

You know what pete? You have tunnel vision. You're so focused on "Why is she meeting me?" when the truth is: she hasn't.

Just because her lips say "I'll meet you"... you're totally overlooking her previous history plus now ALL the new signs that she's going to flake.

* She wont take your calls unless she doesn't know it's you.
* She said you picking her up wasn't a good idea.

And when I read "but anyway she's meeting me tomorrow" my thought was, "How did that come down exactly?" what did she say and how did she say it... because, pete, you probably missed the tell tale signs along the way.

Now you're just hearing what you want to hear. And because you didn't hear the word "NO", you're confused.

"she hasn't really flaked on me..." Are you kidding? All her not calling you back, not committing to anything, her dodging you... you can discount all that, huh?

Anyhow, here you are now set up to be flaked on... again.

It's gotten real difficult to help you out, because you keep ignoring what to do and go about things the way you do, which keeps landing you in the same awkward position.

maybe she really likes me enough to forgo some of these stupid things im doing..

You can't get credit enough to overcome blunders with someone you haven't met yet. They have to have grown to really like you somewhat in real life first in order to turn a blind eye to small mistakes. Rather, at this stage, women take it all in, unknown to you, and observe it all and form their opinion. They don't necessarily tell you what that opinion is, pete.

No, many of them instead smile and nod their heads agreeably and compliment us and pretend it's all okay, and encourage you to keep being a fool, because they're SMART, man. They let you have all the rope you need to hang yourself. Do you understand? This is how they get guys to show them what we're made of.