Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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when someone asks for your number at work

Heretolearn

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Hi,


What is the best way to handle when a boss or work colleague asks for your number at work. *assuming you are not interested.

You could say 'I do not date/hang out with work colleagues but that just gives hope that if you were not work colleagues than it would work'. I foresee this may cause problems later.

As you see the person regularly, you want to create a situation where both parties are comfortable and not feeling weird. Also, a way for the asker to save face to colleagues when the asker is turned down for the number.

Please give advice for these 2 situations:

A)
asker: Woman
askee: Man

OR
B)

asker: Man
askee: Woman

OR
C)

asker: Woman
askee: Woman

* just kidding, you wish :)
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Phyzzle

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'that just gives hope that if you were not work colleagues than it would work'. I foresee this may cause problems later.
It won't cause anything later. Why would it? You won't be working there anymore.

How many times has a woman asked for your number? How many times at work?

Threads are much more interesting if you only ask about problems that you have personally encountered.
 

DJDamage

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Tell them you have a problem with your phone and that you will give them your email instead.

If she dosn't get that this was a slight brushoff and email's you anyway, then you should respond to the email stright to the point, that you are flattered but you are already seeing someone. If it was just a casual email asking you to hang out, then respond after a few days saying that you are really busy right now but when you schedule opens up you will give them a shout (which of coarse you won't but eventually they will see that you are too buzy for them and leave you alone).
 

flexion_

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"I don't date people I work with...". If at a later date she doesn't work there and asks you out again then tell her to piss off ... as she no longer works with you. And if this situation ever happens - write a book.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Heretolearn

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I appreciate your responses. Nevertheless, I was hoping for a better solution. I do not like the solutions offered above as it is still leading a person on. t is what this board complains about when the roles are reversed.

In reality, when this has happened to me *girl asks for my number. I generally give my email out as I always need more friends.

In this instance though, a girl is asking me for advice on how to handle a person at her work asking for her number. What do you suggest?
 

Phyzzle

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In this instance though, a girl is asking me for advice on how to handle a person at her work asking for her number.
Geez, so why didn't you just SAY that? You're allowed to ask direct questions here.

What do you suggest?
Well it depends!

If he can take a hint, "I'm too busy" or "I don't date coworkers."

But for clueless social retard chumps, anything other than "NO!" is leading him on. She must say, "NO!" or "get the fck away from me."

Make sense? This guy will either take the hint or not. Not rocket science.
 

Latinoman

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yendor28 said:
In this instance though, a girl is asking me for advice on how to handle a person at her work asking for her number. What do you suggest?

If you want CLEAR advice...then be more CLEAR.

Who (boss, peer, subordinate, etc.) is the person asking her for her number? And for what purpose (work or non-work related)?
 

Heretolearn

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information:

askee is waitress, asker is chef. Asker knows askee has boyfriend. Can only assume non work related purpose.
 

Phyzzle

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She has a boyfriend? Then say "I have a boyfriend."

Not rocket science.

If he asks again, "are you deaf? I have a boyfriend. That means no digits to other guys."
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Latinoman

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yendor28 said:
information:

askee is waitress, asker is chef. Asker knows askee has boyfriend. Can only assume non work related purpose.

Well...if she has a boyfriend...then why are you getting involved? It is NOT your business. And for Christ sake, she is a waitress...it is not that hard to make a "career move" in that particular field.

You are acting like a "girlfriend".
 
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