"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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When she doesn't respond back.

Van_The_Man

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Okay so I have this friend of mine who is a girl that I wanted to hang out with last weekend.
Around tuesday I emailed her (via facebook) and told her how we should hang out some time this weekend at this new place I discovered. She responded back saying it would be cool and that she might be able to come except that she was planning on hanging out with this other girlfriend of her's on the weekend as well.
Well of course I joked back saying, "What, do you plan on hanging out with her the entire weekend? ;P" (that was around wed.). Well she never responded back though when I look at her profile page she's clearly been online and has posted some stuff on her wall after that message I sent her.

Now I was a bit upset but didn't let if faze me at all cause I just set up something with someone else. But my question is what should I do here? I'm stuck between not saying anything about it to saying something. Like "Hey for future reference it'd be much appreciated if you could get back to me sooner when I try and make plans."
What do you guys think? More importantly what would you guys do?
She's someone I'd like to just have around as a friend, and she's a nice person, though this was the first time she's ever done anything like that.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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cmr662

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Van_The_Man said:
But my question is what should I do here? I'm stuck between not saying anything about it to saying something. Like "Hey for future reference it'd be much appreciated if you could get back to me sooner when I try and make plans."
Whatever you do, DON'T SAY THIS. I can guarantee you she will think you are a psycho (at least, considering all the details you've given us) and won't talk to you anymore. I'd give it at least a week, message her again something playful and see how she reacts. In my honest opinion she isn't interested or else she would have responded.
 

Van_The_Man

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cmr662 said:
Whatever you do, DON'T SAY THIS. I can guarantee you she will think you are a psycho (at least, considering all the details you've given us) and won't talk to you anymore. I'd give it at least a week, message her again something playful and see how she reacts. In my honest opinion she isn't interested or else she would have responded.
lol alright, thanks for your advice. I dodged a bullet there.
 

J Roc

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Van_The_Man said:
She's someone I'd like to just have around as a friend, and she's a nice person, though this was the first time she's ever done anything like that.
You dont want her as a friend. dont you have plenty of males friends? YOU WANT TO BANG HER!!!
 

kingsam

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J Roc said:
You dont want her as a friend. dont you have plenty of males friends? YOU WANT TO BANG HER!!!
exactly, stop trying to get her to "hang out"...its like your trying to sneak her onto a date with out her realising...

she has prob had the meet up with her Girlfreind arranged for a while, who is more important... as you are new to her life (and your not potential dates - see your last line)

you need to offer her something exciting she dont alreay have as a new male freind - it may be easier to be on group outlings with her at the start to build up your rapport...one-to-one "freind dates" are a little odd in some ways
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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