When she does it too quickly: Red Flag?

[jhonny9546]

I have a good friend who has gone through several significant steps in his life:

2018: He met his girlfriend. (He 23 she 21)
2020: His gf invited him to work in her business, as her father was planning to retire soon, and she would take over the business alone.
2021: His gfbecame pregnant. (She hadn’t informed him that she was taking supplements for pregnancy, but he knew she was on birth control pills since they were having unprotected sex) (RedFlag?)
2022: Their first child was born.
-2024: They are expecting their second son. They had not discussed a specific date for conception, but during one intimate moment, his girlfriend was on top (in the cowgirl position) when he ejaculated, and kinda blocked over him, leading to her pregnancy. (RedFlag?)
Looking ahead, they are planning to get married in 2027.


I wonder if this woman is simply looking for someone to replace her father in the business and provide financial security, but looking for red flags, despite these concerns, I believe she genuinely cares for their home and is a good mother. She is socially active and respected within her social circle. However, there are some red flags other than the two eventts; she can be quite dramatic and has occasional outbursts of anger. Overall, if you weigh the pros against the cons, she appears to be a good person.

In today’s world, it can be challenging to find a woman who is family-oriented, has her own business, is socially active, and takes care of her family. Basically, they're also working togheter in their daily job.

So a woman that actually want to make things too quickly like this, is a bad thing?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

He is 23. She is 21. No way they should be locking themself down that early in life. Almost always a big mistake that ends in a divorce or breakup by 30.

 

[BaronOfHair]

He is 23. She is 21. No way they should be locking themself down that early in life. Almost always a big mistake that ends in a divorce or breakup by 30.

There's no compelling rationale for a MAN* to marry that young, especially a man in the contemporary, Post-Industrial West. Today's 23 year olds are essentially 13, psychologically speaking. I don't even say that as a criticism... When I was as a 23 year old, I was a decade more immature than people who were then in their 30s were, when THEY were 23

Each new decade of youngsters takes longer to mature than all folks who came prior



*What guy in his early 20s today even has a f-cking career to support a wife and kids? Dude in the OP ain't anywhere CLOSE to financial sturdiness, and he now has 2!!!

 

[BaronOfHair]

Really, 'too quickly'. He boinked her without prophylactics. She becomes pregnant 3 years after starting a relationship with him. If he's not making up his mind, looks like he has a girlfriend who does. He is two years older than he is. When he knocks her up he's old enough to stop 'playing the field' and wifing her up. Some guys are dense in that aspect, so it's a good thing their girlfriends keep their eye on the prize.

Yeah, it's understandable for women in their 2nd decades of life to be giving motherhood serious thought: As even many card-carrying Progressives have acknowledged, biology isn't feminist https://www.theguardian.com/comment...e-church-nature-forced-adoptions-ivf-feminism

It makes no sense for modern MEN, who have zero pennies to their name until they're deep into their 30s, to jump into fatherhood that young

 

[jhonny9546]

This is interesting. It seems that this woman might have felt "the wall" before, or that she simply wanted different things in the past. It appears that once women achieve their goals, they may feel too relaxed about their situation and begin to focus on other aspects of life rather than family.

As you've mentioned, I don't believe that one's twenties are the best age to start a family. While it's a good time to make plans and set goals for that future, it's not necessarily the ideal time to bring it to fruition. I would suggest that a suitable age for men is between 35 and 40, and for women, between 28 and 35.