"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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When girls call you ****y

gravityeyelids

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I would like to hear some input from the forum on translating the GirlSpeak when a girl calls you ****y or says "you're too ****y" or "you're too ****y for you're own good". especially when they say it like it's a bad thing.

Now, in general i think a bit of mindless, apathetic ****iness is a good thing. However, i do think that a lot of it should be restrained at that a humble confidence is preferred. Especially when everyone around you KNOWS you're the ****.

Thoughts? I've had THREE different girls today call me this. Two said it like it was a negative thing and one included a winky face about it. Just brush it off and roll with it? Turn it into a joke or a positive? That's what i;m thinking. Just assume it's always an IOI
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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bigneil

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3 girls in one day can't be wrong. Your behavior obviously defines ****y. It generally means being overconfident with a touch of insecurity and without being playful.
 

RangerMIke

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If a woman calls you '****y'... that is NOT good. If a girl calls you 'funny', that's a good thing.

You have to be ****y-funny, if she thinks you are ****y, then you are not being funny enough. If she thinks you are funny, then you have the right balance. You should be ****y enough, but not so much that you come off as a douche@g.

If you are too ****y you come off as insecure and overcompensating.
 

Konada

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Tictac said:
What other people think of you is none of your business
With all due respect, there comes a point in time where everyone must set aside their ego and take a good hard look at themselves.

@OP: The common denominator in all interactions is you, so probably yes you are coming across ****y.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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