"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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When a (former?) plate's friend starts texting..

EverSure75

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Would love your thoughts on this, gentlemen..

There was a woman I was seeing but pulled back after we had sex..I was keeping her as a plate..though I think she figured out I dropped the ball and had pulled back herself Our relationship kinda fizzled to texts a few times a week to check in...Haven't been out together in months..

A few months back a friend of hers who lives overseas (who is hotter and more interesting IMO..we met while she was visiting about a year ago) needed a favour I could've helped with because of the nature of my job. She inboxed me on twitter and we exchanged numbers. I helped her out. That time we met I could definitely pick up some chemistry. More than her friend (plate) and I ever had. From our few conversations and her social media feed..we have more in common than her friend and I.

She visited the country a few weeks ago and me, plate and friend were supposed to meet for drinks..It never happened...the friend had some last minute family thing to do.

A few days ago friend texts me out the blue.."heeey...happy Friday"..or something to that effect..
We've been having an interesting conversation about film to be honest over the last few days..I probably texted her like 3 times a day...neither of us responds right away.

Is there anything behind this?
Is she acting on the chemistry I thought I felt?
HAs the plate "passed me off" to her friend and she's now showing interest?
Am I thinking too deep?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Billtx49

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It may be further proof of the power of preselection, or it might be female competitiveness for a desired prospect. Operate on those two assumptions going forward. If she sees you only as a friend, you will eventually know.
 
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blind_one

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A few days ago friend texts me out the blue.."heeey...happy Friday"..or something to that effect..
We've been having an interesting conversation about film to be honest over the last few days..I probably texted her like 3 times a day...neither of us responds right away.
That kind of texting kills mystery and attraction imho.
If she hits you up like that set up a date and go from there.
 

Lozboss

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OP- Why you being her girlfriend and chatting film over text?

Crazy idea: Why not do that ON A DATE?

Grow a pair, ask her out. Worst thing is she's not interested, no loss.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Bingo-Player

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id say she probably wants a piece of the pie

women are calculating and this sounds pretty calculated to me

women dont generally "do things out of the blue" unless they have an agenda
 

EverSure75

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I hear you guys. I actually would ask her out but she lives overseas. So in my head I'm thinking nothing will come out of this any way
 

Tictac

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Would love your thoughts on this, gentlemen..

There was a woman I was seeing but pulled back after we had sex..I was keeping her as a plate..though I think she figured out I dropped the ball and had pulled back herself Our relationship kinda fizzled to texts a few times a week to check in...Haven't been out together in months..

A few months back a friend of hers who lives overseas (who is hotter and more interesting IMO..we met while she was visiting about a year ago) needed a favour I could've helped with because of the nature of my job. She inboxed me on twitter and we exchanged numbers. I helped her out. That time we met I could definitely pick up some chemistry. More than her friend (plate) and I ever had. From our few conversations and her social media feed..we have more in common than her friend and I.

She visited the country a few weeks ago and me, plate and friend were supposed to meet for drinks..It never happened...the friend had some last minute family thing to do.

A few days ago friend texts me out the blue.."heeey...happy Friday"..or something to that effect..
We've been having an interesting conversation about film to be honest over the last few days..I probably texted her like 3 times a day...neither of us responds right away.

Is there anything behind this?
Is she acting on the chemistry I thought I felt?
HAs the plate "passed me off" to her friend and she's now showing interest?
Am I thinking too deep?
You are over-thinking. It's no more complicated than that she is reaching out to you and hoping that you will ask her out.
 

EverSure75

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You are over-thinking. It's no more complicated than that she is reaching out to you and hoping that you will ask her out.
Ask her out when she lives a 4 hour plane ride away?
I remember when we met last year I asked her if she'll ever return her to live. She said no.
That's why I think there mightn't be anything to it.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Yewki

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You know you're in trouble when your hamster is spinning for a girl who is overseas in another country.

Get to the point and ask when she is coming back to visit. Either way, stop focusing on this girl it's basically a black hole. You're throwing your time away. Pursue girls in your actual country.
 
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