"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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What's the best thing to text message a girl you just met?

K

King Of Nowhere

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Hi, i met this girl yesterday on the school bus. I chatted her up and got her number, and I want to hang out with her sometime this weekend( Or, is this too soon?). I wont see her tomorrow( No school on fridays) , so i cant ask her in person. Plus im not a big fan of phone calls. What should I text to her or what would you text to any girl you just met( Please dont say Hi, this is blah blah blah and it was nice meeting you? that would should kinda lame for a high school-)
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Vice

Vice

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That's not too soon at all. Strike while the iron's hot.

Call her. That way you don't have to waste precious mental resources thinking of what to text, and you also have her invest more of her attention towards you. When she's talking on the phone, she can concentrate only on you, where if you texted, you would be only a minor synapse in her brain and then somethine else in the distraction-laden world of a teenage girl would capture her attention.

Here's the steps:

1. Figure out what you're planning on doing this weekend. Make sure that you're going to do it WITH or WITHOUT her. Example: I'm going salsa dancing on Friday, you're welcome to come along (I actually am, and I invited a girl earlier this week to do so).

2. CALL her. This is VITAL, for the above reason. Talk about something interesting that happened a few days ago, like how you saw this dog chasing a kid on a bike or something (if you can't do that, you might want to look into creating a more interesting life). Remember that what's mundane to you might be interesting and exciting to her. I always have girls ask me about what I do, a boring topic to me is interesting to her.

3. INVITE her out, making sure that she understands that you're going with or without her. This also takes care of any awkward "What do you want to do?" questions that always come up at your age group. If she says no or is a little wishy-washy, don't get emotional or butthurt. She may already have plans. It gives you an opportunity and topic to talk about next time you see/call her.

4. Go out and have fun!

Lastly, welcome to the forum, if you already got a girl's number on the bus at your age, you're already ahead of most guys.
 
K

King Of Nowhere

Don Juan
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Vice said:
That's not too soon at all. Strike while the iron's hot.

Call her. That way you don't have to waste precious mental resources thinking of what to text, and you also have her invest more of her attention towards you. When she's talking on the phone, she can concentrate only on you, where if you texted, you would be only a minor synapse in her brain and then somethine else in the distraction-laden world of a teenage girl would capture her attention.

Here's the steps:

1. Figure out what you're planning on doing this weekend. Make sure that you're going to do it WITH or WITHOUT her. Example: I'm going salsa dancing on Friday, you're welcome to come along (I actually am, and I invited a girl earlier this week to do so).

2. CALL her. This is VITAL, for the above reason. Talk about something interesting that happened a few days ago, like how you saw this dog chasing a kid on a bike or something (if you can't do that, you might want to look into creating a more interesting life). Remember that what's mundane to you might be interesting and exciting to her. I always have girls ask me about what I do, a boring topic to me is interesting to her.

3. INVITE her out, making sure that she understands that you're going with or without her. This also takes care of any awkward "What do you want to do?" questions that always come up at your age group. If she says no or is a little wishy-washy, don't get emotional or butthurt. She may already have plans. It gives you an opportunity and topic to talk about next time you see/call her.

4. Go out and have fun!

Lastly, welcome to the forum, if you already got a girl's number on the bus at your age, you're already ahead of most guys.
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Thanks for the advice! But, I think i need to work on making my life more exciting all I did this week was go to summer school, play football, and took a tour of Conseco Fieldhouse(were the Indiana pacers ). Also, she is a shy girl how do you get her to open up more?
 
Vice

Vice

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If she's shy, you will have to be a man and lead her, and initiate EVERYTHING. That includes conversation, dates, kissing, and sex. Just make her feel comfortable.

Where do you live? I found that girls are alot more interested in guys who are passionate about some kind of watersport. I'm learning to surf and I always talk about surfing. I also fly airplanes, but not many people can relate to that. Plus I'm still learning how to do that too.
 
K

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Vice said:
If she's shy, you will have to be a man and lead her, and initiate EVERYTHING. That includes conversation, dates, kissing, and sex. Just make her feel comfortable.

Where do you live? I found that girls are alot more interested in guys who are passionate about some kind of watersport. I'm learning to surf and I always talk about surfing. I also fly airplanes, but not many people can relate to that. Plus I'm still learning how to do that too.
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I live in Indianapolis there is not alot of watersports to do around here except for swimming.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Vice

Vice

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Well, watersports are MY thing. Find what works for you.
 
K

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I called her ,chatted with her and we are going mini-golfing next weekend.
 
Vice

Vice

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There you go.

If you had texted, you would still be sending cute smiley faces and other bullsh*t to each other. How does it feel to get past that?

Good work.
 
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