What's a polite way to refuse a "hang out" with a girl without makin a counter-offer?

[alpha_ash]

I generally like to stay in the good with people. I don't ruin relationships regardless of what happens. However often I just don't want to see that person or people. So I am requesting a polite way to deny without making a counter-offer and still come off as a great guy. Is that even possible?

 

[Uncharted]

Say what chicks say:

"Oh I'm busy that day but maybe some other time?"

Don't ever reschedule for a specific time.

 

[alpha_ash]

Say what chicks say:

"Oh I'm busy that day but maybe some other time?"

Don't ever reschedule for a specific time.

Excellent, thank you. Should I have a question mark at the end? I feel not have a question mark will allow make for a better response.

 

[Uncharted]

Should I have a question mark at the end? I feel not have a question mark will allow make for a better response.

Actually yes you are right. Leave it out.

 

[alpha_ash]

Thanks for your help. How should I respond if a girl makes a counter-offer on her own loll!

 

[Uncharted]

"Hmm maybe I will let you know!"

Just be vague and don't commit.

 

[Uncharted]

Actually if she's that into you and she's halfway good looking what's the problem with hanging out with her?

 

[VladPatton]

I just did this this morning...just be vague, man. Something to the extents of "yeah, we should hang out some time".
In my case she was pushing for tonight, so I just turned it over to the weather and said "stay dry, it's crappy out there".

Just be polite, busy, out of time, and aloof.

 

[alpha_ash]

Great points, thank you guys. I can always rely on you guys for some very clever advice!

The reason I don't want to see her is because she was unnecessarily disrespectful at one point and only wants to see me again to take advantage of me.

 

[Uncharted]

she was unnecessarily disrespectful

If that's the case I wouldn't even take her calls. A woman took three days to text me back when I asked her to meet up once. I have never responded to another text or call from her since then.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Just tell her that you're dating a girl and dont want to risk to be seen with an other woman now that everything is going great among the two of you.

Especially considering your last post where you said she was disrespectful to you, man you dont own her any nice treatment except if she is some girl from work which you have at least to keep neutral.

 

[VladPatton]

Wait a minute...she was disrespectful??? Pfft, then I wouldn't even bother answering back.

 

[alpha_ash]

I think being vague will be more of a revenge than straight out ignoring her. Plus I don't want to come off as bitter or mean for my own self-image and for personal reasons.

 

[Chamber36]

alpha ash, alpha ash, alpha ash.....

I knew something was up when a guy named Alpha Ash says "I generally like to stay in the good with people" as a first sentence.

Then I read: "The reason I don't want to see her is because she was unnecessarily disrespectful at one point and only wants to see me again to take advantage of me". Here the cat comes out of the hat. Why the hell are you even going to talk to a person that wants to take advantage of you?? Your thought process should be more like 'access to mental energy denied. NEXT'. But instead you've accepted her frame and you are trying to puzzle your way out and save face.... I don't know what's going on precisely but I bet you will save more face if you just don't talk to her at all.

So then I scroll down some more and see: "Plus I don't want to come off as bitter or mean for my own self-image and for personal reasons." I understand the self-image part, but 'personal reasons'? What might these personal reasons be?? You afraid she might attempt character assassination??

I hope you wish to ponder them and perhaps discuss them so that you may be released from the shackles of conformity(to an extent).

 

[alpha_ash]

alpha ash, alpha ash, alpha ash.....

I knew something was up when a guy named Alpha Ash says "I generally like to stay in the good with people" as a first sentence.

Then I read: "The reason I don't want to see her is because she was unnecessarily disrespectful at one point and only wants to see me again to take advantage of me". Here the cat comes out of the hat. Why the hell are you even going to talk to a person that wants to take advantage of you?? Your thought process should be more like 'access to mental energy denied. NEXT'. But instead you've accepted her frame and you are trying to puzzle your way out and save face.... I don't know what's going on precisely but I bet you will save more face if you just don't talk to her at all.

So then I scroll down some more and see: "Plus I don't want to come off as bitter or mean for my own self-image and for personal reasons." I understand the self-image part, but 'personal reasons'? What might these personal reasons be?? You afraid she might attempt character assassination??

I hope you wish to ponder them and perhaps discuss them so that you may be released from the shackles of conformity(to an extent).

I appreciate your comments. I have read it over a few times since you posted and I along the way decided that I wouldn't waste any energy on this *****. It really is a shame how culture (American and otherwise) has evolved into such a ****hole that allows women to act this way and excuses them!

Thanks for the strong words of advice! No more bs with one. Btw since I posted this, she invited me twice.

One of those times it was 9pm so I know she was trying to use me as a last resort after her other ones probably bailed on her. Haha