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What would you respond when a chick asks you this?

andreihaha

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So I asked a girl out, texted just a bit and set up a date yesterday. We were supposed to go after work to some bar at 8pm.
While I was still at work, around 5.30 pm, she texts me this:
HB: At what time should I expect you to come pick me up?
ME: You're pretty young, you look capable of picking yourself up.

We never discussed me picking her up before or where she lived.
If she were to say it like: "Wanna come pick me up before the date", it would have sounded pretty lady-like and of course I would have gladly done that.
But the fact that she simply implied it like that triggered the golddigger alert for me. So I didn't go out with her after this.
In a later text she said something like "I'm not used to this, I've lived around boys all my life and I'm MEGA spoiled and spoiled" (In Romanian we have 2 words for spoiled and she used both..
She was just a pretty 25 yo, maybe like an 7-8 for anyone using the 1-10 scale. How much of a child can you still be at that age?

What do you guys think about this? What would you have done? Do you think I interpreted the situation in a wrong way?

Thanks,
A
 

GrowingPains

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I mean... I usually offer to pick the girl up. And sometimes they say they'll just meet me there.

I think I would've said something to the effect of "Are you asking?" or something to tease her but it doesn't seem like that big of a deal.
 

andreihaha

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I think I would've said something to the effect of "Are you asking?" or something to tease her but it doesn't seem like that big of a deal.
Solid.

After reading the ridiculous stuff she wrote me after, I was happy I got rid of her and didn't waste my time.
But next time I might go for something like you said.
 

Spaz

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So I asked a girl out, texted just a bit and set up a date yesterday. We were supposed to go after work to some bar at 8pm.
While I was still at work, around 5.30 pm, she texts me this:
HB: At what time should I expect you to come pick me up?
ME: You're pretty young, you look capable of picking yourself up.

We never discussed me picking her up before or where she lived.
If she were to say it like: "Wanna come pick me up before the date", it would have sounded pretty lady-like and of course I would have gladly done that.
But the fact that she simply implied it like that triggered the golddigger alert for me. So I didn't go out with her after this.
In a later text she said something like "I'm not used to this, I've lived around boys all my life and I'm MEGA spoiled and spoiled" (In Romanian we have 2 words for spoiled and she used both..
She was just a pretty 25 yo, maybe like an 7-8 for anyone using the 1-10 scale. How much of a child can you still be at that age?

What do you guys think about this? What would you have done? Do you think I interpreted the situation in a wrong way?

Thanks,
A

Alright, since u r begging so despicably and quickly losing all ur pride as a man, I'll reluctantly help you out...

Next time, take the initiative to ask her address and offer to fetch her on ur 1st date together.
 

Infern0

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This is a classic case of overthinking "frame".

The communication style was a bit iffy but at the same time she was confirming a couoke of hours before.

I mean to be honest you probably could have worked that into a situation where you skipped the drinks entirely and got straight down to business when you went to pick her up.
 

andreihaha

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"I will pick you ay at 7:30pm" WHY in God's name would you refuse to pick her up? Later, after she has 6 drinks and you drop her off, it provides the opportunity for you to be invited in.

Yes, I think you did . I think she may have asked to be picked up to be able to invite you in later.
She seemed spoiled and arrogant (which she ended up being) and I didn't feel like handling that.
But you might be right, maybe she wanted to be able to invite me in later, have to say I didn't think about that.

This is a classic case of overthinking "frame".
Agreed.
Mistakes were made. Lessons learned.
Thank you.
 
Last edited:

BJP1991

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So I asked a girl out, texted just a bit and set up a date yesterday. We were supposed to go after work to some bar at 8pm.
While I was still at work, around 5.30 pm, she texts me this:
HB: At what time should I expect you to come pick me up?
ME: You're pretty young, you look capable of picking yourself up.

We never discussed me picking her up before or where she lived.
If she were to say it like: "Wanna come pick me up before the date", it would have sounded pretty lady-like and of course I would have gladly done that.
But the fact that she simply implied it like that triggered the golddigger alert for me. So I didn't go out with her after this.
In a later text she said something like "I'm not used to this, I've lived around boys all my life and I'm MEGA spoiled and spoiled" (In Romanian we have 2 words for spoiled and she used both..
She was just a pretty 25 yo, maybe like an 7-8 for anyone using the 1-10 scale. How much of a child can you still be at that age?

What do you guys think about this? What would you have done? Do you think I interpreted the situation in a wrong way?

Thanks,
A
IMO if a girl wants you to pick her up, she’s comfortable with you and is fine with you knowing where she lives. This is way better than meeting her out - you had a chance to maybe even get invited back into her place.

I think nexting her like you did was a little preemptive and I would have just gone along with it and had the date. Again, I don’t know much for context, but what she said is not merits to drop her or cancel a date
 

Glassguy

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So I asked a girl out, texted just a bit and set up a date yesterday. We were supposed to go after work to some bar at 8pm.
While I was still at work, around 5.30 pm, she texts me this:
HB: At what time should I expect you to come pick me up?
ME: You're pretty young, you look capable of picking yourself up. "I will pick you ay at 7:30pm" WHY in God's name would you refuse to pick her up? Later, after she has 6 drinks and you drop her off, it provides the opportunity for you to be invited in.

We never discussed me picking her up before or where she lived. You missed an opportunity
If she were to say it like: "Wanna come pick me up before the date", it would have sounded pretty lady-like and of course I would have gladly done that.
But the fact that she simply implied it like that triggered the golddigger alert for me. So I didn't go out with her after this.
In a later text she said something like "I'm not used to this, I've lived around boys all my life and I'm MEGA spoiled and spoiled" (In Romanian we have 2 words for spoiled and she used both..
She was just a pretty 25 yo, maybe like an 7-8 for anyone using the 1-10 scale. How much of a child can you still be at that age?

What do you guys think about this? What would you have done? Do you think I interpreted the situation in a wrong way?

Yes, I think you did . I think she may have asked to be picked up to be able to invite you in later.
Common sense only prevails if the person has it.
 

Glassguy

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So I asked a girl out, texted just a bit and set up a date yesterday. We were supposed to go after work to some bar at 8pm.
While I was still at work, around 5.30 pm, she texts me this:
HB: At what time should I expect you to come pick me up?
ME: You're pretty young, you look capable of picking yourself up.

We never discussed me picking her up before or where she lived.
If she were to say it like: "Wanna come pick me up before the date", it would have sounded pretty lady-like and of course I would have gladly done that.
But the fact that she simply implied it like that triggered the golddigger alert for me. So I didn't go out with her after this.
In a later text she said something like "I'm not used to this, I've lived around boys all my life and I'm MEGA spoiled and spoiled" (In Romanian we have 2 words for spoiled and she used both..
She was just a pretty 25 yo, maybe like an 7-8 for anyone using the 1-10 scale. How much of a child can you still be at that age?

What do you guys think about this? What would you have done? Do you think I interpreted the situation in a wrong way?

Thanks,
A
This is a classic example of a man not leading, throwing away perfectly good pvssy and not understanding how women covertly send messages all wrapped up in on post.

Her: At what time should I expect you to pick me up?
Me: Good idea. That way you can relax and drink and not worry about driving back.
Her: Blah blah blah
Me: What is your address
Her: Blah blah blah
Me: Sounds good. I'll swing by and pick you up around 8.

You totally could have taken advantage of this situation. 25 years old, 7-8, wants you to pick her up to go drinking on a one on one date......so she is probably fun, likes to fvck and giving you directions to her pvssy that lead straight to her house. All you had to do was ask for the address and show up, not say anything stupid or act needy/clingy/insecure. Have a few drinks and head back to her house.

But you went into over thinking mode.

Women who make it easy like this are getting rarer by the day. You should have taken advantage.

After my divorce 6 yrs ago I had a chick that was 11 years younger than me (that I already knew in real life) do the same thing. Invited her for drinks, she asked if I was going to pick her up, made it easy. She was just finishing up her masters degree in college and liked to drink and have fun. Although I didnt take her back to her place at the end of the date, we went to my place.

That turned into a very good nearly 3 yr relationship (before I was a rotation guy).

When you get a chance to swing the bat, dont miss. Even worse, dont stand there with the bat on your shoulder and not swing at all.
 

teacha

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meh. Don’t see anything wrong with your reply.

She was never really interested in you from the get go.
 

teacha

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IMO if a girl wants you to pick her up, she’s comfortable with you and is fine with you knowing where she lives. This is way better than meeting her out - you had a chance to maybe even get invited back into her place.

I think nexting her like you did was a little preemptive and I would have just gone along with it and had the date. Again, I don’t know much for context, but what she said is not merits to drop her or cancel a date
Pretty sure this woman was only interested in what OP can do for her. Her entitlement suggests she’s used to men bending over backwards for her.

OP did the correct thing by dropping her. She’s not used to men denying her at all. Now he’s gonna be on her mind if he plays his cards correctly.
 

Alvafe

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Pretty sure this woman was only interested in what OP can do for her. Her entitlement suggests she’s used to men bending over backwards for her.

OP did the correct thing by dropping her. She’s not used to men denying her at all. Now he’s gonna be on her mind if he plays his cards correctly.
yes she looked like the bossy kind, but at the same time he could go pick her up, he would go with her anyway, unless of course its something like a hour far from where he lives, but I don't belive that would be the case, plus knowing where she lives is a plus, you can gauge her life style.

all he needed to do here is ask where, or taking a piss and making jokes and tease her, plus that also make the whole waiting and she never showing a no issue


guys understand this, if you need to make every single thing who happen a pre-organized move like a military tactics, it will never work, making mistakes can also be used as a nice way to see how interested she is on you, a woman into you will find excuses for your mistakes, if not don't matter how "perfect" you act she will pick something to complain, I saw woman complain about him being too perfect, because she saw that as never being good enough to him
 

teacha

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yes she looked like the bossy kind, but at the same time he could go pick her up, he would go with her anyway, unless of course its something like a hour far from where he lives, but I don't belive that would be the case, plus knowing where she lives is a plus, you can gauge her life style.

all he needed to do here is ask where, or taking a piss and making jokes and tease her, plus that also make the whole waiting and she never showing a no issue


guys understand this, if you need to make every single thing who happen a pre-organized move like a military tactics, it will never work, making mistakes can also be used as a nice way to see how interested she is on you, a woman into you will find excuses for your mistakes, if not don't matter how "perfect" you act she will pick something to complain, I saw woman complain about him being too perfect, because she saw that as never being good enough to him
If a woman gets offended because you refused to do something for her, especially for something petty like picking her up on a date, know that she never was really interested in you. It’s not rocket science.

Also, how is refusing to pick up someone for a date a mistake? Is refusing to pay for her meal a mistake as well? Is refusing to open the door for her a mistake as well?
 

Trump

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This is a classic example of a man not leading, throwing away perfectly good pvssy and not understanding how women covertly send messages all wrapped up in on post.

Her: At what time should I expect you to pick me up?
Me: Good idea. That way you can relax and drink and not worry about driving back.
Her: Blah blah blah
Me: What is your address
Her: Blah blah blah
Me: Sounds good. I'll swing by and pick you up around 8.

You totally could have taken advantage of this situation. 25 years old, 7-8, wants you to pick her up to go drinking on a one on one date......so she is probably fun, likes to fvck and giving you directions to her pvssy that lead straight to her house. All you had to do was ask for the address and show up, not say anything stupid or act needy/clingy/insecure. Have a few drinks and head back to her house.

But you went into over thinking mode.

Women who make it easy like this are getting rarer by the day. You should have taken advantage.

After my divorce 6 yrs ago I had a chick that was 11 years younger than me (that I already knew in real life) do the same thing. Invited her for drinks, she asked if I was going to pick her up, made it easy. She was just finishing up her masters degree in college and liked to drink and have fun. Although I didnt take her back to her place at the end of the date, we went to my place.

That turned into a very good nearly 3 yr relationship (before I was a rotation guy).

When you get a chance to swing the bat, dont miss. Even worse, dont stand there with the bat on your shoulder and not swing at all.
Bro I don’t have your qualifications, but if a girl
on a first date said “what time should I EXPECT you?” I may have flipped as well.

Doesn’t this site preach “frame, frame, frame” and “lead lead, lead“ and don’t ever sacrifice or
lower yourself for girls?

I agree with the OP. I probably would have said “Shouldn't you say “are you able to pick me up?” You have to stop the back talk before it starts. Otherwise you are lowering yourself to get sex from a girl.
 

guru1000

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I’d say nothing. Give her training for the next guy. With the next guy she’ll more deferential and less entitled.

In silence, she may even come back with a double text to redress.

Win win either way.

In social situations, when in doubt, Do Nothing.
 

teacha

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I agree with BOTH of you, which is why my inclination would've been to ASK if that's what she NEEDS. Gives her an opportunity to rephrase by responding, "Yes, please!"

That changes everything, especially when most guys probably respond, "I'll there in 5 minutes!"
Given her sense of entitlement, I highly doubt her response would be that enthusiastic. More likely to go on a rant about how it’s a man’s job to do this and that blah blah.
 

logicallefty

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HB: At what time should I expect you to come pick me up?
LL's Reply: Pick you up huh? Boy I don't know. My truck gets kind of picky over the passengers who ride in it. You think you are worthy?

Then I would have picked her up. Then when she got in the truck, I would have made some jokes about the truck telepathicly telling me stuff about her. Busted on her a little bit and pretended it was the truck doing it. This is my method of humor. It may not work for everyone.
 

Alvafe

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If a woman gets offended because you refused to do something for her, especially for something petty like picking her up on a date, know that she never was really interested in you. It’s not rocket science.

Also, how is refusing to pick up someone for a date a mistake? Is refusing to pay for her meal a mistake as well? Is refusing to open the door for her a mistake as well?
I said that had advantages, like I said if you do a mistake and she is into you she will find excuses for you, never said how refusing was a mistake.
 
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