"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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What weight do women put on height and physique?

viking22

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I'm a pretty average looking guy. Girls call me cute because I have a bit of a baby face. But my face is quite round and I lack the chiselled jawline of the guys that are seen as classically handsome and despite being in my mid 20s still look much more like a boy than a man.

However in my favour I am 6 foot 2 and have a good physique: broad shoulders, powerful chest, slim waist, long legs.

However because when I look in the mirror I see myself only as average looking I always tend to assume when I approach pretty girls that they are out of my league and I have to do something special to impress them.

But then I get a fair amount of compliments from girls/ex girlfriends on my height and body. So it makes me think that perhaps there are girls out there who see the overal package and figure I am good looking, so I am setting my sights unduly low when I go for mostly average/cute looking girls.

What are peoples' thoughts on this?

As a guy I admit that if a girl is average looking but has a killer body I'd want to sleep with her even if I didn't necessarily want her as a girlfriend. Does the same sort of thing apply with women?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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European-DJ

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6 feet 2 ... i would give my looks up to be as tall as you are..

I believe - that when you are tall - your looks doesnt matter (obviously you have the physique too) .. So nothing to worry about at all - i think many of them see you as good looking in general .. ofc. there are always exceptions to the rule
 

CuriousGirl

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Weight on looks depends on your personality, the more she likes your personality the less your looks matter. If she doesn't know you then all she's got to go on is looks and then they matter a lot more, so whilst one might judge your picture one way, if she got to know you you can become more good looking and be judged another way, there's a stronger focus on your good physical attributes if she likes you. It's common sense really.

I think men have an easier time with looks, it's a lot easier for a man to strike up attraction from a female through his personality and exchanges with women despite any drawbacks on looks. In the very vaguest of terms be confident, fun and sexual and the woman will be more attracted to you than before you opened your mouth.

Eg there was this guy at my old school, he was one of the hottest guys physically from age 16-19, yet he remained a virgin til he went to Uni. I wasn't attracted to him either. He was just so incredibly shy and well, boring really. And he just copied his mates a lot of the time in little ways.
The last time I saw him however he had really come out of his shell and he's actually lovely, got a hell of a lot more confidence and I imagine is ****ing women these days.
 

Blackmm

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Women have a primal need for provision and protection. At 6'2 you would at least appear to be a good protector so you would win in this area. Short guys can compensate by being wealthy or appearing to have the ability to provide wealth (a good mouthpiece). This is how celebrities like Tom Cruise get by. Looks are a great asset, but most chicks will pick a fat millionaire over a pretty boy bum any day.
 

gaspipe

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CuriousGirl said:
Weight on looks depends on your personality, the more she likes your personality the less your looks matter. If she doesn't know you then all she's got to go on is looks and then they matter a lot more, so whilst one might judge your picture one way, if she got to know you you can become more good looking and be judged another way, there's a stronger focus on your good physical attributes if she likes you. It's common sense really.

I think men have an easier time with looks, it's a lot easier for a man to strike up attraction from a female through his personality and exchanges with women despite any drawbacks on looks. In the very vaguest of terms be confident, fun and sexual and the woman will be more attracted to you than before you opened your mouth.

Eg there was this guy at my old school, he was one of the hottest guys physically from age 16-19, yet he remained a virgin til he went to Uni. I wasn't attracted to him either. He was just so incredibly shy and well, boring really. And he just copied his mates a lot of the time in little ways.
The last time I saw him however he had really come out of his shell and he's actually lovely, got a hell of a lot more confidence and I imagine is ****ing women these days.

I kind of agree with this.

Women have always told me that I have a really pretty face and am very handsome. But, when I used to be shy and introverted I didnt help me get laid at all.

Fast forward today. Im not that shy guy anymore and Ive noticed that women react much more positively now.

Where as before I had a hard time smiling and making eye contact with women, I do that all the time and am much more confident these days and am having much more sex because of it.

Looks are important to a certain extent but in itself will not get you laid.

At 6 2 you should have no problem at all even if you consider yourself average looking. Just act confident, smile and always make eye contact and the women will start to gravitate around you.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Zodiac

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Blackmm said:
Looks are a great asset, but most chicks will pick a fat millionaire over a pretty boy bum any day.
Shows how shallow the female mind is.
 

garruk

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^ seriously?

wouldnt picking the pretty boy bum over a fat millionaire be the shallow choice? lol
 

Stagger Lee

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Women put weight on height, build and especially facial attractiveness. If girls are telling you they think you're cute, then that's indicating you pass the physical attraction test (it probably says something about yor personality too because even if you are good looking but women don't like your personality they probably won't tell you you're physically attractive). But it's not enough to be physically attractive, you have to have confidence/outgoingness/game/personality too. They're not completely two separate issues for women. An unattractive guy's objectively good personality will be subjectively not judge well and an attractive guy's objectively not so good personality will be judge well. Women mishmash looks and personality together somewhat. Personality is almost as much appearance than character, as is physical looks. One female in this thread even said an unattractive guy with a good personality can make up for lacking physical attractiveness. This is not generally true.

Height and physique won't count for much alone. I knew lots of guys over 6'1 and in shape that could never attract a girl. Some of them even had a slightly better than average face too. On the other side of the coin, all the personality and game in the world won't count for anything if you don't have a certain level of physical attractiveness. You have to have both physical attractiveness and personality/game and they are about equal in importance. Women only need some looks and they really don't even need much of that to get guys. Besides it's not so easy changing your personality to some vague target, not as simple as putting on high heels, a flattering dress and make up.
 
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Zodiac

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garruk said:
^ seriously?

wouldnt picking the pretty boy bum over a fat millionaire be the shallow choice? lol
Its shallow either way to base your picking of someone for their looks or wealth instead of personality. Its a Catch 22 argument; either you are shallow for liking someone for their looks or shallow for materialistic wealth. Either one can change in the blink of a bankruptcy or mauling and I'd love to see how many Women would stand by their Man if the situation changed.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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movistar

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Zodiac said:
Its shallow either way to base your picking of someone for their looks or wealth instead of personality. Its a Catch 22 argument; either you are shallow for liking someone for their looks or shallow for materialistic wealth. Either one can change in the blink of a bankruptcy or mauling and I'd love to see how many Women would stand by their Man if the situation changed.
Bankruptcy they are gone... Mauling ? I bet more women would stick around over men sticking around...
 

Blackmm

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Zodiac said:
Its shallow either way to base your picking of someone for their looks or wealth instead of personality. Its a Catch 22 argument; either you are shallow for liking someone for their looks or shallow for materialistic wealth. Either one can change in the blink of a bankruptcy or mauling and I'd love to see how many Women would stand by their Man if the situation changed.
This still falls under the "women want provision and protection" principle. Larry the cable guy is fat, but looks like he could probably kick ass and protect his family and he is rich to boot. Its not really shallow, its just women following 100,000 years of evolutionary instinct.
 

ArcBound

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1) OK you say you are 6' 2" with an awesome physique and that lots of women tell you that you look cute.

2) However you start off your post with "I'm a pretty average looking guy"

Which means you are lying about one of them.

Only in Valhalla is 6' 2" with an awesome physique average :D
 

viking22

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Ha ha I was referring to my face when I said I was average looking. As one of my exes put it I have the face of a boy and the body of a man.

Loved the Thor movie though. Would kill for a face like that guy!
 

Blackmm

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Unless you are deformed, most guys can be classified as having a cute face. Its not the same as some chick saying you are a hottie.

(no homo disclaimer)

Seth Rogan is cute

Brad Pitt is hot.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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