sebastian11
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ive been with my gf for a few months now and she keeps saying that she thinks im using her, what should i tell her to make these thoughts go away?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
what to say when a girl thinks youre just using her for sex?
- Thread starter sebastian11
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Julius_Seizeher
Master Don Juan
1. Agree and amplify.
2. Or do what I do, which is say nothing at all. I just stare straight ahead and do a Benicio del Toro when I hear that stuff.
2. Or do what I do, which is say nothing at all. I just stare straight ahead and do a Benicio del Toro when I hear that stuff.
ASK HER WHY SHE FEELS THAT WAY...........what evidence do you have to support such and outlandish accusation.
quick comebaks:
1) OH YOU WISH
2) oh JUST ADMIT IT YOU LOVE IT
3) your just now figuring this out
4) AND here i THOUGHT IT was your that was never satisfied
5) WHAT ELSE DID YOU WANT TO DO
6) have you looked in the mirror naked............U tell me honetly........if you were a guy, would you be turned on and want to f--k.
7) I put money on the table what more do you want
8) JUST TIL I find a replacement for you
9) OK NOW ITS YOUR TURN...........go ahead use me
10) NOT YOU SPECIFICALLY..........just your parts.
quick comebaks:
1) OH YOU WISH
2) oh JUST ADMIT IT YOU LOVE IT
3) your just now figuring this out
4) AND here i THOUGHT IT was your that was never satisfied
5) WHAT ELSE DID YOU WANT TO DO
6) have you looked in the mirror naked............U tell me honetly........if you were a guy, would you be turned on and want to f--k.
7) I put money on the table what more do you want
8) JUST TIL I find a replacement for you
9) OK NOW ITS YOUR TURN...........go ahead use me
10) NOT YOU SPECIFICALLY..........just your parts.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
War Against Betaism
Master Don Juan
"You're right, now make me a sandwich."
( . )( . )
Banned
This ^^Ease said:
Maybe a "Why whats your point, can you cook and clean?"
edit: war against beat me to it.
Why would you ever agree to that? Seriously?
Like honestly, if you don't want her to break up with you, don't tell her you're using her, "agree and amplify" my ass. If she doesn't take it as 100% a joke she will be all upset and stressy at you.
Tell her you truly like her for who she is, but that she DOES have a sweet ass
From COD's list, you could use 2 if she isn't serious (only if she isn't serious) or 6 but funnier
Like honestly, if you don't want her to break up with you, don't tell her you're using her, "agree and amplify" my ass. If she doesn't take it as 100% a joke she will be all upset and stressy at you.
Tell her you truly like her for who she is, but that she DOES have a sweet ass
From COD's list, you could use 2 if she isn't serious (only if she isn't serious) or 6 but funnier
( . )( . )
Banned
This is terrible advice. Nobody likes a puzzy who cant throw her sh!t back at her.2-D said:Why would you ever agree to that? Seriously?
Like honestly, if you don't want her to break up with you, don't tell her you're using her, "agree and amplify" my ass. If she doesn't take it as 100% a joke she will be all upset and stressy at you.
Tell her you truly like her for who she is, but that she DOES have a sweet ass
OH NO ! You mean if I'm not an agreeable yes man.. she.. she could be upset or possibly even leave me? But where would I find another immature chick who didnt have a sense of humour?2-D said:
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
mustfirstregister
Master Don Juan
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next her.
Proselytiser
Senior Don Juan
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Haha. "Are you using me for sex?" "Are you using me for commitment?"horaholic said:
I like Julius's response, cept I'd usually tell her don't start that crap with me.
Have you ever actually said to a girl you're using her for sex when she asked? I did that once because I listened to David DeAngelo for too long and the girl was really upset. If she's actually serious and does think that, then these witty remarks are just going to cause more trouble than good. I promise. Go try it out in real life if you think that'd work.( . )( . ) said:
WhitePimp
Master Don Juan
Just flip it back around, like she's just using your hot bod as a sex toy, etc. Turn it into a game, make her feel like she's asking a dumb question, and laugh it off.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
i think this man is lost, somebody please direct him to the cosmopolitan website!2-D said:Why would you ever agree to that? Seriously?
Like honestly, if you don't want her to break up with you, don't tell her you're using her, "agree and amplify" my ass. If she doesn't take it as 100% a joke she will be all upset and stressy at you.
Tell her you truly like her for who she is, but that she DOES have a sweet ass
From COD's list, you could use 2 if she isn't serious (only if she isn't serious) or 6 but funnier
I think you're being an armchair theorist. I've done similar stuff in real life (tried using ****y/witty replies to this sort of thing), I'm speaking from true experience. Feel free to go tell your girlfriend you're using her though... And then you'll know what happens. Tell me honestly when you've ever done that in real life. If you or any of the others have actually done this in real life and she didn't get all pissy, then it's a personal issue with me not delivering it right. But as far as my experience goes, that is a big no no.Ease said:
I'm trying to give this guy advice here, it's obvious that his girlfriend has a genuine issue with the relationship and she's calling him out, much like you would do to her if something was up.
Look guys, this isn't just her saying "are you using me for sex?" If she keeps bringing it up this is genuinely a concern she has...
I'm not being a faggot, I just think you should follow WhitePimp's advice which is much better IMO.
The last girl who said this to me came at me like this.
I'm not just for sex you know. I'm not going to just be your booty call. My response was, "where is this coming from?", she went on to tell me how the last few guys she was dating were married men or men who didn't want to commit and how I had already told her that I never planned on getting married.
I responded by looking her right in the eye and saying...you know I like being with you and we have fun together, and we both enjoy that. And yes you know how I feel about marriage, but if you don't consider hanging with me fun and you want to leave, I understand. I'll miss you.
She backed down and then started telling me about how she's been stressed and her ex has been calling her and how her life is crazy. Then we had sex and she went home.
It's a test. The girl in my case has a habit of dating men who won't commit, and she knew going into it that I wouldn't commit. And if I would have changed my stance right then...it would have been down hill from there.
I noticed she threw this particular test out there when things where going really well and we had started spending more time together than normal. It was starting to feel like a committed relationship. It was a big sign for me to pull back and let her miss me a bit. It's that challenge that makes her 'gina tingle, not the comfort of knowing she has me in her pocket. She's been back to her old self since then.
Study your girl and study her behavior,dating history and timing and you will know exactly what she means by this...your girl may have a different reason for her test at this time. Good luck.
I'm not just for sex you know. I'm not going to just be your booty call. My response was, "where is this coming from?", she went on to tell me how the last few guys she was dating were married men or men who didn't want to commit and how I had already told her that I never planned on getting married.
I responded by looking her right in the eye and saying...you know I like being with you and we have fun together, and we both enjoy that. And yes you know how I feel about marriage, but if you don't consider hanging with me fun and you want to leave, I understand. I'll miss you.
She backed down and then started telling me about how she's been stressed and her ex has been calling her and how her life is crazy. Then we had sex and she went home.
It's a test. The girl in my case has a habit of dating men who won't commit, and she knew going into it that I wouldn't commit. And if I would have changed my stance right then...it would have been down hill from there.
I noticed she threw this particular test out there when things where going really well and we had started spending more time together than normal. It was starting to feel like a committed relationship. It was a big sign for me to pull back and let her miss me a bit. It's that challenge that makes her 'gina tingle, not the comfort of knowing she has me in her pocket. She's been back to her old self since then.
Study your girl and study her behavior,dating history and timing and you will know exactly what she means by this...your girl may have a different reason for her test at this time. Good luck.
eaglez1177
Master Don Juan
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HahahahWar Against Betaism said:
And do not follow 2-D's advice...
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.