"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

What to do?

Alexandrovich

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Hey I'm new to this forum. Some of the posts and articles are very insightful and have completely changed my persepctive on almost everything.

I've been txting this girl for quite some time and whenever I try to initiate real life contact (ask her to a gig im going to, drinks, etc) she gives me the busy line but never offers a counterproposal. I read through anti dumps post and the 2 strikes and your out post really makes sense. If this girl was interested she would not have turned me down back to back without offering some kind of counterproposal right?

I was told the best thing to do in this situation is to move on and find other girls. If she reinitiates contact then reply but don't ask her on a date again right? Now this girl has been doing this for months. Reinitiates contact with me. We talk. I ask her out. She says she's busy. I ingore her and then she'll txt me a few days later asking how I am. Its getting very tiresome.

How can I communicate to this girl that she should stop txting me unless she actually wants to meet up?

Is "Look, not to be rude but if you don't have plans to meet me anytime soon can you stop txting me". I figured that might be a bit too direct and may spook her if she is genuinely interested in how I'm doing.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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princesimba

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well im completely new here, so please dont follow my advice!!!!!!

But if i were you, i would reply
"you know, girls that text me only do so because they like me"

the next time she texts me :D
 

The Karate Kid

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Talk to her when she initiates it, don't ask her out, and play it cool. Also date other girls. She will either hint at hanging if you talk, or she won't, and you don't have to waste time.

Or you can jus have a text friend. They aren't so bad actually. Gives you someone to talk to, and maybe she could help you with your new girls
 

Iceberg

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The Karate Kid said:
Talk to her when she initiates it, don't ask her out, and play it cool. Also date other girls. She will either hint at hanging if you talk, or she won't, and you don't have to waste time.

Or you can jus have a text friend. They aren't so bad actually. Gives you someone to talk to, and maybe she could help you with your new girls
Oh god. Is that the way the world is going? Text friends? That's sad.

My advice - After months of dealing with her, I'd consider it a lost cause. If she's still reaching out to text you, but not giving you anything sexually...or even a date, then f**k it. She just friend zoned herself.

Even if you did get a date with her, it's not worth it. All the work that you had to put into this....it's like paying $1000 bucks for something you know is only worth $200. At the end you might get what you want, but you'd always know that it's not worth what you put into it.

I'd love for you to say "Stop texting me if we're not going to hang out." But that's just because it would be funny...and true. In reality, that tactic wouldn't work. It would just put her on the defensive.
 

vatoloco

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Alexandrovich said:
I've been txting this girl for quite some time and whenever I try to initiate real life contact (ask her to a gig im going to, drinks, etc) she gives me the busy line but never offers a counterproposal.
Problems in RED. This one's a lost cause.

I was told the best thing to do in this situation is to move on and find other girls. If she reinitiates contact then reply but don't ask her on a date again right? Now this girl has been doing this for months.
:eek:


Reinitiates contact with me. We talk. I ask her out. She says she's busy. I ingore her and then she'll txt me a few days later asking how I am. Its getting very tiresome.
Here.



How can I communicate to this girl that she should stop txting me unless she actually wants to meet up?
Here.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Alexandrovich

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Iceberg said:
Oh god. Is that the way the world is going? Text friends? That's sad.


I'd love for you to say "Stop texting me if we're not going to hang out." But that's just because it would be funny...and true. In reality, that tactic wouldn't work. It would just put her on the defensive.
Haha yeh you're right. I hate the concept of any electronic contact as the norm. Great advice.

vatoloco said:
Problems in RED. This one's a lost cause.


:eek:



Here.




Here.
Invaluable advice. Fortunately I'm seeing other women so its not a huge concern. The weird thing is I've ****ed this girl a few times already which is why her behaviour is rather surprising.
 

vatoloco

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Alexandrovich said:
Invaluable advice. Fortunately I'm seeing other women so its not a huge concern. The weird thing is I've ****ed this girl a few times already which is why her behaviour is rather surprising.
Women will be always be women.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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H0es will be H0es.
 
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