"Blank Mind on Dates? She's Dropping Hints You Keep Missing"

The plates get cleared and the silence lands like a brick. You can feel her waiting. Your brain offers up your commute, your job, the weather — topics that have ended more second dates than bad breath.

Here's what most guys never learn: women hand out free conversational material all night long. Tiny clues about what they actually want to discuss. Catch them and you never run out of things to say — because she's telling you what to say next.

Rule 4 of the "22 Rules" trains your ear to catch every single one.

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What to do with my ex?

Lost Cause

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I have an ex girlfriend whom I dated for 2 1/2 years and broke up with at the end of last June. Well I haven't called her (or talked to her) since Halloween and she has been calling me off and on ever since. I'd say she's called me an average of once a month since. She even called me on valentines day and that got me to wonder what the hell she wants from me. Why would an ex call you on valentines day? I wasn't home when she called and there was no message on the machine but it was clearly her #. I told myself I wouldn't call her back but I can't help but wonder what her agenda is.

Any advice?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Skel

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If you dont want her back then why call her back?

Curiousity killed the cat ya know. Ive always wondered what the hell the cat was so curious about anyways. I hope it wasnt something as stupid as an ex though :p
 

DreamerZZ35

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Originally posted by Lost Cause
I have an ex girlfriend whom I dated for 2 1/2 years and broke up with at the end of last June. Well I haven't called her (or talked to her) since Halloween and she has been calling me off and on ever since. I'd say she's called me an average of once a month since. She even called me on valentines day and that got me to wonder what the hell she wants from me. Why would an ex call you on valentines day? I wasn't home when she called and there was no message on the machine but it was clearly her #. I told myself I wouldn't call her back but I can't help but wonder what her agenda is.

Any advice?
May I offer some observations? I would guess since you're posting about her that she broke up with you. Clearly if you had broken up with her, you most likely wouldnt care if she was calling you. Personally, my experience as that going back is a big waste of time. You broke up for good reasons. If she broke up with you, do you really want to re experience the pain she will throw down on your heart?

Go get new digits dude, find a HB8+ with a great heart, loyalty, integrity with a great attitude and you wont care what your ex wants... in fact, you will tell her to stop calling
 

Slickster

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Its entirely possible that she just wants to say "Hey how you been?"

There doesn't have to be an agenda. You were best buds for a long time maybe she misses you and wants to talk.

If you are happy where you are at right now in life then there isn't really any problem with contacting her.

However if you have a little oneitis going then stay the hell away.
 

Lost Cause

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Originally posted by Slickster
Its entirely possible that she just wants to say "Hey how you been?"

There doesn't have to be an agenda. You were best buds for a long time maybe she misses you and wants to talk.

If you are happy where you are at right now in life then there isn't really any problem with contacting her.

However if you have a little oneitis going then stay the hell away.

I would of thought the same thing had she called me on a random day. But in my past experiences, ex'es don't call on Valentines Day, the day of love to ask their ex "how they are". it just doesn't make sense.

I wouldn't say that I have 'oneitis', but I do miss her at times. I have moved on and am doing well for myself. I'm financially set for life, sing in a band, am in school, healthy, happy and on my own. She complemented me very well and that's the part I miss. Other than that I'm doing awesome without her.

I'll probably give her a call this week. She's called me 4 times now with me not calling her back. That's a good ratio to keep with an ex.
 

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You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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ManOMan

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it sounds like this is an issue for you because you WANT her to call you , stroke your ego, and tell you she misses you.

The question here shouldnt be "what did she want?"

the question should be "Why do I care that she called so much that I have to ask a forum about it?"
 

Lost Cause

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Originally posted by ManOMan
it sounds like this is an issue for you because you WANT her to call you , stroke your ego, and tell you she misses you.

The question here shouldnt be "what did she want?"

the question should be "Why do I care that she called so much that I have to ask a forum about it?"

Yeah that is part of it. I'd love for her to say that after she broke up with me for some other jerkass. And now she's all alone on valentines day and calling me. Yeah that would feel good. Seeing as I was a greay guy to her (not AFC, but a good guy). She was young and didn't know any different from me (in terms of boyfriends). She went to find out and lost.


Yes... I think every man would love to hear that from an ex.
 

NewMan

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Lost Cause I agree.

But remember it can never be the same.

Don't think about it and move on - that phone could possibly open up a box within you that would be better off closed.

Forget gloating.

Just keep doing what your doing - moving forward.
 
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Maybe she misses what she oncw had, after getting disrespected from other dudes!! You came up in her mind!
 

ManOMan

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chances are, she isnt with the jerko any longer. Gwhen a girl is into a guy, there is NO other man in her mind. But she is calling you on V day.

Most likely she is thinking about you and wants to find out if you have moved on or not.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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If it was me I'd ignore her until she got the point- if you don't want her. If all you want from her is sex it'll be very hard to get that- though if you do it'll turn out bad like it did in my situation with my last ex. One of you will eventually get emotional and get jealous of the other.
 
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