"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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What to do when there's no real plan?

wrender

Don Juan
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Got a date with an HB8 tonight. I met this one at a mutual friends house a few weeks back. We hit it off pretty good. Strong eye contact, good conversation, and a number close (not asking but telling her I'd like to call her :) ). The only thing I negleceted was kino.

Saw her a 2nd time last Friday since I invited her to a small Labor day party I hosted at my home. I didn't get to give her a whole lot of attention since there were many others there to entertain as well. But this is probably a good thing since I didn't want to be clingy. but I did slip in some kino this time.

So anyway, I called her a couple days after the party and told her I'd like to come out to her place Wednesday night and she happily agreed. I'm a bit nervous though because I don't have a gameplan for the evening. I'm not familiar with the town she lives in so I don't know where to take her or what to do with her. I just said I'd come out there and be spontaneous. So it looks like I'm going to have to put her in partial control of the evening due to the fact that she knows where to go and I obviously do not. Not the ideal situation so I might do some research and suggest that we try a particular place. I'm sure we'll start off by hanging out at her apartment for a while talking, but I don't want that to grow stale.

Incidentally, she lives in Bridgeport (Chicago). So maybe whitesoxbill will read this and offer some suggestions.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Vulpine

Master Don Juan
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whitesoxbill is from Wisconsin. We don't like FISH/FIB's/Flatlanders round these parts.

Go for a walk. It's called "playing it by ear". If you see something you want to do, do it. Meanwhile, enjoy the walk and enjoy the company. Your mission is the walk and the woman, not "to do something".
 

wrender

Don Juan
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whitesoxbill is from Wisconsin. We don't like FISH/FIB's/Flatlanders round these parts.
Whoops. I guess the name threw me off.

Yeah, I hear ya. I have this annoying part of me that feels a bit helpless with out a gameplan. Must be an AFC remnant instilled by my mother and grandmother that says I should take a woman on a nice "date".
 

squirrels

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Go out for coffee, talk about sh!t. If something pops up, do that.

Otherwise...hell, just do what YOU think would be fun to do and invite her to come along and share in the fun.

The idea of a date is not to "impress" her by selecting something that'd be fun for her. It's to show her the fun times that your life generates. Bring her into YOUR frame.
 
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